Atypical 60

Okay. Before I get into the juicy details of this post, allow me to say that, due to personal reasons, this summer has been challenging.  I won’t divulge information that’s too personal but, sometimes events happen in life that remain not for sharing.  That said, I hope you like this post.  Sometimes, we need a little push and the GLP-1 has been that nudge I needed.

We had more challenges than the damage the leaky fridge did!

Pre-menopause, it was easy for me to lose weight if I had gained. Or, it was easy to maintain my weight.  I’ve gone from thin to not-so-thin.  At my lowest, which is when I was 31 years old 1t 117, to maintaining a pretty decent weight of 137 during the years  after giving birth to my daughter and after a few years, reaching a high of 180 pounds after going through a lot of stress.

Oona and me at Long Beach 1992. I was 137 pounds and felt great!  At this juncture, I will be happy to reach 145 pounds! Oona was three and I did manage to lose stress weight.

Then came menopause.  That special time of life when, thankfully, my periods stopped. And with that came a different quality of life. Hot flashes so intense I pulled over while driving to take off my shirt and drive around in a bra. Headaches that really weren’t in my head but the back of my neck to my shoulders.  Having to have a tweezer in the car at all times, and one in each purse because the eyebrows that were shedding were now popping up as misplaced hairs, aka lady whiskers, on my chin.

One would think that living like a walking sauna would provide weight loss. But it didn’t.

My body also changed. It expanded.  My once shapely and smaller waist was inflating faster than a tire tube. My belly, of which was always a little sticky-outy, was now one giant mudflap. My upper arms took on the appearance of a pelican’s mouth when full of water and fish.   The thighs?  Yeah. They became thighnormous!  And the weight continued to pack on no matter what I did.

As in the words of my late, great dad: “It must be jelly ’cause jam don’t shake like that”.  Yeah. My belly shook!

I joined a gym through work. Went pretty regularly but wasn’t motivated. Then I lost my job and lost the gym membership.  I attended one—yes, one Yoga class at the Y. I couldn’t return because people had dirty and disgusting feet and I didn’t want those dawgs anywhere near my precious being. Weight Watchers no longer worked for me because the brand stopped the workshops and went cyber.

Basically, THIS was what made me never return to a yoga class. Dirty and disgusting feet.

It was time to do this on my own.  Now, when the weight climbed up to 155, I was barely able to fit into my beloved size 8 pants. Luckily, at that weight, I was able to sort of hide the excess because I am a large-boned individual. I am not a gamine nor am I slight. I got the heavy bones.

But once my weight hit the 165 range, excess body weight couldn’t be hidden anymore. Love handles overflowed from my J. Crew white denim shorts that I wore for many summers.  Form-fitting dresses gave the illusion that I was 5 months pregnant—and at my age, it would have been the second coming of Christ if that were so.  Even my titties seemed larger.  Age after menopause crept up like the itsy-bitsy spider.

Thankfully, my beloved Wynne maxi dress from Lilly Pulitzer has a lot of stretch. From the front, it doesn’t look bad but from the side. OUCH!

Then, two years ago, we attended a birthday party out on Long Island for my brother-in-law. It was quite the bash at my sister’s beach club. And there was quite a crowd. The one thing I noticed was the majority of the women I knew and who were around my age, were skinny as f*ck.   I felt like a wildebeest.  And, after a few drinks and not-so-deep conversation, I found out these women were on Ozempic.  They were chatting the drug up as though it were a miracle worker.  I was intrigued but not quite on board.

This is what all those Long Island women looked like after being on Ozempic. I honestly do not know what Kelly Osbourne has taken to loose an incredible amount of weight and with all due respect, her dad passed away, but this is ED skinny and Tom Ford should be ashamed that he is promoting this body type. Look, I want to lose weight but remain healthy.

Later, after a visit with my doctor, I inquired about this Ozempic drug. He gave me a firm “no” and told me to watch what I eat.  Men. They don’t get it. I wasn’t asking him to give me the drug because I wanted to be bone thin, I just needed help.  In hindsight, he could have been correct but also could have recommended something more substantial than telling me to watch what I eat.

And so, the past two years had me watching what I eat and the scale not moving below 165 pounds.  During this time, the primary practice I went to changed into a “concierge” practice, which meant paying an extra $2,000 a year, over what I was paying in medical insurance to have your doctor’s visits be longer and have the doctor pay more attention to you.

I switched practices and now see a nurse-practitioner—and she’s wonderful!

Back to the story.  As you know, if you read this blog, my son, Jake, got married last August in Santa Barbara, California. (And he and my DIL gave birth to a very healthy boy two weeks ago!!) The entire time we were there it was blissful.  All three kids, my grandsons, the weather, the events—it was never ending happiness!!   My husband and I, along with my daughter and SIL and the grandsons had a great day at the beach.  Vincent and I were frolicking with the boys to give Oona and Sam a rest.  And later on, I saw it.  Oona took some photos of us with the boys. There was one of me bending over. My flabber was gasted!  Actually, my flab was overflowing from the bottom of my two-piece bathing suit.  I realized then and there that I needed to get healthier.

Here’s the proof.  I wore the same dress to Jake’s wedding that I did to Oona’s. Look at the difference.  And with body shapers, I still looked like a stuffed sausage!

Upon arriving back home, I did have an annual health checkup with my new primary. Went through initial blood tests-and naturally, got weighed. My weight was at 170 pounds.  And I didn’t mention wanting Ozempic because, at that time, I was too much in shock at my 5-pound gain and was in a funk.

Blood tests came back with an iron deficiency and borderline high BP and cholesterol.  My BP prescription was renewed from my previous doctor, and I received my new prescription.  Yet, I remained silent about looking into a GLP-1.

Throughout the year, I tried to lose weight.  I walked the hospital campus at lunchtime. I ate smaller portions during the week with only giving myself weekends with my husband to enjoy full meals.  And even then, I was still somewhat mindful. However, eating from stress and boredom continued. A bit here. A bit there added up. I wasn’t fooling anyone but myself.

And then, a few weeks ago, I had to have my annual blood draw taken.  Everything was in good shape.  I also, two weeks ago, had an appointment with my NP.  This time, my weight was 167.5 a small drop from last year’s 170.  But for the span of 52 weeks, otherwise known as 12 months, otherwise known as one year, I dropped 2.5 pounds.  It was time to come clean.

We had a great discussion. I talked. She listened. And listened well. She understood me. She knew what it was like to go through menopause. She understood issues we have with weight. She got it—that I wanted to be healthy not only for me but for my grandsons to enjoy their grandmother!

She explained that the State of Pennsylvania doesn’t allow insurance coverage for medicines for weight loss.  I was already aware of this.  Yes. If you live in the State of Pennsylvania, you’re cooked. Under my employer, The Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, I have Aetna—and the pricier PPO insurance.  Aetna, as well as many of the insurance companies are a sham.  You want to get healthy. You want to maintain a healthy weight. One that could get you off medication—but the insurance companies want you unhealthy and sick so they can get their money.  It’s a vicious cycle in America.  Even with trying send a diagnosis of high BP and cholesterol issues—Aetna said “no”.

Regardless, we spoke about taking a GLP-1.  Since I didn’t have a massive amount of weight to lose, it was better for me to start on a low dose.  She also stressed the importance of working with the medication.  The medication is a tool. It isn’t a miracle drug where I can shove copious amounts of food into my gut and magically the pounds will come off.  I need to be mindful of proteins and fiber and lower the carb intake.  I need to move. And at this point—I’m ready.

My best option was to go through Eli Lilly direct.  I am now taking Foundayo and the lowest dosage possible.  The out-of-pocket cost? 149 USD a month.  While I’m not thrilled about paying that, it’s better than paying a lot more.   Today, August 29, marks exactlya month  that I’ve been taking the pill.  This morning when I got on the scale, my weight read 156.50 pounds. That’s a loss of 11 pounds in four weeks. And I’m fine with that because I’ve been working along with my GLP-1.

I’m on the lowest dosage of Foundayo.  The first month was a nice loss but moving forward, I expect to lose maybe 1 pound a week which is healthier.

The medication’s side effects can be headaches—I’ve had none.  Constipation—luckily for me, I poop like a rabid dog so I’m fine.  Fatigue-nope.  Thirst.  YES!  I’m very thirsty and H2O is my best friend right now.  Truth be told, the best plain water on earth is NYC tap water. I used to drink it by the gallons when I lived in the City.  Now, I can only drink water if it is very, very cold. Otherwise, I add Zero Sugar drink mixes or make a big pitcher of Zero Sugar Iced Tea and keep it in the fridge.

Lots and lots of water.  Flavored. Plain. Sparkling. Just. Water!

The medication curbs my appetite in a way that I could have never imagined.  The only time I’ve never said no to food was when I was in the middle of labor, delivering my children.  And even then, I couldn’t wait to deliver my little kiddles because afterwards, I could eat!

Non-fat cottage cheese and figs are my friend these days. This is enough to fill me up.

My husband makes a great carrot rappe. Low in calories and fat and delicious.

As much as I love Biscoff, I have no desire for them right now. The food noise has become silent!

Weekends are my downfall, not with meals but with being home and putzing around the house.  Out of boredom, the fridge would be opened at least twenty times with me taking a little piece of ham. Or a cube of cheese. Or a handful of olives.  Or some chocolate. Or a sweet.  It isn’t happening anymore. To keep momentum up, I’ll have four olives but no desire to continue.  I now have boundaries.

