Happy Friday and I hope your weekend plans are great ones! I’m having a fantastic day this early in the morning. Why? you ask. Well, it’s because I fit into a pair of jeans that I thought I wouldn’t. They are size 8 and NOT stretchy—so I’m in a good mood. Yes. Last year I purchased these jeans at Loft for $14.99. I love them because of the ankle length. For some reason I feel this length looks better with heels than the regular length does. Naturally both regular and ankle look fantastic with ballet flats, but that’s just my opinion……..

 Bonaparte will love this pic because I’m wearing clothing! I’m just happy these fit!

Maybe my 6-point dinner from last night helped. Four rice cake squares topped with a bit of garlicky mashed avocado and a cute little shrimp!

Actually, these would also make great little summertime appetizers!

Please let me start off by telling you that I won’t be applying another coat of the Jergen’s. As time went by, the self-tanner became darker.   I almost didn’t take a picture to show you because Bonaparte was quite upset from my “leg” pictures of yesterday’s posting. His reaction?

Bonaparte: “Cassee. Leesen to me. Ou canno(t) show peeteurs on you bleg of ou in you undearwahr. Eez nit rit.” “Dohn do zhat”. “Pliz”.

Me: “I was wearing a bathing suit bottom. You know, the navy with the white dots that I got at Aerie last year?” “On sale”. “I even wrote that it was a bathing suit bottom—just in case any fundamentalists or prospective employers read my post!”

Bonaparte: “Oh merde.” ( and other words in French that I didn’t quite understand because he was very upset.

Me: “Hey. Peeps need to see what old lady legs look like. OK?”

But—because I am a giver, I have two pics of how the tanner worked. The photo of my feet gives a better view of the tanner—simply because I did such a lousy job of applying on my feet. You can see the pale against the tan.

Note to Bonaparte: I’m wearing rolled-up Old Navy PJ Bottoms. See..the legs got darker over night!

Here’s where you can really tell. It’s so awful–I’m great at the legs, but for the love of Mary, I just screw the feet application.   At least you can see the difference!

So yeah, the tanning mousse works, but it isn’t “Instant Sun”, Jergens needs to revamp their wording.

It really does work–just not really “instantly”–but I’ll repurchase!

Back to more important issues…

So this morning while I was in bed, drinking coffee and being a lazy slob, entitled unemployed wench, princess, spoiled old-lady brat, being an informed citizen  being a complete voyeur, by watching the news Duggar family and wondering just why these pretend Christians call daily household chores “jurisdictions”, I had an epiphany about reality TV.

I call them the “Duggashians”.    Their bizarre world–where homeschooling means taking their dog to get washed and household chores are jurisdictions!

How come there are no “live” variety shows on TV anymore? Ed Sullivan WAS true reality TV; as were all those variety shows of the ’50’s, and ’60’s. You couldn’t get more “live” than Ed Sullivan. Come on. Don’t you know that Jim Morrison of the Doors got into a lot of trouble because Ed wanted the “girl we couldn’t get much higher” lyrics from “Light My Fire” changed to “girl, we couldn’t get much better”. Jim didn’t change the lyrics, and the Doors were banned from any future appearances on Ed Sullivan. THAT was controversy!

I get that Ed Sullivan was upset with Morrison, but look at that face! How could anyone stay angry at Jim Morrison? He was so good looking!!!

There was no hair pulling or physical altercations; there was no nastiness verbalized, no “talking heads” being interviewed and spewing out awful things about others.

It was just the simple action of being banned. End of story. Ed never had them on the show and The Doors remained incredibly successful!

I can remember Sunday evenings. 8:00 PM. Channel 2, CBS. The entire family rallied around the small-screened TV set to watch Ed Sullivan.

His show was epic!

We kids were fascinated by Topo Gigio and Senor Wences, the ventriloquist who made puppets out of his hands. Remember the dancing Russian bears, or the plate spinners?

Yes, there was a time when this was entertainment!

Where did Sullivan find these people? But the point is—they entertained us.

We looked forward to whenever this little cutie was on Ed Sullivan.

And Senor Wences had us all making faces on our hands!

Even as a kid, I looked forward to Alan King’s musings about his family, airplanes and everything else. His lone prop of a cigar was greatness—his delivery was incredible. I loved his humor so much.

One of the greatest stand-ups of all time!

Same with Stiller and Meara—is our younger generation aware that Ben Stiller’s parents, and George Costanza’s dad was a semi-regular on The Ed Sullivan Show? Their “shtick” was their inter-faith marriage. His Jewish background and her Irish/Catholic background gave us many laughs and was relatable. And nobody found it offensive!

We could all relate to the comedy of Stiller and Meara! I think of them when I’m with my sister and her husband! There is so much humor in inter-faith marriages and it isn’t offensive!

