Dysfunctional Mom’s Christmas Saga. Part One. The Airport.

Hey everyone! I’m back to the blog with a few days’ rest. The Christmas Weekend.   Dysfunctionality on my behalf.  Fun times.  Stressful times.  Dramatically horrific times mixed in with the best times.

Today all is calm.  I’m sitting at my laptop, in my flannel pajamas and fuzzy Christmas slipper socks, drinking tea and writing about my dysfunctional mom life!

And in the end—it all works out.

Shall I begin?

So, Friday turned out to be the busiest day ever. I met Oona at the airport while Bonaparte drove into Center City to pick up the boys. T’was my plan to film a short wig review in the car while waiting for Oona’s plane to arrive.  I placed the wig’s stock card into my purse and kept it nestled there.

This wig.  I love it. And I DID place the stock card into my purse for a review to be filmed while in the car waiting!

However, Chippy had other plans and while I started to film my review in the car, I thought I left the stock card home. I didn’t. Chippy grabbed the card from my purse unbeknownst to me and chewed it in the back seat.  I was too busy playing Candy Crush Saga to notice that he robbed me.

Yeah. Look behind me.  He may look innocent but he isn’t!  He foiled my review!

 Add to that Philadelphia International Airport is an absolute $hithole during holiday season.  It isn’t necessarily the traffic.

This is a photo of the pick up/drop off area at Philadelphia Int’l. Airport. This is a propaganda pic.  During Holiday Season this scene turns into an absolute zoo.  

It’s the miserable airport police. While thousands of family members are landing and exiting the baggage claim areas in various terminals, they are being picked up by drivers of automobiles. That means the drivers or people picking the passengers up need to park their cars to load the luggage and allow their family members to get into the cars. 

Yeah. Perhaps this fit into the plane but it takes some manipulation to get it to fit into my trunk. OK?????

And so basically what we have are miserable officers who are pissed off that they are working at the airport during busy time but are receiving great pay for this but they are using their  power to bully drivers therefore taking the stress level between the drivers and travelers at an acme.

Yes. The pretend airport cops at Philadelphia Int’l. Airport can’t fight real crime so they bully drivers who are picking up and dropping off.  And that’s no lie!

This is how picking Oona up played out.  Her being frustrated with dysfunctional mom because I got flustered about which terminal to pick her up even though she texted me and told me about a dozen times that she would be at Terminal “F” closest to the airport exit.  Dysfunctional mom was too busy playing Candy Crush Saga to pay attention.

Mothers and daughters will “get” this.  Especially around the Holidays when everyone is traveling!

Then me getting frustrated because the idiot fake police who don’t fight real airport crime but threaten to and hand out tickets to the innocents who are picking up the travelers need to stop the car for at least one damned minute.

Oh yes.  Dysfunctional Mom is super chill and non-dramatic at all times. (Wait till you read about what happened on Christmas Day!)

See where this is going?  Not one minute and Oona and I were at it with each other. Dysfunctional Mom strikes again! Trust me on this one. If you have ever had to pick someone up or drop them off at Philadelphia International Airport during any Holiday season or holiday weekend, you know what I mean!

Did I mention that I am drama-free?  

Needless to say,  by the time we arrived home, all was calm. All was good.  And Dysfunctional Mom was able to enjoy the evening. And so was the rest of the family!

When all else fails–the Christmas tree calms the beast within us!

BTW, here is the fabulous wig review that I did.  I’m a vision of class with the ever-present wad of Double-Bubble bubble gum making an appearance in my mouth from time to time.

My mini-wig review. Just for you!


To be continued……..



About Catherine

Far from perfect, but enjoying life as a non-perfect and flawed individual at 60 years young. I'm still wondering what I'll be when I grow up! The characters in my life's screenplay include my better half. He is a refined Frenchman who grew up in Paris and summered in St. Tropez. I grew up in Long Island and summered in Long Island. I am not refined. My three grown children are also a big part of my life. For their sake, they happily live where their careers have taken them! But I can still mother them from a distance! I write about the mundane. I write about deeply shallow issues. But whatever I write or muse about--it'll always be a bit on the humorous and positive side! It's all good!
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13 Responses to Dysfunctional Mom’s Christmas Saga. Part One. The Airport.