Dinner?  I’m measuring out my food. I hadn’t done that in four decades.  Last  night, we had kabobs. I couldn’t finish it. I honestly, could not finish it. I was full.  And another thing—Vincent loves his baguettes.  With butter. And, naturally, I can’t help myself to a slice or three.  I’m not eating any bread. I’m not missing it either. I’m just okay with not eating it. Last Sunday night we had spaghetti. I measured mine out. And lucky for me, I can’t stand tomato sauce. I had mine with salt and pepper and a bit of pasta water and I was satisfied.

I couldn’t finish this kabob. I ate half and will finish the other half tonight for dinner!

Okay. I made salmon rillettes.  I had a bit but…

…not on the bread I made.  Instead…

I had rillettes on a toasted slice of 647 bread and placed the loaf in the freezer, so I could take out a piece at a time and freezing it will keep it longer.

Moving forward, the weight won’t come off quickly.  I will be pleased to lose one to two pounds a week until I hit my goal of—between 145 pounds and 147 pounds.  I’m not in this to get skinny. I’m in this to get healthy. In October, I have a follow up appointment.  If I’m stalled, I can go up to a slightly higher dosage costing 199 USD a month but I’m hoping this lowest dosage will fulfill my needs.

My clothes are fitting better.  Even jeans. Does it look like I lost weight?  Not really, but when I turn to the side, it’s apparent my gut is going down in size–and that’s a good thing!

My gut is going down considerably. It’s still there but going down..

Another Wynne maxi shows the shrinking gut. Still there but smaller. 

Jeans? I’m in a smaller size–but still have a ways to go to…

Get back into the jeans of yesteryear–glad I kept them!

Sometimes, we need a bit of help to attain goals.  Sometimes, we can’t do it alone. Sometimes our bodies need help and it’s okay to seek it and use that help wisely!

BLOGGER ANNOUNCEMENT:  I happened to start this post immediately after my previous one regarding wearing heels.  Overall, the time frame was almost a month ago.

Then it happened.  I threw my back out.

I only wish it was that easy!

Very badly.  So badly that I couldn’t walk and was bedridden for a few days, went back to work, sat in my chair at my computer for 7 ½ hours for another week, then was out for additional time because my back was not healing.  One doctor’s visit later, muscle relaxers, a steroid a heating pad, and a doctor’s note for more time off then finding out I have sciatica, I hesitate to say I am better, but I am.  Is it aging? What is it?  I used to be the picture of physical health.  Anyway, now that my back is feeling 99.9 percent better, let’s get on with this post—shall we?

I couldn’t even walk this nicely.  Wow! Muscle relaxers were my friend!

If you read this blog, most likely you might follow me on Instagram or other social media.  In fact, social media and the Internet is seemingly the new Mall of the USA.

Don’t get me wrong.  Online shopping can be a good thing if you don’t have time to physically get dressed, get into your car, make sure there is gas in your car, if there isn’t enough gas, can one afford to fill up the tank in order to get on the highway filled with aggressive drivers, and make your way to a boutique, mall, or shopping center.  Or, if you are like me and just plain lazy after working all day at a state hospital, you pick up your iPhone, head to an online site and let your fingers do the shopping!

Yes. This would be me after driving for more than 15 minutes.  I despise getting into the car these days!

To be honest, the only items I physically go shopping for are groceries and flowers.  Okay, my husband purchased the new fridge at an appliance store—but you catch my drift—right? The thought of putting underwear on to go shopping does not sit well with me these days.  I’m more comfortable at home in an old maxi dress-cum-nightie that doesn’t need panties or a bra. And then there’s the people.  In the parking lot. Entering and leaving the mall.  Walking around.  Asking dopey questions to sales assistants.  Standing on a line that never ends.  People pushing. And shoving.   I just want to be with my husband and my kids and their families.

Yes. I have very fond memories of shopping in NYC at my favorite store of all time—B. Altman.  Oh, how I loved that store. Then for the discount lover in my there was Mays on 34^th Street.  At Christmastime I would take the kids to Macy’s to see Santa Claus, but before getting to sit on Santa’s lap with a never-ending list of items wanted for Christmas, there was the Christmas Village to pass through.  Shopping was an experience!

B.Altman. THE only store I truly loved. It was always a pleasure to shop here. The store sold my taste in clothing and everything else!

When we moved to Long Island in 1962, malls were the new biggest thing.  South Shore Mall was my mother’s hang out.  The first purchase she ever made there was my First Holy Communion dress.  As more malls opened, the shopping was almost non-stop.  Nothing to do on a rainy summer day?  Go to the mall.  The day after Thanksgiving, the malls were jam packed.

The sad thing is now most of those malls have been abandoned.  I guess we’re fortunate to have King of Prussia Mall five minutes away, but I can’t stand going there.

Our country now has a number of abandoned malls. Why not turn them into affordable housing?

My solution?  Online shopping! It can be helpful if you know what your exact size is, if the return/exchange policy is consumer-friendly, and you know what you’re looking for.  If you are unsure, the best bet is to head to a store and try on clothing.  Or head to a makeup counter to test out various products before ordering. Or get a tape measure and start measuring your body’s curves!

For the most part, I’ve been successful.   And there are not successful transactions. And there was even one recently where I had to call my bank to stop the transaction because it was a fraudulent company.  So, let’s go and I start with some online shopping brands I like and some I don’t.

OGL Move.  I. LOVE. THIS, BRAND.  Hands down.  Even my husband loves the clothing I order from OGL Move. The built-in bra Brami tops are a godsend for we women who abhor wearing bras in the summer.  The level of happiness I have wearing these tops are off the charts.  Think about it. NO. BRA. OGL is a brand I took a chance with and the end result was extreme success and gratification.  The return/exchange policy is also stellar.  I had to make an exchange with a top due to sizing. They sent me a new top and told me to donate the one I didn’t need. That’s great service. Last summer when my son, Jake, got married in Santa Barbara, I took an OGL set with me and wore it constantly.   The clothing company is based in China and it takes about 5 days to a week to receive the goods.  I’m 5 feet 6 inches, current weight is 167. In bottoms—skirts I wear a size Medium. Pants a size Large.  Non-bra tops-Medium, Brami tops, Large.  My bust is 16C.

This striped set is my favorite. I have it in three colors.  The top has the built-in bra which is perfect for summer. The skirt is a linen-blend and has a smocked waist. I’ll be wearing it into winter with boots. And the Brami top is a dream!

The first OGL set I’ve ever purchased. Took it and wore it during my son’s wedding week in Santa Barbara and I’ve worn it constantly this summer!

The brand has fantastic sales. This dress was purchased at the end of last summer for USD 39.  And yes, it has the built in bra and is lined!

Another skirt from OGL and another Brami top!  And as I’ve aged, clothing that is comfortable is more appealing to me!

Quince, lately, gets mixed reviews.  How do I feel about the brand?  Well, it’s been hit or miss.  Even when I was thinner than I am now, the Medium stretch pants and dresses didn’t fit wonderfully, I had to size up to a large, and I was twenty pounds lighter than now.  However, the brand’s cotton fisherman knit sweaters are off-the-charts spectacular. They wash well, I air dry, they don’t lose shape. I have three—Navy, White, and Brown. I’m extremely pleased.   The linen?  The European Linen cropped pants are really nice. They wash and iron very well and I like the fit. I have two pair in Large and they run slightly big but the Medium would be way too tight around my gut and hips.  The shorts are “meh”—after a while they look sloppy but I am a fan of the linen tops—even if I do have to wear a bra!  The cashmere sweaters are good too. Not excellent but for the price, very good.

The brown cotton sweater from Quince. This pic was taken early Spring. I love this sweater so much.  All three retain shape after laundering. I air-dry only.  Incredibly comfortable. 

Quince cashmere sweater.  (worn with Gretchen Scott pants–another online purchase)  The sweater is fine.  Not the highest grade cashmere but nonetheless still decent quality for the price.

The European linen pants from Quince.  My conundrum is being between a M and a L.  I was hesitant to order the medium and went with the large.  Worn with a belt they don’t fall down. Worn without a belt and I’m constantly pulling them up. If I lose enough weight (surprise–a future blog post is on the way), I will have them tailored.

Amazon?  I can’t stand Jeff Bezos and his inflatable doll wife but, Amazon still has great deals.  I’ve recently ordered a couple of dresses for summer wear and am a fan. In one of the dresses, according to reviews, I ordered a Medium and it fits very well.  The other, a Large and am incredibly happy. The dress is lined and has pockets.  Amazon is so hit-or-miss. I think I’ve returned as much as I’ve purchased but Amazon has an incredibly user-friendly return policy and that’s what keeps me coming back.

I loved this dress so much that I ordered another one in Yellow flowers.  The fit is wonderful. The dress is lined and great for running errands and even for work. A classic shift!

This frock is also an Amazon purchase. The size is medium as opposed to the shift which was large.  The dress is comfy and forgiving.  I’m not crazy with the way those sandals look with it but once the heat cools off a bit, I’ll wear ballet flats.

The Fugly: With Amazon as well.   I have a sweater I ordered for this coming Autumn that’s in the package ready to be returned.  The photograph was completely different than what was delivered—and this has happened with Amazon quite a few times. The good thing is that the return policy is easy peasy and quick.

