The Beauty of Being “The Ugly Girl” –You Age More Realistically

The other day, I saw a saying that someone posted on Instagram.  It was to the effect that we see ourselves as five times more attractive than we really are.  Apparently, there are articles based on this scientific assumption and this is fact!!!!  My life began to flash before me.  And I remembered that I was that “ugly” girl.  Oh yes.  I was.

Yes I am and yes I am!  Or am I?  Maybe I’ve finally woke up to reality in my elder age!

I was also that sister. You know, the one who was just a bit “off” in looks.  My two sisters were blessed with great hair texture.  My youngest sister had straight and shiny hair.  It was freaking shiny!!!  My other sister had thick hair that fell into the perfect wave pattern.  And she never had to blow dry her hair to get it to fall so perfectly.

Hell just froze over because I thought I would never have anything in common with a Kardashian.  But I do.  I’ve even been called “sir”!

On the other hand, I had a kinky, coarse, thick but unmanageable mane.  And in hindsight, it was only unmanageable because my mother had no idea how to care for this type of hair.  When I was younger, she would set it so that it either flipped out or so that it would fall into banana curls.

You have no idea how well I could relate to the pre-makeover part of The Princess Diaries!!

During those younger childhood days, I could get away with being on the edge of cute.  That was because my mother dressed me nicely!

Cute due to the beautiful dress and  somewhat manageable curls–but it doesn’t last too long!

And as soon as the pre-teen years hit, it all went to Hell. That’s right.  Any minute chance of my becoming even close to average looking hit rock bottom during puberty.  I think that possibly my genetic makeup may have been confused as to what gender I was supposed to be.

The two brows that grew above my misshapen and crossed eyes turned into one massive uni-brow.  My upper lip was suddenly a garden of rooted unsightly hair—and enough of it that in certain light, even with the assistance of Jolene Cream Bleach, looked like a full-on mustache!

And of being of equal proportions,  I had a matching line of hair above my upper lip!

Add to the fact that my mother cut my hair super short did nothing to feminize my now masculine looks.

Ugh. Sr. Mary Josephita. THE meanest nun of all time–and I had to get stuck with her.  The only GOOD thing about my mother cutting my hair super-short was that this witch wasn’t able to pull it.  She did slap me across the face though.  I’m in the second from top row. LOL–it doesn’t get worse than that—or does it..

Sr. Kathleen Marie.  God was good to me. He knew how much I suffered in sixth grade with Sr. Mary Josephita so he gifted me with this beauty of a nun–and she was kind too! I had a growth spurt that placed me in the top row–still on the end and the hair is still so disgustingly short. I swear my mother hated me! Tee-hee! You can see where my love of plaid and blazers stem from. I wish I still had that blazer!

I want to thank my childhood friend and classmate Linda Fay for sending these pictures to me when I requested them.  We Saint Pat’s kids stick together for life!  Thank you Linda!

I was miserable.  I was made fun of.  Timmy Schmidt told me to my face I was the ugliest girl he had ever seen.  That’s so mean! He wasn’t very pretty either!

My feelings were hurt–but in that hurt, I gained strength and a more realistic view of how I appeared to others!

When people told me I “had a face only a mother could love” they lied.  My mother  couldn’t stand the sight of it.  She would refer to my sisters’ good looks then stop when it came to describing me.

 

Hmmmm.  You mean to tell me I could’a been a muse for Picasso perhaps???

Things started to improve slowly as I took control of my looks.  I let my hair grow.  I learned how to make it as smooth as I could with the ammunition of large rollers, setting gel and, thankfully, the primitive blow dryers that started popping up on the market.

And although I did hold on to my flesh-toned Clearasil, I discovered makeup.  And added a touch of blush and mascara and lip gloss.

Phew!  Finally out of that awkward stage.  Here I am at 23 at a wedding.  As you can see, I was fine with my hair–it was tamed that day.  I’m only wearing a bit of eyeshadow, mascara and lip gloss.  The uni-brow was plucked and how I wish I had those natural brows back!!  And that dress. It was one of my favorites. Too bad I never saved it!

