I’m still in pain from the mad rush of last minute Mother’s Day shoppers yesterday in the land of Retail Hell. My once-perfect, narrow feet—now growing bunions, are screaming and barking and not happy with the swelling that comes from 8 hours on foot.
My poor feet. The only cure for this is an oversized glass of wine!
Oh. The job is part-time so that I can’t be eligible for medical insurance, but with that part-time comes a full-time day into night.
And I’m pissed because this job is taking time from my passion. Our blog! And I say “our” because it is ours! It’s the family of “Atypical60” readers and friends and I am the mother.
I am that mom!
Sremack got it right! I wanted to be Mary Poppins but am more of that hot mess Miss Hannigan!
And as wrenching as yesterday was, I had a great time helping out kids who were at the store to get their moms gifts for this special day.
I imagined their mothers to be perfect. That blonde and blue Philadelphia Mainline mom. After all, we ran out of Tory Burch and Kate Spade bags. I also imagined these same moms dressed head to toe in Lilly Pulitzer as they attend a fancy brunch.
This is not me!
In addition, I envisioned the scene when the children give their moms the gifts. And the moms give one of those half-smiles because either one of their friends has that same bag or the moms think the gifted bags “just don’t work”.
And I am the mom who will have to take those returned bags back and it pains me to envision the faces of those children who realize that their mom doesn’t love that gift!
MY version of this is below….I’m sure my kids are thinking what I’m writing…
“M” is for the many times she embarrassed me..
“O” is for the countless times she yelled “Oh shit. Why did you do that”?
“T” is for the thousands of times she shoved her tits in our mouths when we were babies so we would stop crying.
“H” is for the hot mess she was when she had no time to get dressed to take us to school when we missed the bus.
“E” is for her loving eyes. So crossed that she pretended each one of us was the set of twins she always wanted since she saw double!
“R” is for those days of “REST” that came once a month when she had her period and cramps so badly on the second day that she didn’t leave her room!
Look. I’ve never been the perfect mom. I’m the one who drove the kids to school while in my pj’s and hair rollers.
I’m the one who would show up at a PTO meeting with spilled coffee on my shirt. Once time, I actually showed up at a school function with two different colored shoes. At least they were the same kind of shoe!
But I’m that mom who always had an extra chair at the dinner table—even if it meant opening a box of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese and throwing a plate of Little Debbie brownies for dessert on the table.
I’m that mom who “ambushed” my kids from school every now and then to take them to lunch at McDonalds. I’m the one who let them have a “well” day off from school and sat on the sofa with them watching TV.
And I believe there are more moms who are just like me than those other perfect moms.
As awful as my retail hell day was yesterday, when I arrived home, a large box was waiting in our foyer.
Jake, Roman, and Oona sent me some beautiful flowers….
Flowers from the Little Kiddles!
But more touching were the words on the card that came with those flowers.
As much of that bad mom that I was, they still love me!
And once again, I searched YouTube for my favorite video. A “gift” from Roman from 2007. He and his friends shot this “Mother’s Day Rhyme”. Every Mother’s Day, I share it with my friends and today, I want to share it with you. Keep watching. After about 30 seconds, he starts rapping. And it’s great!
But the most important thing is that he made this rhyme when I was at my lowest point. It was just after my divorce and I was feeling extremely shitty about myself—so shitty, in fact, that a pity party would have been a high point!
So moms—this Mother’s Day Rhyme is for you. And your friends and every mom out there!
To all my moms out there! This is for you! Thank you Roman–this is the gift that keeps on giving!
Oh Catherine – you brought tears to my eyes – truly you did. The video was great – Happy Mothers Day Catherine! 🙂
Awwww. Terry. Thank you so much!!! Now you’re making me cry and my mascara will be dripping! I gotta run to work now. Retail Hell time! XOXOXOXO!!!
Loved this post as it reminded me of myself and made me smile. Happy Mother’s Day.
Happy Mother’s Day Lori. We are kindred Spirits! XOXOXOXO!!!
Wow … that is amazing! Such a talented young man. Thank
you for sharing it and Happy Mother’s Day.
Hi Jane! THANKS!!! Yeah. That rap is one of the best mom’s day gifts of all time!!! And I pass it on to you! XOXOXOXO!!!
Thanks Jane!!! He is quite the talent and I get a kick out of this every year! Happy Mother’s Day to you too! XOXOXOXO!
A wonderful post! Happy Mother’s Day, Cathe! <3 <3
You tootie you Cutie Patootie! And Happy Mom’s To Be Day to your daughter! XOXOXOXO!!!
Hahah….thank you, Cathe! It’s happy mom to be for my sister….I only have an 8 year old son 😀
Oops! My bad. Happy Mom’s to be for your sister!!!!!XOXOXOXO!!!!
Fantastic – we’d have been the mum-posse that the perfect mums would have given up on (at least I hope so), you have great kids – and they love you, so many kids are obligated to give a present or big display as they are guilt tripped by their perfect mothers. Who’d want a perfect mother anyway any more than we would want perfect children – our kids are better than perfect, they are kind, funny and wonderful human beings and each one is precious and unique. Perfect would be such a come down and pretty dull in comparison – so we’ve done something right even if we don’t quite know how the hell we did it.