This pissed me off. The photo of the sweater is exactly what I was looking for. What came was completely different. I didn’t even take it out of the packaging. Back you go!

Il Makiage—don’t get me started on the bullshit advertising.  EVERY STINKING WOMAN IN THOSE ADS IS FILTERED UP THE WAZOO. I can’t believe that I ended up ordering the foundation which was not a good purchase. At first, it appeared to work well, it was good coverage for skin texture, etc.  But slowly, and in the long run, didn’t work. It was drying and ended up creeping into wrinkles. I had to really work the foundation to get it to look decent and it’s just not worth the work.  And trying to end the subscription that one is tricked into getting is horrific.  Somehow, I managed to cancel and never again.  Never. Again. Il Makiage foundation is the biggest grift of all time. And it’s a grift simply because the brand isn’t truthful when it comes to mature skin.  Mature skin changes as we age into older demographics.  And the fact the brand filters the mature, even young women, doesn’t sit well with either me or my skin.

Remember the show “The Office”?  This is Michael Scott’s girlfriend. In an Il Makiage ad. Look at the photo on the right. Overfiltered. I wouldn’t give this brand another cent of my money. I fell for the scam and it took numerous emails to cancel. Never again!

Wonderskin eyeliner pencil—Okay.  I shall admit something. Although I’m a huge fan of Revant gel eyeliner, I saw those online ads for Wonderskin pencils and took a chance at ordering.   Here’s the thing. The product is fantastic.  I’m not gonna lie. The black is black! And the product stays on your skin. All day without moving.  There’s a “but” and it’s a big “but”. You need a pencil sharpener to sharpen when the point wears down. And you need the Wonderskin sharpener because we all know that every brand makes a different sized pencil. In addition, after you sharpen the pencil, residue from the sharpener gets on your fingers and it takes some elbow grease to remove it.  And you are constantly sharpening the pencil which also means wasting product.  Revant gel liner isn’t as seriously pigmented as Wonderskin but it also stays put and has an automatic twist so that no product is wasted. If Wonderskin had that automatic thing—it would be a Holy Grail product. Instead, I use Revant for every day lining and Wonderskin for the night out.

This is a tough call.  Wonderskin looks automatic but you need a sharpener and the sharpener is horrible. The thing is Wonderskin’s pigmentation is steller.  Revant isn’t as deeply pigmented but it has an automatic tip that doesn’t need sharpening.  I have to go with Revant as being the better of the two because it doesn’t get messy.

Old Navy: Some years Old Navy has great stuff. Other years, absolute garbage.   This year there wasn’t much to offer but what I ordered was good.  It helps that Old Navy is a less-than-ten-minute drive from my house and I’ll stop by every now and then because the brand’s sizing is so inconsistent.  I love the wide leg linen pants.  And with those pants comes an elastic waistband so I can fit into a medium size.  I’ll order from ON only after I’ve gone to the store and tried items on.  I have a maxi dress I purchased in-store about a month ago before my back went out.  I’ve since ordered another one in an additional color because it was dirt cheap on sale.

I bought this dress on a deep sale at Old Navy because I have it in another color and love it. It’s a house dress. It’s an errand dress. I’ve even worn it to work. Very well-made!

Same dress–different color. Little tip here. You really need to know your size when it comes to Old Navy because the sizes are incredibly inconsistent. This dress is a medium but many of their size medium doesn’t fit me.

From last year. Old Navy wide-let linen pants and cotton shirt.  These have managed to look great for two summers in a row.  

Temu: Yes. I know and realize that Temu isn’t very “ethical”—but all that changed for me when our political administration, which is the most unethical administration in the history of America.  So don’t get all self-righteous on me for ordering from Temu.  Temu offers up-to-date styles for a very, very, large percentage of women who have to work and cannot afford brand name clothing.  I have had extremely good luck with my orders from Temu.  Inexpensive clothing that has lasted for years.  My favorite coats are from Temu.  A wool blend winter coat, which I receive tons of compliments when I wear it and my absolute favorite trench coat. It’s almost maxi length, which I love and looks so fantastic.  I paid maybe twenty-five bucks for each coat.

People can say what they want about TEMU. This winter coat was less than twenty-five bucks and this winter it will be going on its third winter.  I wore it last winter and the winter before in Paris. The amount of compliments I receive on this coat is pretty amazing.  The scarf here is also from Temu.

Another favorite coat from Temu. This trench coat is everything and more. I paid between 20 and 25 USD for it. This is also entering into it’s third season. The length is beautiful. And I love it so much I purchased a backup.  This will be coming to L.A. with me over Christmas!

What I ordered vs. what I received. The stock photo is on the left. What I received is what I’m wearing and I couldn’t be happier. This is that frock that can be worn to a nice evening to dinner. And, get this, I wore it to work and received a ton of compliments. This dress launders beautifully, irons and steams beautifully and is very well made . I think I paid 17 USD for it. I’m wearing a strapless bra with it.

Random notes:  Because I know my size with certain brands, I’m very confident when I order from Lilly Pulitzer.  I have many dresses from the brand that have all been purchased on deep sale.  Personally, I would rather order online than going into the store at KOP mail.   In addition, I purchased a dress from Tuckernuck. I love the madras plaid of the dress but I’m not over-the-moon crazy about the dress–it’s too long in length and kind of tight across the bust.  I plan on having it tailored for next summer.  Would I order from Tuckernuck again?  No. I think the brand is way overpriced.

One of my many Lilly Pulitzer Maxi dresses. I honestly love the brand for summer clothing. It’s a bit too twee for me for winter though.

Here’s the Tuckernuck dress. There’s maxi dresses and then there’s maxi dresses. This is too long. I prefer a maxi that flows.

And as I write this blog post, I’m wearing this Lilly Pulitzer dress with a built-in bra. I LOVE THIS DRESS AND HAVE HAD IT FOR YEARS!  It’s come to Theoule-sur-Mer for years–the perfect dress for traipsing around the Cote d’Azur. I wear it to work. I wear it as a house dress. 

Nordstrom Anniversary Sale: It used to be great. Then influencers got a hold of it. Then Nordstrom drank influencer Kool-Aid and the sale sucks. I usually try to find one or two items that I feel would be good for the coming winter and this time around I did find two items.

The two pics on the left are stock photos from the Nordstrom site. The two on the right are me wearing the clothes. I ordered an oversized cotton sweater. I’m pleased as punch with it because it’ll be a staple to wear with leggings.  The skirt, I was on the fence about but when I received it, I loved it.  It’s very boho flowy with an elastic waist band in the back and a zipper on the side. I have brown suede booties that will be perfect with this.

Shoes:  Ahhh. Yes. Once upon a time I loved the process of going to the store, having my foot measured and buying footwear in person. Now I only buy in person when I’m in France.  Two brands I can safely purchase online are C. Paravano and G.H. Bass because I love my Weejuns.  Other than those two brands, I have enough shoes to last me until I’m in my 90’s.

G.H. Bass had a sale. You know what that means. My newest loafers for Fall and Winter.  Yes. It’s sad to come to terms with the fact you can’t wear heels anymore. But comfort and not being at risk for falls are more important!

Purchased last year, I can’t wait for Winter to arrive so I can wear these again! C. Paravano has a website but I chose to purchase through eBay because the deals are better.  Much better!

Makeup:  Makeup is that thing where you really need to see the product first.  And I am not a fan of going into an actual store to purchase makeup. I will say, the Ulta near me is great but they don’t carry some of the cosmetics I like such as Danessa Myricks.  Sephora carries Danessa and I can’t stand Sephora.  However, I have gone into the store to check out her products before ordering online.  I would much rather order makeup on line.

Overall, I’m a fan of Danessa Myricks. I have many of her products but the photos didn’t upload.

As a huge fan of “Geek Out of Water” on You Tube, Shelly gives great makeup reviews for the mature demographic and she recently went into skincare. Her products are excellent!   Typology is another brand that I am very fond of as is Dermtlgy.

I have to say, Live Tinted is possibly my new favorite. The primer and skin tint are 100 percent fantastic.  I’m almost done with the products and now that Ulta is selling them, I will make an effort to go buy in person.

Do I miss going shopping in person?  Not really.  Maybe it is the fact I’m now old.  I just can’t stand the process and would rather just go for a walk.  Shopping used to be special. Now it’s special when I’m in Paris during the holiday season or back in New York City, my old stomping grounds.  It’s even fun when I’m in Cincinnati with Oona. I can spoil my grandsons.  And at Christmas I’ll be heading out to Los Angeles where I can spoil my newest grandson.  But generally speaking, I don’t miss shopping in person.

I will, however, give you a word of advice: unfollow any influencer who tells you to comment a certain word and they will send you a link to products.  They are grifters. They don’t give two shits how any article of clothing or any item will suffice to your needs. It is all about money.  I have unfollowed 99.9 percent of influencers: wig influencers especially.  You honestly don’t need all that stuff.

What say you?  (Did I really write that?  Yes. I did!)  Do you shop online more these days? Do you miss those trips to the mall?  Are you a fan of small business?  Has your shopping habits changed as you’ve aged?  Spill the tea!

For what its worth, I have a draft regarding shoes in my blog’s drafts.  I was all ready to post with pictures but something happened.

My poor little heels.  All donated. Never to be worn again!

It wasn’t pretty.