But it wasn’t until I began to really age that I came into my own and accepted the way I look.  With aging comes changes.  My eyelids were drooping. My skin wasn’t even-toned anymore. My face started getting blotchy patches with the lines and wrinkles.  I was asking myself “Are those large freckles or age spots?”.   My face wasn’t looking as dewy or luminous as it was some years ago.

I know–it looks like a ton of makeup.  It sort of is–but it’s fun–and is a ton of confidence!

I started to experiment.  Shading a bit here, highlighting and contouring a bit there.  Different lip colors.  Sticking only to what eye shadows worked for me.  Finding the right foundation.

That was the finished look.  A long way from that awkward “ugly” stage!

It’s a journey—but a fun one!

The hair—well, it’s no surprise to anyone that I lost most of it and I write about the journey often.  But the flip side is that wigs have brought me a new confidence.  Finally—in my sixties, I no longer have to worry about a thick, unmanageable mop of hair.  Now I have to worry if my husband will be home when the mail delivery comes with more wigs for me to wear!

I can rock red, black, multi-toned and blonde hair—and do it in a matter of seconds!

Yesterday I wore CAR-A-MEL hair (Yes–I emphasized the correct pronunciation!)

Today I’m rockin’ the 613 blonde!

And as a blogger who has a very small but fantastic group of regular readers, I know which angles to aim my phone when I’m taking photos.  I can’t afford a photographer but I sure know what side to selfie myself from!  Perhaps it’s the control freak in me—but I know how to photograph myself so that I don’t look like that ugly girl from years ago.  Or do I?  Maybe I still do appear unattractive to others.  And that’s quite alright because I look fine to me.  And after over fifty years of feeling hideous and unattractive, I can’t look any worse than I did in those school photos!

 

Hey, I may look like dog waste to others, but to me, I’m just fine!

Those awkward looking years.  Most of us go through them.  Only a choice few do not.  Those years when we are ugly.  Let’s be realistic about this.  Please.  Those ugly years shape us and mold us into who we are now.  But the sad fact is that we still tend to see ourselves as we did back then.

We need to stop that. We need to start feeling great about our looks—even if we are the only ones who think so.  What others think no longer matters.   And to that I say….

I, of the former unattractive and ugly duckling stage, have never been able to get by with my looks.  I’ve never been the one who’s beauty stood out in the crowd.  I’ve never been the one young men fought for.  Nobody has ever come up to me to comment on my looks except to tell me my eyes are crossed or that I’m the ugliest girl.  And because of this, I’m able to accept my aging face—and I’ve grown into it and love it!

My aging face.  Lines, wrinkles, jowls–it’s all okay because I’m no longer awkward about it!

Take a lesson from Jane Birkin.  She gets it!!

I LOVE Jane Birkin.  You know I don’t idolize anyone but boy–she comes close to it for me!  Read this article where she tells it like it is :  Jane Birkin–What I See In The Mirror.

There is beauty in growing up unattractive–but it comes much later. And it comes when you treasure it both inside and out!

 

 

About Catherine

Far from perfect, but enjoying life as a non-perfect and flawed individual at 60 years young. I'm still wondering what I'll be when I grow up! The characters in my life's screenplay include my better half. He is a refined Frenchman who grew up in Paris and summered in St. Tropez. I grew up in Long Island and summered in Long Island. I am not refined. My three grown children are also a big part of my life. For their sake, they happily live where their careers have taken them! But I can still mother them from a distance! I write about the mundane. I write about deeply shallow issues. But whatever I write or muse about--it'll always be a bit on the humorous and positive side! It's all good!
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56 Responses to The Beauty of Being “The Ugly Girl” –You Age More Realistically

  1. bonnie says:

    This was a great post! It is good to see ourselves clearly and take stock. I was cute growing up. Not pretty, not beautiful, not blessed with a fab body, but Ok. So, I knew that my looks wouldn’t get me much. Hence I needed to cultivate kindness, empathy, work ethic, and a personality that others wanted to be around. Also, I have never looked for a handsome man to love. Frequently I found them to be self-centered at best. Give me someone who has had to earn his way in the world of women.
    Anyway, you have made the most of yourself and look just fine. And best of all, you have a Frenchman who truly loves you and children who do too. What more to ask of life?