  1. pasunejeunefille says:

    I’ll take Philly airport over the Newark airport any day. I had to pick up both my kids there this year the week before Christmas. NEVER. AGAIN. Much worse than Philly. They actually close access to the airport when it is too crowded. I got in just under the wire for my son. Much too stressful.

  2. Renee in Northern California says:

    Yesterday, I dropped my niece off at San Francisco Airport….crazy, crazy!!! I barely managed to keep my inner “dysfunctional Aunt” in check. On the way home I stopped for a drink and a walk…just to chill…sheesh, so happy that’s over!!

    • Catherine says:

      Oh. Renee! It’s ridiculous! Airport CEO’s or whatever-the-hell they are. are well-aware of the incredible amount of car traffic to pick up and drop off people who travel and yet nothing is done to make that transition from car to airport/airport to car easy. It’s disgusting!!! I need a drink just reading this–LOL!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

  3. Juliet says:

    Oh it isn’t Christmas without a falling out in our house, the 22yr old daughter isnt speaking to me for whatever reasons I currently dont care to guess. All I know is, is that while we are no-speakies she isnt asking for money, so silence is great. I love Chippy – look at the face – he knows EXACTLY how to press your buttons, what a guy!

    • Catherine says:

      LOL–Juliet. It’s good to know that I am not alone. In fact, many of us are in this position but few admit it!! Why does it happen during the Holidays!! Tee hee!!! Oh..Chippy is so good at pushing my buttons!! XOXOXOXOXO!!!!

  4. mareymercy says:

    HA ha ha the cops at IAH are every bit as bad this, and Doug gets into an argument with them EVERY SINGLE TIME. He just can’t help himself. I fully expect to get a phone call from the airport cops at some point telling me he’s been arrested. But they are utter *ssh*les!

    • Catherine says:

      Cynthia. I’m discovering that the Philly Airport-make-believe-cops-who-are-afraid-of-real-criminals are not the only airport-make-believe-cops! It’s unbelievable! I was ready to get out of my car and use physical force–but I didn’t want Oona to go to a hotel!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

  5. HelloIm50ish says:

    I can play shrink with the best of the TV doctors who don’t have a license to practice psychology, but have terrific TV ratings.
    Anyone who has to pick up family members at any airport in the nation before Christmas is going to have added stress. Rent a cops or real police are preventing the triple stacked cars at arrivals and departures. Cell phone lots are now being taken over by the Uber/Lift people.
    We feel obligated to pick up our kin because it’s our duty. No, it’s time to let it go. Have a nice glass of wine and wait for them to walk through the door. If you value a sane holiday, let them take an Uber or let them get a rental car. If they’re expecting free accommodations and transportation during Christmas, no one has spoken up and told them otherwise.
    I know we feel more pressure to be a Norman Rockwell painting during the holiday season, but many of us never experienced a perfect holiday.
    You are fabulous and I’m sorry you felt you were dysfunctional, but you aren’t. You were under duress as many people are during the holiday. Or is there a reason you and Oona were at each other at the airport? Dr.Frasier Crane is listening….
    You are blessed with family who wants to be be with you during the holidays, but if you’re stressed out about the taxi duty, speak up.Let it go.
    Chippy ate your homework, which I know as a blogger can cause agita.
    I love your honesty and your humor Catherine.
    My New Year wish for you in 2018 is live a stress free life and keep creating wonderful blogs!


  6. shelbeeontheedge1 says:

    Cathe, I seriously laughed out loud through this entire post! You are a trip, my friend, drama and all. And I love it! Put down the damn Candy Crush Saga for one minute and get Oona’s giant luggage into the car! hahahahahaha! I love you and your blog.


    • Catherine says:

      LOL. Michele, I think there would have been an even bigger scene had I told Oona “I was playing Candy Crush–how could I pay attention to your texts?” This is true stuff–Tee hee!!! XOXOXOXO!!!

  7. LA CONTESSA says:

    YIKES……….was there snow on the ground?
    Next time blow those POLICEMEN A KISS………and if that doesn’t work just remove the WIG!!!!!!

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