But first, please allow me to backtrack a little.  Carpeting is the bane of my existence. I hate it. It is dirty.  It is filled with dust mites and after a while, carpeting looks shitty.  I said it. It. Looks. Shitty. And so, we had quite a bit of carpeting replaced with hardwood.

Ugh. I’m so glad we got rid of this.

First off, we had the banisters on the stairs painted white and black.  I love the vibe.

First things first.  The stair railings look so much better now.

Then it was time to have the stairway from the entrance to the first floor made nice by getting rid of the carpeting and replaced with hardwood.  I love the vibe.

The process. It looks beautiful.

I love our stairs!

At the same time, we had the carpeting in the living room replaced with hardwood.  It turned out lovely and we both love the vibe.

I feel like I’m back in NYC with the hardwood in the living room…

It makes my heart happy!

Yes. It was a mess for a few days because all the furniture had to be moved but it was no big deal. My husband paid a couple of teenaged boys down the street and all was well.

Furniture had to be moved but it was so worth the trouble!

Then it happened.  The disaster.

We have a fridge and the fridge has an ice maker and water faucet. You know. Modern conveniences.  We’ve had the fridge since we moved here 13 years ago.   My husband noticed a puddle of water that appeared to be oozing from the bottom of our fridge.  He cleaned it up.  Shortly thereafter, another puddle appeared.  In the meantime, he figured the fridge had passed away and it was time to buy a new one and so he did.  He also called up our homeowner’s insurance to see if there was any damage from the leak.

This is similar to what our fridge leak looked like. I didn’t take a pic–this is from the internet.

Well, my friends, that leak must have started quite some time ago because the leak made its way down to the little storage room (that is fixed to house another bathroom but we haven’t gotten around to it so it is used for storage).   A section of the ceiling had to be ripped out.  The other odd thing is I was doing laundry a few weeks back and I heard dripping from the walls.  My husband said it was the house noises but looking back–I can bet it was the fridge leaking.

Before and after. It’s weird because the after photo has glare that makes it look like there’s damage but it isn’t. It was the glare from my camera and the lights.

Then the fridge had to be moved.  In the meantime, my husband paid for the new fridge and he paused the delivery—which was a good thing.  The water damage was worse than we thought.  Hardwood in the kitchen had to be ripped out.  The flooring in the pantry had to be ripped out.

The fridge was moved and is no longer leaking.  That’s a portion of the floor that was ripped up. It’s such a fine view from the sunroom.

Special industrial -sized machines to soak up the water had to be hooked up in both our kitchen and storage room.

It took a week-and-a-half of constant din from the noise. It didn’t bother me because A. I grew up in a noisy  house and B. I was used to the low-flying planes landing at both LaGuardia and JFK.

These machines, although smaller, were also downstairs.

Water water everywhere and not a drop to spare!

The house is now a mess.  The hardwood in the living room and stairs still look great but the painter has to return to take out the railing that is screwed into the wall so that the new fridge can have room to be delivered.

Three weeks later, our kitchen remains a disaster.  I am not a happy camper.  But things could have been worse, I guess.  And by the way, that saying annoys me. Yeah. I am fully aware that things could be worse.  However, I’m getting too old to pump sunshine up my ass and I just want this done. Yes. I sound like a cranky old lady and in this regard, I am. But–shit happens and I am well-aware of that!

I think this is what bothers me the most. The bottom shelves of the pantry had to be cleared and now it is all on the counter.

The other good thing about this is that because we’re heading out to L.A. for Christmas, we decided to not go to France this summer.  Could you imagine if this happened while we were in France?  The damage would have been a lot worse.

I was fine with the mess from laying down the living room floor because it was not about damage.  But damage is a whole ‘nuther story!

You know, my parents had the same fridge for decades.  From the late 1950’s when we moved from Ozone Park in Queens out to Long Island, that fridge was nothing special. It had no water dispenser nor did it make ice. We made ice in the freezer in ice cube trays. Then we moved within our town to a larger house and my parents purchased a larger fridge. Avocado green.  The other fridge went into the garage for the overflow of food.  The green fridge was nothing special either.  We continued to make ice cubes in ice cube trays. We also continued to get water from the kitchen faucet.  And we never, ever experienced fridge leaks.

The avocado fridge. Nothing special. Doesn’t make water and ice is made in trays.  We need to have more appliances like this these days!

Hmmmmm. Apparently one can still purchase these trays. Remember the days of using these?

Anyway, that’s it. That is why I haven’t written my post about shoes.  I will give you a hint though.  I can no longer wear heels.  It has nothing to do with health reasons but has everything to do with comfort.  And I am not wearing ugly shoes.  Stay tuned!

At least the sunroom still looks good–even with the mat that was under the fridge in the way!

Crazy at it might seem, the subject matter has been rolling around in the empty space between my ears for a while now.  Not a long while but just about as long as I switched out my winter clothing for the lighter ones.

Yes. I think.  Therefore I am (but not the brightest bulb in the house)

‘Tis an odd thing, it is.  But I’ve changed my mindset about clothing. It could be a mixture of age, a changing body, not working in corporate anymore and the ultimate desire to be comfortable; and this mélange of reasons have me questioning fashion as we know it.

I’ve been through corporate, unemployment, back to corporate, back to unemployment and for almost three years, I’ve been working at a state hospital where the lack of dress code has been mind-boggling.

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My former corporate attire. I can’t even fit this over my thighs anymore.  Do I miss dressing like this?  Well, not really.  I’m all about comfort now!

In the past I’ve shared some pretty nice ensembles with you.  My favorite outfits for winter. Summer. Travel. But lacking in the at-home wear because at home wear is usually a pair of Old Navy pajamas that I refer to as “lounge wear”.  But we all know what lounge wear is anyway.  Am I right?

These have gone from being called “pajamas” into now being named “At Home”  clothing and “Loungewear”.  And no, I will never wear this ensemble at the airport nor on a plane because, thruthfully, they are pajamas!

My current work wardrobe consists of various pairs of pants with sweaters or tee shirts and in the summer shirts with built-in bras.  The change was gradual.  When I started, I wore dresses and skirts. And when I discovered I was the only one dressing that way, my wardrobe started to lean more to, not business casual, but casual casual.   Summer is an exception because the A/C never works in my office so I stick to sundresses and maxi dresses.

A current work outfit when I feel like REALLY dressing up these days!

And here’s the thing.  My body has changed.  If you peruse the internet and printed articles in magazines, you’ll read all about women going through menopause and how their bodies have changed.   Well, me, being the late bloomer, I always have been, didn’t go through those body changes until well after menopause.  My cups runneth over with side boobage.   My belly started to really belly.  In fact, my belly has a life of her own.  My thighs got flabbier. My turkey neck decided to turn into a folding pile of crepe paper.  And my arms they got a bit flabby too.

Well, MY cups runneth over with side boobage.  And a belly.  And flabbier thighs. And……

Allow me to admit that my propensity for laziness is also at fault here because I don’t exercise.  I’m at a desk.  At a computer. All day.  I come home and want to relax.  When I get depressed, my lazy nature becomes epic.  When I am not depressed, my laziness is still lazy.  I refuse to pay for a gym membership because I’ll go for a week then will stop.  Besides—gyms smell—and I will die on that hill.   I’ve said it before and will continue to say it: when I lived in NYC, I was in the best shape of my life.  I walked everywhere.  And the walking did a world of wonders for my body and mind.

This would be me after I return home from work. I miss active me.

The suburbs are different.  I abhor walking around here.  It is extremely boring. And I will leave it at that because if you don’t have anything nice to say…………….

And comfort.   I want to be comfortable these days. No tight waistbands digging into my gut.  No constantly adjusting falling bra straps.  No more heels.  I just cannot go long periods wearing them anymore.  But the thing is, I still want to look good. I want to wear clothing that checks the comfort boxes and style (as a noun not as a verb) boxes.  In addition, I do not want to be that delusional older woman who is dressing to be her 16-year-old self again.

So, after researching and going through tubs of clothing in the garage, I found the perfect solution.  Linen, linen-adjacent, cotton and fabrics that are light enough for the warmer months but can be layered for the colder months.  Yeah.  I also want a three-season wardrobe.  Lugging clothing up and down stairs for storage is exhausting albeit the only exercise I get.

It IS about comfort these days. I wore this to NYC two weeks ago. Comfortable and simple but stylish.  Truth be told I haven’t worn this since because the weather decided to step back into winter!

I took a very realistic look at my clothing.  Especially those in the tubs.  Many of which did not fit anymore but I was holding onto them like Miss Havesham was holding on to her lost love memories. The reality was those clothes will most likely never fit me again—they have been hidden away for years.  And I donated them. I can’t deal with reselling them because I can’t deal with people who would ever want a refund.  Donating is my groove.

In a weird way, I love Miss Havisham. She’s looking back at long-lost love and hoping it’ll return.  I’m no longer looking back at long-lost sizing from my old clothing.  It ain’t returning!

Then I assessed what kinds of clothing I did like. Truth be told, I liked those linen and linen-blend wide legged pants I have had but barely wore.  I tried them on.  They looked good.  Very good.  I liked the elastic waistband. It stretched.  Yeah, my belly didn’t shrink but it didn’t look that bad with the right clothes.  In fact, from the front I appear leaner than from the side view!  Tops came next.  I love an airy, oversized button down, gauzy/linen shirt—but my tits get in the way of buttoning without bunching.  I changed bras.  Instead of a padded bra, I took my light, non-padded, bralettes out of hibernation.  Suddenly the shirts looked much better.