    Liked by 3 people

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Bonnie! Exactly!!! I think those of us who were not born with those golden exceptional looks do have more empathy, are kinder and do have better work ethics. But I just want to make the point that it’s ok to not be perfect! Glad you enjoyed the post!!! XOXOXOXO!!!

      Like

  2. Sharon Daly says:

    When we met at Nordstrom’s you looked very young for your age, slim, and pretty. Your positive attitude and warm personality radiate beauty.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Thanks Sharon!! Attitude definitely brings an inner beauty out into the open. And I don’t think we realize it until we get older. That’s one of the great things about aging!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  3. Christine D says:

    Awh……..so tender and vulnerable. Maybe we all have a turn being ugly duckling and know how that feels…….but it does ask us to look deeper and, if we are lucky, we can come home to ourselves and love ourselves as is. Have you ever known someone who was not very attractive in appearance but when getting to know them they are incredibly beautiful on the inside which makes them more attractive visually? Beauty is not only in the eye of the beholder but a reflection of our self love ……how we smile, carry ourselves, extend care and joy towards others. I have known one woman who is very beautiful visually, but when she opens her mouth……watch out…….it’s pretty ugly. I can no longer see her as pretty, as the beauty is eroded by by attitude behind it. By 55 she had several face lifts, eye lifts, etc and now no lo get looks like herself.
    I agree that loving ourselves from deep inside is essential to beauty, both inner and outer. I hope I can care for myself and love myself more deeply as I continue to age.
    I grew up being called names, made fun of by my own father, and it does take a lifetime to change those internal messages, to come home to myself.
    Thanks for great topic.
    Chris D

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Chris! I’m glad you enjoy this topic. It’s something we should talk about too. We all go through those so stages in life and some people really don’t like to talk about it–talk is good. I only wish my mother would have made fun of me–it would have been better than having to listen how pretty my other sisters were–LOL. But I have known women who were so stunning and breathtakingly beautiful in appearance but boy–they were so nasty and ugly in spirit. And your right–I’ve also known women who were not beautiful by any means but their personalities and kindness gave them a beautiful aura and glow. Thank you for your comment!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  4. Debe says:

    Ok I get the unibrow I hate when I am sitting at my desk and I put my hand on my chin during a thought process….and chin hairs!

    Fine ones, stiff ones, ones how in the hell???

    Then you take the lighted mirror and you find ones all over! I am not the type to sit for laser, hair removers naw…..magic in a can. A friend, male, black told me about a shaving powder black men use to avoid razor bumps. To remove their beard. Ok if it works on a male beard hmmmm so I am gonna try this. If it works i will tell you.

    Growing up is hard to do and growing older is a pain in the patoot!

    Stay cool ladies. 😎

    Liked by 1 person

  5. fiona says:

    That nun sounds evil! (I laughed at the horns) I had a fringe just like you, I think my parents were so hard up back then, they couldn’t afford regular haircuts so they got their money’s worth when I did have one. I was definitely no ‘looker’ as a child but I didn’t have a sister to compare myself to.
    Hah, Jane Birkin’s spot on.
    You are rockin’ the caramel wig. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Fiona. You know, the funny thing is, all the other nuns who taught me were great!!! Sr. Mary Josephita was the nun from Hell!!! In fact, she’s the only nun that my father ever confronted in anger. It was after she slapped me across the face and left a welt. And my parents were usually on the side of the nun. She ended up leaving the school after she taught our class. Nobody wanted to go to school and I can’t think of one person who liked her!!! Ugh!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  6. Lynn says:

    I think you’re beautiful! I just discovered your blog and I love it. I’m almost 61 and can relate to everything you say. I’m sick of those blogs full of 30 something skinny Barbie dolls that all lol alike and put 20 pictures of themselves in their posts. I’m imperfect, you’re imperfect. Let’s embrace it.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Catherine says:

      Thank you Lynn!!! And that’s one of the reasons I started blogging–to prove to others that there ARE some of us who are not perfect. And that’s perfectly fine!! I embrace my imperfections fully–it’s who I am. I have scars from accidents and skin cancer and they are now a part of me!! I’m so happy that you like this blog and welcome to my neighborhood!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  7. Love this but what you don’t mention is your freaking GORGEOUS smile which light up your face in all your picture. I always say a smile takes ten years off – stay gorgeous, gorgeous!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Also think of those poor young women who get a free pass all their young lives because they are stunningly beautiful but then they don’t know how to handle it when they age and they haven’t got anything apart from those now vanishing looks! Much better to suffer being ugly young (and, man, I was PLAIN!) and then find your groove when your older – AFTER you’ve developed a personality!

    Liked by 3 people

    • Catherine says:

      Bingo Warrior! That’s one of the reasons that Jane Birkin is the one woman that comes close to being an idol for me. She wasn’t beautiful as a child and she’s very comfortable in her beauty (Although I think she was gorgeous when she was younger). I’m sure glad we’ve found our groove as we’ve aged!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  9. LA CONTESSA says:

    I had the CONNECTO eyebrows too!!!!!!!
    Think I had your HAIRCUT AS WELL……………
    I was called RANKINSTEIN as I was TALL in elementary school.Rankin being my last name.
    SO,it’s NORMAL to go through an UGLY STAGE!LOOK YOU HAVE HAD TWO HUSBANDS!YOU cannot BE UGLY!!!!!!!XX

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Lol. Elizabeth!! I can’t picture you at all with that kind of haircut. Those hair styles?? OMG. What were they anyway? Not stylish enough to be a pixie? They were just awful!! And being tall is a blessing!!!!!!!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  10. Sue says:

    Love the caramel color on you!!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Sue Burpee says:

    I’m with you sista. I remember my grandfather saying I was nine axe handles tall and just as wide. Don’t think he meant to be mean… but how I wanted to have curves. And not have frizzy hair…. I so wanted to have Donna Parker hair when I was twelve. And then a couple of years later wished I had no reason to use Clearasil! Like you it git better with years. I remember age 27, thinking… hmmm… I’m not so bad. Now at 61, I think I;m more confident than I even was. That’s one thing that improves with age:)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Sue. My grandfather used to call me “piano legs” but he wasn’t being mean either. It’s just how it was! Ohhhhhh I wanted straight hair so badly and so many of my friends had pin straight hair! Isn’t it funny when we finally realize that, as adults, we really weren’t so bad???? XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  12. Enid Hogrobrooks says:

    You are beautiful inside and out Sis♥

    Liked by 1 person

  13. ejsna says:

    But you’re beautiful and you look fab- u-lous wirh your wigs!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Laney says:

    I’m curious…I read the wig blog yoy fid recently, but is there a particular brand you prefer?
    And yes, you ARE very attractive!!!! Five times more than you think you are!!!

    Like

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Laney. Thank you. The brands that I purchase the most are Bobbi Boss; Model Model; It’s a Wig, and Freetress Equal. The quality of the wigs are great at a lower and more affordable price. And the hair is very much like my bio texture!!! XOXOXOXO!!!

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Toni says:

    Growing up I always felt like I was the least attractive of all my friends. They all had long, straight beautiful hair and I, on the other hand, had curly, kinky, hair and hated it. Of course, my beloved mother always would tell me how much people would pay to have my hair. Her words never comforted me but I knew she was just trying to make me feel better about myself. Now that I am pushing 63, I actually like how I look. I rock my wigs (all the curly thick hair has disappeared due to medication) and I feel vibrant. What a great, relatable blog you’ve written today. And, by the way, I also attended Catholic school and had my version of your hellish nun was Sister Ann Cecilia, in the third grade.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Tony. I swear I wish that curly hair care was part of our growing up since I’m pushing 63, we are the same age and had the same issues. I dig wearing the wigs these days but there is still a little bit of me that would love my old hair back–issues and all!! LOL. I’m so glad that you enjoyed this post! There was always one of those nuns–eh??? XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  16. That was a great blog! And I could really relate, having gone through ugly stages off and on during my life, funny how we never quite forget those insults. I could also relate to the mean nuns, although I went to a different St. Pat’s they seem to be universal, every school had a few. And the short haircuts, my mother cut my and my sister’s hair into these short French pixie cuts, because she had had long hair when she was a child and hated the fuss, and they were hideous – when every other girl in the class had long hair, I felt singled out. I used to bawl when she took us to the hairdressers, so finally she gave up and let me grow it out, and then I looked better as my hair was my best feature. I guess we learned resilience, and developed other characteristics. I would never want to be one of those model types who are dependent on their looks…..well maybe for a day! Anyway, glad I found your blog, it’s full of style and lots of fun!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hey Homeplace!! Ugh. Those short haircuts. I would NEVER do that to my daughter. The only “formulatic” haircut Oona every had was a China Chop or Dutch Boy. A simple bob with bangs. That was her signature “do” up until Middle School when she was able to take care of her own hair and she has a gorgeous head of hair. Whoever thought of cutting little girls hair into those horrid pixies I’ll never know!! LOL!! I’m also fascinated by the fact that nobody in my class photos looks particularly happy–I guess we were told not to smile!! Thank you–I’m glad that you enjoyed this post!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Jean says:

    It’s amazing what people say to each other – even when they’re adults. When my sister and I were about 6 and 10, someone said to my mother: “Jo, your daughters are so beautiful! Who do they look like?” And people wonder how children learn to be cruel.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Jean. OMG–Why does that remark someone said to your mother not surprise me. I get back-handed remarks that question my intelligence when I mention what kinds of careers my kids have. I’m not kidding either. I’ve had people ask if I took the right baby home from the hospital(and my answer usually begins with a word that begins with the letter “f” and ends with the letter “k” followed by the word “you”. Mean kids = mean adults. It’s all in the parenting!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  18. Penny says:

    Ooh yes, sister! And I note you used Clearasil! So did I – for years! I had bad acne, fortunately not the kind that scarred, but even so it went on until my mid to late-twenties, along with a very hairy chin! Actually that hairy chin got worse and worse and worse and darker and darker and then thicker, it was awful and such a bad thing for a twenty-year old. But I did sort it out through electrolysis. I never got to laser it as that hadn’t been invented then! So I’ll never know if I could have got the hair permanently removed. But I’ve stuck with the electrolysis and still have an occasional session, because I never ever pluck, as this according to the electrolysis people is the worse thing you can do. Well, whatever, excess hair has been the bane of my life for ever. In comparison ageing is nothing compared to the hair problem!!

    I think you’ve been and are a great role model showing the problems of your hair situation – as for the lighter colour wigs they’re amazing, as you are! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Thanks Penny!!!! I’m glad that you liked this post!! But oh..those friggin’ hairs. I spent 15 minutes this morning trying to get at ONE dark hair growing out of the middle of my chin. It hadn’t “grown” out completely so I had to keep plucking. It’s so annoying!!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  19. So right, so right, so right you are! I can relate on so many levels. I was not an attractive child AT ALL. People often remarked at how big my teeth were and how high my forehead was! Then I got teased in school because of my teeth, then my big nose, then my big boobs. I got braces, my parent’s approached me in high school and said if I wanted to I could have a nose job but I had to pay for it myself. I did. I worked full time in high school. It got better, I had more confidence. In college I had a breast reduction. Now at 49 my hair is thinning at the crown and I am wearing a hair topper. I haven’t even shared that with anyone on my blog but I intend too soon. Most people have no idea. This has all made me stronger and made me realize if I want to change something I can. I am enjoying reading your blog and you look stunning in all of these wigs. I laughed out loud at the horns you put on the Sister in your class photo!!! Ha!!!
    xo,
    Kellyann