I’ll never forget when the Beatles performed on Ed Sullivan. It was the biggest event. Even though I was a few years younger than the screaming teenaged girls in the live audience, it was still amazing to see the group that changed rock and roll, as well as pop music history! We were a family, from ages 4 up to 35 (wow, I still can’t believe my dad was only 35 when I was ten years old!) watching entertainment history together!

He may not have liked the Doors, but Sullivan loved the “Lads from Liverpool”!

Ed Sullivan’s variety wasn’t the only show of its genre. Sullivan’s show may have been live but what about Dean Martin?

He may have sung about how everybody loves somebody sometime, but I loved Dino ALL the time!

Dean Martin’s Variety Show was another great showcase for entertainers who sang, danced, and joked around with the ever-suave and cool host, Dino! He always had a drink in one hand, a cigarette in another, and was sexist as all get-out. But you know what? He may have been sexist, but he was so with all the charm and panache in the world.

He smoked. He drank. He was sexist. But I loved this man! He was one cool cat!

The sad thing is, he would be crucified if he was on TV today! In the present time, 12-step programs would be offended by the glass of booze. Physicians and healthcare organizations would be rallying to get him off the air due to an “unhealthy” lifestyle of said booze and cigs. Women’s groups would be rallying and creating petitions due to his extremely sexist treatment of womenfolk.  It’s too bad—because people have lost their good sense of humor.

When I was a young girl, I wanted to be one of Dean’s Golddigger ladies. That big hair! Those outfits! And Dino!!

Before she was Carol Brady, Florence Henderson was better known for her singing and dancing talent!

Yet, as sexist as Dean may have been (and all in good fun), many women viewers these days appear to be OK with the god-awful way in which women treat other women on shows such as the Bravo “Real Housewives” franchise—or even “Mob Wives”. At least Dean Martin appreciated women!!!!

Jill Zarin–formerly of “Real Housewives of New York City” never had a nice word about anyone! Women being mean to other women–not entertainment!

How about The Carol Burnett Show?

With Lyle Waggoner and with Tim Conway–this was a terrific variety show. And kudos for a woman to break the old boy system!

Who can forget her infamous skit about “Gone With The Wind”—where Carol, as Scarlett walks down a staircase dressed in not only drapes, but the curtain rod as well?

Quite possibly, one of the funniest and most unforgettable comedy skits of all time!

Who can forget Harvey Korman’s constant distraction by Tim Conway and breaking out into a laugh?

Korman, trying, as always, to suppress laughter.

Singing. Dancing. Skits. Fun. Entertainment!! THAT’s what this old lady wants to see back on the TV screen.  Reality stars are NOT entertainers! The Kardashian’s became famous because of a sex tape while the Duggars became famous for having sex at least 19 times! I don’t think having talented lady parts is considered entertainment—well, not the kind of entertainment I’m talkin’ about!

I watched this show once or twice and just couldn’t anymore. I just–could not!

I miss Ed. And Merv.

Ohhhh. How I loved Merv. He may have had a talk show, but he had lots of variety!

And Mike Douglas.

His afternoon talk/variety show was fun to watch after school.

First time I heard Sammy sing “Candyman” was on Mike Douglas’s Show

And Dean—with his regular variety show AND his “Golddiggers. I miss the controversial cool of the Smothers Brothers–and their great guests like the Who and Jefferson Airplane!

This mom always liked BOTH of you best!

Cool guests like Jefferson Airplane kept the Brothers Smothers popular with young people! Truth be told–every now and then if I’m at a party or gathering where I’ve had a few drinks, I’m always tempted to put my Grace Slick on and sing a rendition of “White Rabbit”.  We sound alike, you know!

And Laugh-In’s old reruns. And Carol Burnett, Red Skelton, Jonathan Winters, Andy Williams.

So many talents came from this show…

Sock it to me. Again and again!

I loved whenever the Osmonds were on Andy Williams!

Donny may be a cutie, but I was seriously crushin on Merrill. I still love me some Donny and Marie!

And yes, I even want The Hollywood Palace back so that I can fondly remember all those appearances by Tom Jones!

Remember  this show on Saturday nights?

Is it so unusual for me to be in love with you since I was nine years old?

THAT’S Reality! My birthday is quickly approaching. I’m going to ask Bonaparte to go onto Amazon and order DVD’s of The Ed Sullivan Show, The Dean Martin Show, The Smothers Brothers Show, Mike Douglas, Merv….

Imagine. The next time the kids visit, after dinner and great conversation, we can go into the living room, I can slip a Dean Martin or Ed Sullivan CD into the DVD player and we can watch some old-school ENTERTAINMENT as a family! Wouldn’t that be neat, keen, peachy, freakin’ cool??

Bring back the talent—not the talentless!

You know you are in for a treat today! The Beatles on Ed…and…Dean Martin with Engelbert Humperdink!!!!!!!! XOXOXOXOXO! Enjoy your weekend!