These Old Navy Pants and top from about three years ago were rarely worn. I’m glad I held on because now, I love them.   The only thing with Old Navy, as well as other brands is inconsistant sizing.  

I did the tuck with other shirts and I like the way it looks.  I purchased a few items from Quince and some from OGL Move.  OGL Move offers tops with built-in bras. Who wouldn’t love that?

I purchased this dress on a deep sale last summer from OGL.  It’s fully lined AND the pockets have zippers, making this a perfect dress to go shopping and stick your money or bank cards in the zippered pockets.  The pockets run deep so car keys will fit in there too.  My belly stick outs but at this point in my life, I don’t care. It is what it is.

Don’t get me wrong.  I still have my summer maxi dresses from Lilly Pulitzer and more dresses.

One of my maxi dresses from Lilly Pulitzer, I wore this to my son and daughter-in-law’s rehearsal dinner last August.

I love the high neckline on this Lilly dress because it hides my turkey neck.  I eagerly look forward to the weather warming up so I can wear this and I can skip shaving my legs!

And I still have this madras dress waiting for the heat to arrive. 

My favorite summer ensemble is a skirt and top with built-in bra that I practically lived in last summer and I purchased another one for this year.  I can wear them well into autumn with a blazer or sweater.

Shoes?  My ballet flats have served me well over the years and continue to do so.  Over the winter I discovered another brand of flat, pointy-toed shoes—C. Paravano and one can get them on eBay for 1/3 the price.  The shoes fit my feet well. And are great for spring and autumn.  Once the weather gets hot, my Rondini sandals will be my everyday shoes.

I practically live in my Rondini sandals during the summer. But I have to say, my new favorite shoe brand is C. Paravano.  The shoes are incredibly comfortable!

Let me show you how these most comfortable items look on me:

Below is the OGL Move two-piece skirt and Brami top.  What I absolutely love about OGL is that you have a choice for sizing in the brand’s two-piece sets.  For the Brami tops with the built-in bra, I wear a Medium but for my bottoms, I wear a Large.  I will tell you, though, that for this particular set, there isn’t a huge difference between the M and L for the skirt. In the first two pics I’m wearing a Medium skirt and the far right a Large. It’s mostly that the length is longer in the large.

These sets by OGL are wonderful. I wore this outfit constantly last summer.

Here it is in black. M top, L skirt.   I freaking LOVE this outfit!

OGL has travel pant sets as well, Sort of like sweatshirt material, but not. I have it in black (below) and ordered another one in brown.  The comfort level is astounding!  These are GREAT for travel.  The pants are a perfect length. In fall, you can layer with a cardigan or light jacket.

Here’s the OGL travel set. Pants are a size L. Top a Medium.  At first I ordered a Large top buy the armholes were incredibly huge. I  am donating the large top, along with other clothing that doesn’t fit me (because the clothes are too small) to the women patients at the hospital. They need clothing for when they are released to community housing.

Bottoms are Old Navy. Size Medium. I find these wide-leg pants have generous sizing.  The top is from Quince. I’m enjoying these sleeveless linen tops because they are loose but not sloppy looking.

More Old Navy Pants from a few years back that went unworn and Quince top. I like this top better tucked. It looks neater.  The Quince tops are all large. Some of Quince’s tops tend to run on the smaller side.

Quince pants are a different story.  I have two pair of the European Linen pants pictured below. Navy and white.  I ordered Large and they are slightly loose around the waist and backside.  It’s apparent that I’m in between sizes with Quince as far as pants are concerned.  I’ll elaborate further a bit down in the post.

This top is also by Quince. It’s the cropped linen shirt.  I love this length with higher-waisted bottoms.  It’s airy and extermely comfortable.  The bottoms are the 100% European Linen Pants. The length falls just above the ankles and I love that length.

Here’s the white pants. In first photo I am wearing the pants with an Old Navy cropped linen-blend top from a few years ago. I belted with a suede ribbon belt from Gretchen Scott–also from a few years ago.  Second pic wearing with the Linen crop top from Quince and in the third Quince’s Linen tank. I’m not crazy about how the tank top looks with this–it looks sloppy. The top would look much better with my J. Crew pixie pants.

Here’s the thing about Quince’s sizing. I decided to order these wide-leg, drawstring linen pants in Medium.  They were too tight around the waist and hips.  The remedy?  I washed them, no dryer–and stretched the waist and hips. That’s the great thing about linen. It can be stretched out if need be.  I stretched them out, ironed them and now they fit fine.  

Sizing can be daunting.  Bodies change as we age–no doubt about it. Many of us become softer and wider and that’s fine.  The issue lies in finding the right fit.  Being in between sizes can be more daunting but the question remains: Would you rather have a snug size or a larger size?  For me, in bottoms, the larger size is far more important because comfort is first. Don’t get me wrong–I don’t want to be swimming in bottoms or running the chance of my pants falling down. I still want to look nice but comfortable without looking frumpy.  And wrinkles in clothes, especially linen are fine. I like my clothing the way I like my face–wrinkled!

This outfit is a favorite.  Old Navy pants, the Medium is very body-friendly. Very generous sizing. The shirt? Purchased in France last summer from H & M. I love the way this looks. Perfect for work or going out. 

One thing I want to add about the shirt pictured above. For years I didn’t feel comfortable wearing button-down shirts.  The chest area always buckled because of my bra and even with larger sizing, the shirts were too stiff or just ..I dunno, just not right.  This shirt from H & M changed me.  It’s oversized but not ridiculously so. The fabric is so lightweight and drapes so well over the chest area–there is no buckling at all. It is a pleasure to wear.

This ensemble will get me from now until late autumn. It is truly three-season.  The cotton cashmere crew neck sweater is from Quince. Size Large and the fit is stellar.  The pants were on sale at Gretchen Scott designs.  I love the pattern and with ballet flats looks so casual chic!

Something about Gretchen Scott designs. Her gripeless pull-on pants are fantastic. I have a few pair going back and the fit is very generous. The pants pictured are a medium. The length hits at the ankle. The pants are extremely comfortable and wash nicely.  The odd thing about this brand is I never see any reviews and I can’t understand why  The other thing about Gretchen Scott is the pricing.  I think, for the most part, the clothing is expensive but the sales are phenomenal.

Lastly, shorts.  i will wear a maxi dress before I don a pair of shorts. However, sometimes here in the Northeast/Mid-Atlantic area, July, August, and September are humid. VERY humid. And hot. That’s where the shorts come in. I’m wearing the tan shorts with a vest and the black ones with a cropped top. Both are higher-waisted and even though the same size, I like the way the black pair fits better.

My legs are heavier and now resemble crepe paper. I need to fake tan because I can’t stand my fish-belly hued legs.  Both of these shorts are from Quince. size Large.  They will be prefect for heading to the beach or running errands during the summer. In fact, I will most likely wear them to work because the hospital has the A/C on in winter and the heat in summer. I kid you not.

We’re always changing, aren’t we?  My style will always be very basic and classic but these days I’ve become less fussy and just want to reach for comfort.  What say you?  ( I can’t believe I just wrote that–that’s such an old-person thing to say).  Are you into comfort these days?  Are you more of a fashionista?  I’m very curious!

If you may recall, last year for my 70^th birthday, my kids treated us to a weekend at the Chelsea Hotel in NYC—complete with all meals out and a Broadway Play. It was, hands down, the greatest weekend ever!  If you hadn’t read it, here’s a link:  My 70^th Birthday in NYC.

This year, my husband took me into the City for my 71^st birthday and I’m thinking it may be a new tradition.

We started out early Saturday morning.  The sun was with us but it was a bit on the cooler side. I packed very lightly—wore linen pants and a shirt (which would suffice for Sunday as well) and a black dress for our dinner at Le Coucou in Soho. Check in time at the hotel (more about that in a little bit) was 4:00 PM and so we decided to drive up to Nyack to visit Vincent’s maternal grandfather’s grave.

Linen blend pants from last year or the year before–Old Navy. The shirt? H & M in France. Last year. I love it.

Comfortable shoes, vintage LV bag and a duffle are all I needed. This outfit would suffice for Sunday as well!

In the car and we’re off!

The drive was incredibly pleasant.  No traffic—which is rare on a Saturday.

Luckily, we didn’t even have to cross the GW!  We headed straight for the Palisades!

We followed our route along the Palisades up to the exit in New York that would lead us to, quite possibly, one of the most charming towns in the Hudson Valley—Nyack!  Vincent’s grandfather moved there after WW2.  He had a job doing illustrations for various companies and he was quite happy.  He lived in a rather large house and Vincent, his mother, and his sister lived there for a couple of years after his parents split.   Although Vincent doesn’t have many memories of that time, the ones he does have are good ones.  He loved the house and loved living in the town. It’s an artsy community and I could easily see us living there—except the 2026 housing prices are a lot pricier than when Vincent was a child.

How beautiful is this old house?  It’s where Vincent’s grandfather lived after he arrived in the States and Vincent lived here for a couple of years as a very young child!

A simple headstone for a not-so-simple man.  Andre Girard was an artist and founded CARTE during WW2–he worked for the resistance. Click his name to read more about him.

As the day went on, the weather became wonderfully warmer.  That spring day when the temperature isn’t hot yet but you are well-aware that winter has bid adieu.   I suggested that we take the Tappan Zee bridge instead of the George Washington because:

The Tappan Zee bridge from a distance looks like a cluster of sails–it is so freaking beautiful!