    Like

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Kellyann! Thanks so much for sharing what you went through. It’s always comforting to know that we are not the only ones who were unattractive at one time or another. It’s reassuring in the fact we need to bond together and stop ourselves if we become critical of others. It’s so funny because my “topper” phase lasted less than a year–it was actually more trouble for me to figure out the placement of the topper than to plop a wig on my head! And when I started wearing wigs I was very self-conscious. Now–I don’t care. I’m doing it for me!!! XOXOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  20. Momcat says:

    God people can be so thoughtless and say cruel things to young people that can affect them for years. Looking back I think a lot of us convent raised girls had similar experiences. The nasty nun ( Sister Saint William…aka Wild Bill) the dreadful ‘pixie’ haircut. I never had sisters but I had a mom who suffered from WWPS…or What Will People Say. She hated long hair on her girl child…in fact she really didn’t like her girl child. I got away when I was twenty, I mean my new husband and I moved 500 miles away!! 43 years later we are still together, I have reconciled myself to my mother’s issues which were untreated mental health problems. I have learned that looking forward is always better for us then ruminating on the past. We are so lucky to have forums like Atypical60 to ‘Discuss’. It took me awhile to break free from that feeling of being the ‘Ugly Duckling’ I have surrounded myself with loving, supportive family and friends. I read somewhere that people reflect back to us who we show them…if true I think I have succeeded. Sadly, my 91 year old mom has advanced dementia and now I make the decisions for her.
    Cath you are beautiful and kind and above all you don’t take yourself so seriously and praise God, girl ( as another fan noted) YOU SMILE!! I can’t stand these scary midlife ‘lady’ blogs where the blogger does not smile…at all. Speaking of JBirken, Sunday Morning did a piece about her a few weeks ago which I watched with Mr. 21. His comment afterwards was “What a charming woman! She speaks so well and is so interesting” OK when a 21 year old guy finds a woman interesting and she could be his Grandma that woman is worth getting to know. She is awesome and she is clearly still missing the great love of her life, Serge Gainsborough, but she lives her life on her terms. Great lesson to learn.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Momcat. Hope your recovery is coming along swimmingly!!! Hey–we are kindred spirits in our relationships with our moms. But Jane. Jane Birkin. Daniele knew her and was fond of her. I wish I could have met her. I adore Jane Birkin because she is everything that an older woman should be–she’s her own person and doesn’t follow the rules. I love her!!!! XOXOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  21. Lola says:

    I too loved this post. As an ugly duckling myself, I think my swan phase last oh, maybe three years and the poof! I struggle nowadays with figuring out who I am, now that I am rocking a full head of silver mixed with grey. I went from brown to silver, six weeks after my husband died at age 46. Your blog is great. Putting me back in touch with my appearance without feeling so alone. Thank you, thank you.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Catherine says:

      Hiya Lola!! Wow! I’ll bet you are rocking the hell out of that silver/grey head of hair!!! I’m sorry that your husband passed away–and so young!!! I’m very happy that you are enjoying the blog and I’m happy to have you as part of this wonderful group!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  22. Deb says:

    Your beautiful! Don’t change a thing.

    Like

  23. Juliet says:

    Oh wowsers – what a fabulous post, and I think you’re adorable – even as a young ‘un. I swear, absolutely swear our mothers must be related – I had the shortest haircut possible (think Mia Farrow but not cute with it, my mother used to randomly lunge at me now and then and snip extra bits off). My sister had the shiny chestnut hair and big blue eyes, my eyes are a “meh” kind of green, it was a given that my sister was the “pretty one” and I was then expected to be either clever or charming before mother decided I was neither 🙂 years later my sister told me how she hated that label as she felt like a doll and totally constrained. In my teenage years I tried to grow my hair a little – despite it being superfine and curly (the worst possible combination), so it grew straight out from my head like Einstein (without the smarts), coupled with that I was prescribed the most hideous blue framed glasses and I was what my mother called “buxom”. “Buxom” was mother-speak for an early developer (and fat), it was double-speak for “trollop-y” and basically a stain on my character. It has taken 50 years or so to get over this – but really, there are worse alternatives – imagine my best friend from High School (ie frenemy Bronwyn) who was a bottle blonde from about 13 and super sophisticated (to my eyes), a friend ran into her about 10 years after we left school – she was dumpy, dowdy and frowsy and sad – as the mutual friend said, how awful to have had your best years as a teenager and then all downhill from there..