I have my own secret not-perfect mummy story to share (shhh it is shameful but I can share with the family here), many years ago my children got head lice from one of the perfect families around here, so we gave them the f***-its as payback – headlice are hard to get rid of, but small children once they get hold of a good “f***-it” – well nigh impossible to shift), there are other shameful mother-truths but I don’t want to scare you off
HAHAHAHAH!!! Juliet! I LOVE the headlice thing!!! Yeah. The perfectly perfect mothers are not so perfect after all! I’m with you in the fact that I’m not big on the huge displays. Honestly. At around 6PM I still had stragglers coming in to pick up that “perfect” and expensive gift to prove their love to mom without so much as a thought except “is this the last one?”. And I also had a moment of poignancy. A woman came in and I inadvertently wished her a “happy mother’s day”. She said she is unable to have children and Mothers Day is awkward for her. I had an epiphany and told her that I was truly sorry for being insensitive. We ended up having a great conversation and this woman made my day. I also wish a happy “non-mother’s day’ as well! XOXOXOXO!!!
How were you to know hon, but you possibly made her day by then talking to her. It is strange isn’t it – some of the most maternal people I know haven’t had children (their biolgical or adopted), and some of the most non-maternal people I know have children.
But yes happy non-mothers day too!!!
Wow!!! Love that video and what a voice!!!! Thank you! P.S. Wear “comfortable” (ugly) shoes during your retail hours. You’ll thank me….
Leslie. I’m ready to wear those ugly shoes. So ready!!! Glad you loved Roman’s video! XOXOXO
Happy Mothers Day Beautiful Friend 😘😘😘😘😘😘
Back atcha La-la-la-la-la-love-lee La-Linda!!! XOXOXOXO!!!
Awesome!! Your feet will toughen up soon, you’re building up some nice lovely callouses to withstand the pain. *wink*
LOL. So true. Soon I will be able to walk on that horribly hot sand at the beach this summer without feeling the heat!! XOXOXOXO!!!
Lovely, lovely post.
Such a great post, Catherine, so laughed at the not-quite-perfect mum thing!!! I do hope your feet are getting more used to the 8-hour shift and that you got lots of commission that day! Mother’s Day isn’t quite as big here as it is in the States (and it’s been and gone a month ago) but hey, it’s getting there, as in getting very commercialised and there’s now a lot of ‘you must buy a present for your mother’ etc. etc. I like getting a card with heartfelt thanks and other stuff written inside – that’s what I want and that’s what I get!!! xxxxxx
Hi Penny. I’m with you. The thought of my kids running around at the 11th hour to buy me a ridiculous gift is insane. Nothing wrong with a gift but it is the thought that counts. My true happiness was hearing from the kids yesterday after work. Ugh. I don’t even care about the commission. I want to go back to an office job but ageist employers here in the States are keeping hundreds of thousands of elders from working. And they wonder why corporations are in trouble….XOXOXOXO!!!
Glad to hear you had a nice Mother’s Day Catherine! I had a shoe mishap too, only mine was with same color and different shoes to a parent-teacher meeting. There was even a slight difference in heel height that I hadn’t noticed during that entire busy day. I was mortified when I took my shoes off that night. Anyway, it sounds like you’re a great mom who raised 3 happy and healthy kids. Love your son’s video, I think it should be a Public Service Announcement, for sure!
Hi Margaret! Thanks so much! And a belated Happy Mother’s Day to you as well. LOL–the shoe thing. I think it has happened to so many moms–proof that sometimes multitasking is more difficult than it sounds!!! Glad you love Roman’s video! XOXOXOXO!
OMG! I am speechless! Wow! That right there tells everyone just what kind of a wonderful mother you were. I had to smile as I listened because I found myself shaking my head and thinking, yeah, that’s so Catherine. 😀 What a beautiful, beautiful gift. And what a talented son! (I do hope your poor feet are feeling better!)
Thanks Lady Calen! My feet are healing but I’m so happy that you enjoyed Roman’s tribute!!!!! XOXOXOXO!!!
Wonderful song and a wonderful post as always Catherine. You are brilliant! Your children know they are very lucky to have you so you must have done a very good job with them all! My kids are still getting over the time I turned up to their school dressed as a space woman in black leather with a long black wig, a silver mask and a radio made of fruit gums. The invitation to the school play said we should dress up too but sadly I was the only one that made the effort! Whoops!
Gillian! I LOVE that you dressed for the occasion to your children’s school play! I would have done the same!! Trust me your kids will remember that fondly and with some major laughs in the future! XOXOXOXOXOXO!!!
Happy Mothers day too you….. There are no power or treasure on earth like mother,
may god shower his mercy upon them.
Mothers hold their children’s hands for a while,
but their hearts forever.
Thank you Mary! XOXOXOXOX