A. Bridge traffic on the GW is always a pain.  B. The Tap is cheaper.  C.  The drive into the City from the Tap is more fun.  It has been decades since I was on this bridge and it is a beautiful drive across the Hudson.  At some point it was practically rebuilt because when I was growing up, it didn’t look as grand as it is now.

This is one gorgeous bridge!

As we made our way into the city, we passed Tarrytown and Sleepy Hollow and parts of the Bronx that brought fond memories to me.  And even as we drove downtown, traffic wasn’t bad.

My husband did a thing. To make our way downtown even less traffic-ridden, we drove through the piers!  Check this Norweigan dinghy out!  It was massive!

We also drove by some sort of filming going on. A movie?  TV show? Commercial? Narcissistic Influencer?

This time around we stayed at the Renaissance Hotel, part of the Marriott chain.  It was very different than the Hotel Chelsea.   This is the hotel where my son, Jake, stays when he’s in New York on business.  My daughter Oona stays there on business trips as well.  But before I go into my mini-review of our stay at the hotel, I have to tell you—we got street parking three blocks away.  Street Parking.  Note:  If you are driving into New York City for a weekend, free parking is available in residential areas on Saturday and Sunday.  And it saves a good amount of money!

The Marriott Renaissance in Chelsea.  (I give photo credit to TripAdvisor because I didn’t take a photo)

Okay. Back to the hotel.  Now, when my husband made the reservation, there may have been a “lost in translation” moment because he apparently reserved a single room. Not a big deal nor a deal breaker because the bed was big enough for the two of us.

So, we headed up to the room and at first glance, it was really nice. Very streamlined.  Very monochromatic.  The view was incredible! For me, it was all about the view.   And as we looked around, we both noticed the lack of bright lighting.  Look—I’m not wanting lights so bright that I need sunglasses, and I realize that subdued lighting can be soothing.  However, there comes a point in one’s aging life that you need slightly brighter light to function! Meaning, to see.  Honestly, the hotels in Paris have brighter lighting.

Check out that view–huh?  Now THAT’S a view I can live with–even if only for a weekend!

One thing about Marriott Hotels–the beds are always incredibly comfortable.  And this was no exception. Total comfort and even though a single room, the bed was large enough for the two of us!

Then there was the bathroom.  Very nice.  But when I saw only a shower and no bathtub I was slightly put off.  Not put off enough to create a “moment” because I was just grateful and happy to even be back in New York.   Then I looked around some more.  There were no little essentials such as little body lotions or shower caps or Q-tips.  Granted, there was body gel and shampoo attached to a wall shelf in the shower stall but—no shower cap when you have a shower and no bathtub? I thought for the price of a hotel in NYC, that was downright cheap.

What can I say?  The bathroom was on the small side, no bathtub but no extras.  Do your duty and get off the throne

Looking around some more, I opened the closet and realized there were no robes. What is this?  A roadside inn? I love hotel robes. After a shower or, preferably, bath, the robe is such a cozy and luxurious item to wrap your body in and they make you feel a bit special—like at a spa.  And because Vincent never travels without it, he brought Champagne from home for our before-dinner aperitif.  We found a small ice bucket and I called the front desk to see where on our floor the ice machine was.  There was no ice machine and I was told someone would come to our room with said ice.  In the meantime, my husband left his dinner jacket in the car so he went off to get it.

Yes. I like my hotels to have robes so I can be treated as though I am at a spa. No Robe? No spa queen!

A couple of minutes later, one of the staffers arrived with my ice. In a thin plastic bag.  I tipped a five and he was incredibly appreciative (and I’m thinking—doesn’t every tip these guys?).   So off I went to place the large bottle of Champagne into the little ice bucket and proceeded to fill it with the large amount of ice.  I had to laugh because in my extreme clumsiness, I kept dropping ice cubes on the floor then as I picked them up, more ice would fall from the bag.  In the end—the bottle was firmly ensconced in a bed of ice and chilled beautifully!

Yeah. My biggest fear was that my clumsiness would have the ice melting because my aim into the ice bucket was that bad!

Allow me to say this—If we were younger, let’s say between our twenties through forties, we would have gotten dressed for dinner, and at the hours preceding sour journey to dinner, we would have hopped or skipped or gaily sprinted to a nearby bar for our aperitif. If the bar was crowded—who cares? Noisy?  Like music to my younger ears. But now, we’re older and aged out of that scene.

Honestly, a crowd of twenty-five people looks this big to me these days!

Aperitif time for us was quiet time in the hotel room, before getting dressed for dinner.  Relaxing in front of the view from the window and having conversation that allowed us to hear what we were saying to each other.  And the older I get, the more I like those times.

Our conversation centered around the price of New York hotel rooms vs. Paris hotel rooms.  Paris won because of better pricing and bathroom amenities.  Oh yeah, and robes and slippers. Yes. This is what old people do. They compare stuff. From groceries to hotels to anything that pops into the still functioning mind!

We got dressed, ordered an Uber to take us down to Le Coucou and enjoyed the ride through the Village down to Soho.  The first time either of us were at Le Coucou was my birthday one year ago and the dinner was spectacular.  This year, it was just as good.

Dressed and ready to go.  I don’t know why I made that face but I love the black dress!  My husband cuts quite the suave figure!

All dressed up with a hanging bra strap. Now that’s classy!

The only “con” so to speak was the price of a bottle of wine.  According to my personal French Sommelier, aka, my husband, the wine was ridiculously overpriced so we went with a glass of wine instead.  It was good too because I didn’t get acid reflux from it!

This is a pretty pricey wine list but by the glass, it’s fine!

The food. Wow. The food was incredible. I started off with quail and it was wonderfully crispy and delicious.  Vincent had the leeks with hazelnuts, which he enjoyed but after seeing my quail, he regretted his choice.

The quail was excellent. I don’t know how the chef did this!

I’m a fan of leeks. And of hazelnuts. And Vincent enjoyed this but was regretful for not ordering the quail. And I did NOT let him have a taste of mine!

Main plate?  He had his usual filet mignon while I had sweetbreads.   I’m telling you, if you find yourself in NYC, having dinner at Le Coucou, by all means, try the sweetbreads.  They were crisp on the outside, creamy on the inside and I was in food heaven!  The sauce was so outstanding and I couldn’t stop raving about it.  It was that good.  Finally, the Matre’d gifted me with a plastic container of this liquid gold.  It is now resting in our fridge and I’m figuring out how to duplicate it.

The meat was melt-in-your-mouth and the bonus was bone marrow. Vincent did not give me a taste of the bone marrow!

My sweetbreads were “offally” delicious!

In fact, the sauce was so incredible that as I write this post, I am preparing to make sweetbreads and figure out the sauce for dinner tonight!

Dessert was spot on too.  I had the Marjolaine and it was a perfect portion.  Vincent had the Ile Flotante which, he loved but did manage to say that mine was better.  He’s such a nice man!

What a nice birthday surprise! And that one candle made me feel so youthful! Vincent’s favorite dessert was spot on!

We Ubered back to the hotel for a good night’s sleep because it would be a busy Sunday.  Roman would come to meet us for brunch then we would all head to the Museum of Modern Art.

The night sky illuminated by the buildings–a hint of a fog afar. NYC at night is astounding!

Ok! Sunday morning.  Vincent, who is as obsessed with parking spaces as I am, decided to walk the three blocks to our car and look for a spot closer to the hotel.  Trust me this is normal behavior for any human being who has lived in a city.   And didn’t he manage to snag one right in front of the hotel! Now that’s lucky! That is one of the successes of life!

Roman met us and we really didn’t have any set plans on where to have brunch.  We approached the in-house restaurant at the hotel to see if they had space for three.  Instead of charging our room, I inquired about just paying as we had taken care of the bill.  I was told brunch was a buffet and the cost was $48 per person.   Sorry not sorry.  My son was treating us and that price was absolutely insane—especially for a buffet.

Then Roman remembered a sports bar/pub down the street.  Smithfield Hall.  When Jake is in town he and Roman often go there.  And, there was an important soccer aka “fewtbawl” game that both guys wanted to watch and I was all about it.

Smithfield Hall is that neighborhood bar/pub everyone needs. At 11:00 AM, the place had a great crowd.  TV screens lined the back bar and people were sitting enjoying lager, food, and the game!   Roman had the Irish Breakfast and was very fond of the blood sausage.  I figured, what the hell, and went for the breakfast burger.  A burger topped with cheese, bacon and an egg.  It was so juicy that I had to eat it with a knife and fork.  The coffee was excellent—nice and so strong it would put hair on your chest!  Vincent ate most of my fries.

TV screens lined the entire back of the bar area. No time for pics during an intense football game!

Then it was off for the drive up to midtown to the museum.  There’s a parking lot directly across from MOMA which was practicality at its best.   A typical Sunday in the City means a crowded museum.  MOMA handles the crowds so efficiently.  The wait to get in was less than five minutes.  Now, MOMA isn’t my favorite museum because I prefer a more classical form of art; however, the museum houses two of Jacques-Henri Lartigue’s photographs.  It was fun to see them.  Then we made our way to the Marcel Deschamps exhibit which was quite interesting.

Photos for MOMA a gift from Vincent’s grandfather!

And a proud grandson!