    I feel happy with my looks finally – in that I am OK with me, I am not interested in comparing with others my age (or any age). I look OK for ME – skin care, good diet and finally having the objectivity and confidence to wear/present myself as I wish. I think/hope things will only get better for us as we age

    Liked by 3 people

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Juliet. Oh..I think there are quite a few of those high school pretty girls who haven’t aged gracefully. I’m glad to be a very late bloomer!!!!!! But those Mia Farrow haircuts our mothers gave us–did they not realize that haircut only looked good on Mia??? XOXOXOXO!!!!

      Like

  24. HelloIm50ish says:

    Catherine,
    Wow! You have really struck a chord with so many women with this post!
    I think you are so pretty and I’m so sorry that your youth was spent feeling less than attractive.
    You are an inspiration to so many women to be happy with who you are and accept yourself with grace.
    My mirror is an 8x, so I’m way off!

    Hugs,
    Robin

    Like

  25. junedesilva says:

    Another great, thought provoking post! You’ve touched a chord – as always. As a teenager, I had a complex because my dad was Anglo Indian which was reflected in my looks. I was teased about this at school. It was only when I went to London, as a student, that I appreciated how lucky I was to look different! I guess it’s all about confidence. My first husband was unbelievably good looking but a total s**t!!! I learned from that mistake. Now, as I age, I accept that every laughter line/ wrinkle etc is a reflection of my life. I’m lucky to be here to look at my aging face – not all my friends have reached their sixties. However, like you, I’m not prepared to become invisible! Xoxo 😘

    Like

  26. calensariel says:

    Upliftingly great post!!!

    Like

  27. doodletllc says:

    Beautifully said. A true feel good post for us all. 🙂

    Like

  28. Lindsay says:

    Yours is the only blog I read that has me laughing out loud! I love that you not only entertain us, but actually tell it like it is, and also give us ‘finely aged’ ladies some great information. This is a great topic and hits home with all of us plain gals!! This should be your full time gig. Someone better wake up and sign you up for syndication because you deserve it! One of these days, I’m going to bump into you at KOP Mall or Phil Prem Outlet! BTW- you are gorgeous, and you have the greatest smile!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Lindsay! OMG. Thank you! I’m so happy to make you laugh–that’s my goal!!!! Damn–I wish someone would wake up and sign me too–LOL!!! Maybe we will bump into each other–I hope so!!!! XOXOXOXO

      Like

  29. Susan D says:

    I’m a bit late reading this, but like everyone else it so resonates. I’ve never been a pretty girl and know all my bad bits, but at almost 70 I feel my most confident and possibly look my best ( apart from the signs of ageing, of which there are plenty!). I was always sturdily built and my daddy always said I had legs like a prop forward ( rugby). He was a very funny man and wasn’t being cruel, but he was right and they are still my bete noire. However, my mum was never pretty and he loved her – he said that when they got married she weighed 9 stone and 7 of that was her legs! He also said that everyone has their day, their “pretty” day and mummy arrived at her’s when she was fifty. He also said that if you are pretty when you’re young it doesn’t always last – how right he was. When I look around at the pretty girls from my youth, their prettiness very rarely lasted.
    Sister Maria Goretti – taught me from the age of 6 to 9 – I need say no more of her – you know.

    Your blog is the best thing – and I wish more success as you deserve this.

    Susan D

    Like

  30. bernielynne says:

    I had wild crazy hair growing up — natural curl requires someone who knows how to cut it!! I finally found that someone about 5 years ago at the age of 55! Oh well. I’m rocking the white curly haired look. My eyebrows have disappeared and the extra pounds keep the wrinkles away. I’m happy and content that I’m a good person and that’s much more important than what I look like.

    Like

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