More wandering around and admiring some of the works.  In the meantime, the crowds grew and it was time to leave. These days, I just can’t deal with crowds. It’s difficult to figure out because when I was younger, I was a very social butterfly.  Now I am more of a misanthropic cockroach!  We did pick up a book with Vincent’s grandfather’s photos which was nice. I picked up a couple of notebooks and we were back out on the street.

Entrance to the Marcel Deschamps exhibit. It was a pretty big deal.

Picked up some goodies!

My favorite modern art?  The Sabrett Hot Dog umbrellas.  My favorite hot dogs? NYC dirty water hot dogs. True culinary art!

I think traveling, whether domestic or internationally is a completely different mindset for many of us as we age.  What are your thoughts on this?

We exited the museum and Roman headed for the subway as we headed to retrieve the car.  It was a wonderful weekend!

And the rain held off until we got in the car to go home. Thank you Mother Nature!

A weekend in the City is always a good thing—whether a special occasion or a “just because” weekend.  Hope Birthday 2027 is as enjoyable!

As I write this, it is almost two weeks into daylight savings time 2026.  My body is getting used to the fact I need another hour’s sleep because I keep waking up at the old 5:00 AM to get ready for work as opposed to the new 5:00 AM.   So basically, I’m waking up at 4:00 AM—an hour earlier, and I can’t get back to sleep.  Cabish?

Thank God for makeup or else this is what I would look like all day due to time change tiredness!

It’s also the time of day when the sun begins a slower descent; reminding us that the days are beginning to get longer.  And, instead of the dark afternoon shadows, the sun is shining in an almost blindingly manner after 5:30 PM.

and the sun sets later and later and later until that first day of summer.

Two weeks ago, we experienced “Fake Spring”.  Those teaser days just before the exit of winter—which makes me wonder, will winter leave us with a quiet Irish exit, or will the coldest season leave us by dropping a wintery mix which some will see as a setback.  The rage bait, if you will, of Mother Nature.

Dear Mother Nature.   I know you are angry due to climate change–so am I, but don’t punish us with teaser days!

The past week has brought humanity out from hibernation. I think because the new season is full of frustration from being pent up indoors—baseball has opening day.  Extracurricular sports are played outside. People are planning their annual plantings for lawns and patios.  More people are spotted, weather temp regardless, in shorts and flip-flops (which I personally save for summer) Much to my chagrin, traffic on the road has gotten worse as well.  Men, thinking they are the greatest things since restaurant-style tortilla chips are taking part in topless afternoon runs.  Keep the shirt on fella.  Your hairy gut is proof that tee shirts were made for you.  Young mothers out with babies in strollers.  School children getting off the bus with a hop to their step and laughing because they know that homework might wait until later.  It isn’t quite yet the gardening moment despite buying bulbs and plantings and the like, but it’s just nice to be outdoors.

Traffic going home from work has increased since winter.  Wait till summer when the Shore traffic hits.  I do not like this.

Even me, as lazy as I am, weather permitting, leave the hospital during lunch to take a stroll around the campus.  We’re on the edge of a county park filled with streams and brooks and it’s just lovely.  My warm-weather walks during lunch are something I look forward to when the cold, windy, biting weather leaves and the warmth of the sun gets closer.   It is my me time.  To be alone. To not have to talk to anyone nor hear anyone.  The sounds I hear are the wheels of bikes on the pavement, the breathing of runners who look miserable while being healthier, and the sounds of birds rustling in soon-to-be leavy trees. Sadly, the past few days have been too windy, and my eyes are incredibly sensitive, so I’ve had to stay in.

I LOVE my walks around the hospital campus.  Sadly, I had only two days to do so since Spring arrived.  And the forecast this week is rain!

And I take advantage of this weather.  For now.  Because I know that next week the Fahrenheit will plummet to the thirties, it could snow or worse—a wintery mix could be bestowed upon us.

In welcoming this new season, we finally took the Christmas trees down, and, when it gets a bit warmer, will tackle the garage.  Spring cleaning.  Purging.  Getting rid of accumulated stuff we haven’t needed for years.  Stuff that I asked the kids if they wanted and, with clear and concise answers, all said “NO” (You know as soon as the stuff is gone, they will be asking “You know that……. from years ago—do you still have it?)

Our next project is purging the garage.  Clothes that no longer fit.  Old holiday stuff that has seen better days.  Suitcases we don’t use.  So much stuff.  We will probably get a junk collector to help us!

But something in my person has shifted.  Could it be I’ve aged out of spring and summer?  Is it possible, I no longer care and want only late autumn and winter back—all year?

With my recent semi-annual skin check, and the stress that goes along with it, I just want to be healthy.  The dermatologist gave me an “A-Okay” for the next six months. But this year, I don’t want to spend hours upon hours in the sun.  I don’t care about lolling about on a blanket at the beach every weekend (But I do care about having a fake tan.  I love tanned legs)—without sounding hypocritical, I do look forward to beaching time this summer but not obsessively.

Not to be a hypocrite but, I still look forward to going to the beach but more to read and less to bake.

Maybe it’s my age.  My soon-to-be 71 years on earth, is tired of the longest days.  Those late spring-into-summer ones where there is no set boundary between day and night.  It was different when the kids were younger.  Late nights in the backyard while m children, and the neighborhood kids played Manhunt and Capture the Flag.  Those nights catching fireflies.  Those hot nights listening to the symphonic cadence of crickets and cicadas.  Those nights of wishing they would never end.

But they did end.  The children grew into adulthood.  They moved away with lucrative careers and families.  And now it’s their time.  History repeats itself and the cycle goes on.

I’m acquiring a renewed fondness for skeletal trees–it’s a winter vibe!

The seasons are shifting for me in my older years.  These days, I prefer the sun bidding a fond adieu as late afternoon turns into darkness.  It separates the days into night.  Although I am not an ambitious person and would rather not work, my job gives me a much-needed routine. My husband and I have a set time for weeknight dinners.  And that routine includes watching Jeopardy at precisely 7:00 PM.  Lights out at 10.  Slumber comes easily.

Our highlights are visiting the kids and grandkids, heading into NYC, and traveling to Paris. So far, our year is planned.  Heading to California in summer for a family event, having family visit before Thanksgiving and hosting a “Pre-Thanksgiving” dinner, leaving for Paris at November’s end, then out to California for Christmas.  I’m already planning our pre-Thanksgiving dinner.  These are the things to look forward to.

Already planning Thanksgiving desserts like this pecan pie that I made some years back when I hosted Thanksgiving!

Don’t get me wrong.  I like the spring season.  In the morning, I enjoy hearing the chirping of birds that have arrived back from the South.  I love the ever-so-gentle sprinkling of green that the buds on the trees are gifting us with.  I love the comfort, finally, of driving barefoot due to the warmer temperatures.  And I appreciate the fact I don’t need a cumbersome, heavy coat when I venture outside.  The best part is not having to drive in the dawn’s darkness to work.   These are all pluses.

It’s just that at this point; I have a new admiration for Winter.  Those cold days where I can be comfy and cozy in the warmth of our home, relaxing on the sofa reading a book and listening to music is what I enjoy.  Being in bed with blankets and comforters in a cocoon like fashion.  A hot cup of tea or cocoa on a weekend afternoon.  Looking out the window at the first snowfall watching the flakes fall on the ground to make a soft, silent blanket of white.  The holidays.

I just want to loll on the sofa with a good book…or..

…the sunroom–with a nice hot beverage!

That said, Autumn remains my least-favorite season simply because summer lingers well into October.  October remains balmy.  Cool mornings and heat in the afternoon.  It doesn’t really begin to chill until November—giving us a window of one month before the return of winter.  And I can’t stand pumpkin spice.  It’s vile!

Pumpkin spice belongs only in pumpkin pie.

What are your opinions?  Have you changed your seasonal outlook as you’ve gotten older?  Will you forever be coastal grandparents?  Or will you be the modern version of Santa and Mrs. Claus?  I would love to know!

Or don’t go on thousand-dollar shopping hauls.  Or don’t live in a designer-quality home.  In fact, don’t hate me at all….

No. Buying all this won’t make you perfect and don’t even watch videos from influencers who showcase this sort of video.

Remember those ads—Don’t Hate Me Because I’m Beautiful?  Well, if you do, then you are old and have a very good idea of what real beauty looks like.  In the case of the ads, nobody hates these women.  Due to the 1980’s hair styles, though, it’s acceptable to “hate” 1980’s hair.

Kelly Lebrock in a Pantene ad from the 1980’s.  Kelly, I can assure you nobody hated you because you are beautiful.

When did society become so hung up on being perfect?  Honest to God, I’ve been spending less time on social media these days because of a few reasons—mostly because our political situation has triggered me to the point of medication.  But it isn’t only politics.  It’s the bullshit of grifters.  The allure of trying to be perfect in every way.

Perfect from your face to your body.  Perfect in your home.  Perfect in every way.  It’s boring and underwhelming.  And expensive.

Allow me to express my thoughts:

Back in the 1970’s beauty and perfection were not perfect.  Do you remember the actress, Karen Black?  Her eyes were a bit wonky, and I, as a cross-eyed individual, absolutely loved that she was not perfect, yet she was unique in her beauty.

Karen Black. A true unique beauty.  By today’s standards, social media would have the trolls and haters out. Her eyes always made me feel so good about myself.

Remember the great Lauren Hutton?  The model’s model?  She had that incredible gap between her teeth and, yeah, to add to her attractiveness, she had a lazy eye.  I would say that I was in good company!    These women were natural and individualistic beauties.  And that was welcomed back then.

I don’t think there has ever been a model as naturally beautiful as Lauren Hutton.  Her imperfections were her trademark.

Plastic surgery was basically unheard of .  No hemorrhoid lips or floating-device titties back then.  Natural was in.

The funny thing about this SNL sketch is more and more actors are looking like this version of Will Ferrell these days (Bradley Cooper–are you reading this?)

Can you imagine what Disney’s Cinderella would have to go through today? Oh those lips! Proof perfect ain’t perfect!

Now we have filters—in ads.  In videos.  And it remains to be false advertising.  The Il Makiage ads are disgustingly false.  No foundation is going to take your wrinkles away.  No foundation is going to erase imperfections.  And if you believe it is, then I got a bridge to sell ya.

Makeup should be used to enhance your features and slightly cover up, but not take away, skin imperfections—not making you perfect but making you a better image of yourself.

This is the most misleading crock of shit. Look at this “mature” woman’s skin. It’s normal older woman skin. She’s attractive.  She looks fine. She even has turkey neck as we all do with aging.

Look again my dears.  Look AFTER she applies this magic foundation that actually filters her!  Her wrinkles are gone.  She’s blurry–and the wrinkles in her neck are gone.  Why…she’s….she’s….she’s PERFECT–and all thanks to the foundation!

And bodies.  I’m sure you are familiar with The Osbourne family.  Kelly, the younger daughter of the children, in her young days was a bit on the plump side and there is nothing wrong with that. The online abuse she took must have been horrific for a young girl.  When she got older she lost some weight and looked absolutely beautiful.  She was a unique beauty who marched to the beat of her own drum and I loved her for that.

Credit where it is due, this photo of Kelly Osbourne from Bridgeman Images is gorgeous. She had a wonderfully normal body and she grew up to be a very unique body–her hair color is wonderfully suited to her personality.

After her dad, Ozzy’s, passing, she went into a serious period of grieving.  I get that. Losing a parent is horrible and we all have our ways to deal with it.  But there is something sad about this woman’s appearance.  I cannot bring myself to post a picture of her body because it is too triggering and just too disturbing.  However, here is how her face has changed.  It isn’t the same one as years ago.  Her hooded eyes of youth weren’t perfect but they were her. She was absolutely adorable.  Her features are different.  Is this because she is in grief or wanting to be today’s standard of perfect beauty?

It’s hard to come to terms with this being the same adorable woman.  I hope the 2026 photo isn’t because of wanting to keep up with today’s version of perfect.

Don’t even get me started on home perfection.  The onset of home influencers has me wishing that 2026 is the end of them.  And brands should know better.  Brands need to focus on their product and not some grifter to shill their wares.

Many would view this as contemporary perfection.  It’s clean and nice–I’ll give it that much but I prefer a less perfect, more lived-in look!

Growing up, home décor wasn’t a priority in our house.  With five kids, tuition for Catholic school, sports and other extra-curricular activities, the focus was on my mother’s obsession with clean clothing, three well-rounded meals a day (and not the processed meals), and a clean house.  In her eyes, perfection was polished hardwood floors and cleaning the sink edges with a toothpick (something I do to this day).

We had avocado-colored appliances in the kitchen, and foam-cushioned sofas in the family room because we weren’t allowed on the “good” furniture in the living room.  And that’s how many families lived.  Nobody tried to outdo each other.  There was no “aesthetic”.  Either you had a “nice” house or an untidy one.

Ahh. Memories of that “perfect” avacado kitchen from growing up!

Unless your parents were trained chef’s or sophisticated adults, the spice rack contained three items:  salt, pepper and Accent.  Maybe cinnamon during the holidays.  There were no overpriced “organizers” filling the pantry.  Pantries were made for children to go on scavenger hunts—like when our moms told us to go to the pantry for a can of tomato paste and we had to peruse every shelf, behind jars and tubes and other items for that small can of paste.  It was a challenge and we felt like we had superpowers for merely surviving that trip into the cave of an unorganized mess! It was fun and an object lesson for adulthood in doing research when we grew up and had jobs.

These days, I’m the only one who gets lost in this small pantry.  No matter how much I organize it, two days later it’s a mess. I am not ashamed because it brings back fun childhood memories of being lost in my mother’s walk-in pantry!

I find myself obsessed with little videos of people cleaning and organizing their homes into perfection.  Do these people cook a meal, or do they live on the ready-made, processed meals that are delivered to their door?  Do they take the time to plop down on a cushiony sofa and love seat to read a book or watch a TV show?  WTF are they doing vacuuming their garbage cans, organizing their refrigerator, and pontificating their dwelling’s wellness?

My house will never look this organized. I like having “stuff”.  Speaking of organized.

Speaking of organized, I  am a huge fan of Operation Niki’s videos on cleaning and organizing.  I watch her clean instead of doing it myself.  And by the end of her videos, I’m tired from all that cleaning and perfection!

I love Niki!  Her voice is so soothing and it calms me down.  But I do become exhausted after watching her videos. I don’t know how she does it!

Our dwelling’s wellness is making sure we have room spray for the bathroom, and the heat is working during the winter and in summer, the air-conditioning is keeping us cool in the humidity and heat of the Mid-Atlantic.

I’m a big fan–not that my…you know…doesn’t stink but spraying this gives off a guiltless scent!

We also have fake Christmas trees so that our house isn’t bothered by random fir needles popping up throughout the year.  That is our home wellness.

The “big” tree in the living room.

In my ever-imperfect way, we finally took the Christmas trees down last Saturday.  And there will be no random pine or fir needles!

Our individual wellness?  It isn’t having state-of-the-art exercise equipment (even if there was room) in our downstairs family room.  It’s me going to the Ob/gyn in January for my annual lady-parts exam, a mammogram in February for my girls to be squished like two crepes, and in March, my 6-month skin check (which is later this week and, as usual, I’m always petrified).  Then I have a six-month period of feeling fine until August when I have my annual “wellness” check-up, and every three years a colonoscopy, and in September my other 6-month skin check, which always has me stressed by the amount of sun I take in the summer.  Then I have October, November, and December as a distraction, which may be why I love Christmas so much, until January when the cycle commences for the next year.

“THANK GOD IT’S ONLY ONCE A YEAR THAT I SEE HER”–and that’s what my doctor says when she sees me–all of me!

Yes. That is what wellness is all about.  Wellness is not watching a wellness influencer tell you that to have a perfectly running body you must take these “generic brand gummy, jelly, artificially fruit flavored supplements to add strength, youthfulness, vim and vigor to yourself.  And might I add these little pellets of artificial flavor are not FDA-approved.  And they won’t prevent Covid nor will they take the place of being vaccinated.  Go to your doctor!

And let’s not forget about hair, skin and nail supplements that multitask. Thinning hair? Save your money and buy a wig.

I love imperfections.  In our home, I love that there isn’t a theme in our décor.  The vibe is comfort.  It’s inviting.  Plop yourself on the sofas or a chair.  Sit on the floor for all I care.   The dwelling isn’t perfect, but it is clean.  And that is all that matters.

Welcome. Take yer shoes off and relax.  take a seat and enjoy.

Like my parents’ priority was me and my siblings, when my children were young, they were the priority.  Currently, the priority is saving our money for travel and spending our money on our mortgage, car payments, utilities and every-day living expenses.  The priority isn’t running out and making purchases to have our home be a royal palace.  Instead, our home is an imperfect palace.  And that’s how I love it.

When I wake up in the morning and see the vision of my face reflecting in the mirror as I go to brush my teeth and was my face, I see a very old version of myself that isn’t perfect.  I don’t necessarily love the reflection, but I am thankful I woke up to see it.  And that’s what I love.

Every morning. Every. Morning.  The age spots. The discoloration. The wonky eyes. The lady whiskers that I need to pluck.  But as long as I get the opportunity to wake up and welcome the day, I’m happy!

Skincare, a bit of makeup, and, naturally, my fake hair are my assistants in making me look nice.  My eyes are still crossed and asymmetrical. The age spots have replaced the cute freckles of my youth.  The lines are lining.  Texture is still there.  My fang tooth still manages to stick out when I smile—and I love that.  All of that is part of what makes me, well, me.

Slap some makeup on to even out the skin, and it does the job. The eyes are still wonky.  The texture is still there but with a little assistance–especially with the wig–and my imperfections are an asset! Note–I’m not wearing mascara!

I love the comfort of our home.  When I come home from work at what I deem “Shudder Island”, I am entering my comfort zone of individual home décor and not that of some grifter telling me how to decorate.  It is my husband and my collective.

My happy place.  It may not be perfect to some but to me–it’s my chateau!

So there.  Take that throw blanket that your dog bit a hole into.  Take that scratched arm of the sofa that your cat decided to dig their claws into.  Take that tiny wine spill on the sofa to remind you of a great gathering during the holidays and embrace it all.  Admire your imperfections.  Because they have personality.  Imperfections are fun and quirky.  They are unique and make you..well, you!

A gentle reminder that we live with a dog.

And another gentle reminder.  Chippy owns this sofa. And yeah, there’s a little stain on the sofa’s arm.  But it isn’t worth it to sweat the small stuff. It makes life realistic!

Imperfection is reality.  Smoke and mirrors, as well as perfection, is an illusion and not realistic!