Would You Cheat for Your Children?

Ever since the news broke about Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin’s mega-bucks spending sprees to acquire college admission for their children, I can’t get that question out of my mind.

A seemingly innocent aunt of a Full House and a Desparate Housewife–cheating and thieving to send their kids to a good school.  How rude!!!

If I had their, or any other persons of extreme wealth’s funds, I wouldn’t.  What I would do is hire a proper tutor or SAT coach to further educate them and give them pointers but I wouldn’t buy a spot in a college or university for them.

The first I heard of the news was actually online and was focused on Huffman’s “scandal” and when I saw the recent photo of her, all I could think was “Wow—I wish I had her money and plastic surgeon because she looks great!”

Check out the before and after pics of Huffman.  I’m telling money is better spent on great plastic surgery than cheating.  Hey Felicity–my birthday is coming up and I’m poor AF–can you treat me to your plastic surgeon?  

And then it sunk in along with the $500,000 that Aunt Becky and her designer husband paid to get their daughters into USC.

Hmmm.  Is Lori Loughlin’s husband tan-gifted naturally, or is he fake tanned like all of Hollywood–and me?

So many thoughts were swimming around in my gray matter.  I was shocked, disgusted, angry and fed up—but yet, I wasn’t surprised.

Apparently, this practice has been going on for a long time. Wealthy people securing a place for their less-than-intellectually-gifted children into Ivy League or other institutes of higher education by way of the almighty donation.  Money.  A building.  A wing.  Name your price.  Get my idiot child into your school.

I have NO idea what school these guys are from but the “A” isn’t for behaving like Hester Pryne!  Judging from the aura of inbreeding, I’m sure these are blue-bloods who’s parents’ cheated old-school style to get the fruits of their loins into institutes of higher education!

And it’s so wrong on every level.

It’s cheating.  It’s white-collar crime.  It’s vulgar.  It’s entitlement at it’s worst.  It’s basically saying “I have money, therefore I’m better than you”

Pretty-much says it all-doesn’t it?

And it reminds me of something my father told me. He said “Katie—you are no better than anyone and nobody is better than you”

Think about those words—they ring so true.  No one person is better than anyone else.  Does anyone $hit gold medallions?  I think not.  We all have the same bodily waste.  We’re all on an equal par.

Or are we?  The cheating starts early—and it’s the parents to blame.

I think back to when my own kids were in school.  They did their own projects.  If assistance was needed in the form of my bringing in treats to coincide with a project, I would do so for them.  But they did the work and the research and the final product!

And its one thing that has always irked me—the project.  As God is my judge I’ll never forget when my daughter, Oona, was in third grade and the students had a project where they had to dress like a character and recite an oral speech.  Parents were invited for a fun time.

One of her classmates came dressed as Pocahontas.  Her grandmother made an elaborate outfit and the child had to refer to index cards because she couldn’t even pronounce many of the words she had to recite.  Who gets the grade?  Grandma?

In my time as a mom, I’ve come across a percentage of parents who would do their child’s homework; parents who called up the coach because their child didn’t make the team and parents who challenged the school system because their child didn’t have the smarts to get into an AP Class.  Yet, the parents insisted their child get into said class and therefore dragging the rest of the class down.

These are forms of cheating. It’s being dishonest and it isn’t giving your child true values or an exercise in real life.

So true.  I would be surprised if these women did any time–yet a person of color goes to jail for years over a stolen candy bar!  These women stole college tuition and a career from a student who SHOULD have gotten into school on merit!

I may not have been the perfect mom but I damn well sure as hell would never cheat to get my child ahead in school or extra-curricular activities.  It takes a spot away from one who deserves it.

Yes. I was the mom with the “saucy” vocabulary–but I gave my kids a terrific set of values.  

What message are these people giving their entitled spoiled brats?  That it’s ok to cheat your way in life.

I have absolutely no sympathy for Ms. Huffman and even less sympathy for Loughlin and her husband, the designer Mossimo Giannulli!

Actor Felicity Huffman (R) appears in this court sketch at an initial hearing for defendants in a racketeering case involving the allegedly fraudulent admission of children to elite universities, at the U.S. federal courthouse in downtown Los Angeles, California, U.S., March 12, 2019. Image created March 12, 2019. REUTERS/Mona Edwards

While I do give Ms. Huffman (of the stellar plastic surgery) credit for appearing humble, she still doesn’t get a pass from me.

But Aunt Becky?  Look at the arrogance!  Where Huffman appeared humble, Loughlin looks like an entitled bitch. I hope she goes to jail!

So far Hallmark has dropped Loughlin from her present project with them and there will be no more projects.  Netflix has dropped her from the upcoming season of Fuller House.  It looks like she ruined her career—and rightly so.

Yeah honey. Hopefully nobody is gonna have mercy on your cheatin’ arrogance!

Her daughter, Olivia Jade, who is a huge Instagram and YouTube influencer has been dropped by Sephora, TRESSeme and other companies she’s collaborated with.  This young entitled brat has gone on record (on her YouTube channel) to wax poetic about how she can’t stand school.  Meanwhile, somewhere out there is a 19-year-old who studied hard all through high school, took SAT courses, did well and did not get into USC or their choice of Ivy League college and some privileged little snot did.

Something tells me that these two aren’t smiling now!

Can any good come out of this?

No Felicity–we will talk about your plastic surgery later but your crime today!

And take a look at how your husband is handling this!

Well…hopefully it should and I hope it does.  Our institutes of higher education are money makers—many schools sit on millions to billions of dollars and tuition rates climb.  For what?  Will these kids get a good return on the money spent?   They will stress while the wealthy entitled will end up getting a great job because mommy and daddy know people.

I, for one would love to see free college in this country—but that’s another can of worms.

I want this expose to linger.  I want the guilty parties exposed. I want them to go to jail—yes, I do.  They lied. They cheated.  And people of lesser incomes go to jail for a longer time for lesser crimes.

So perhaps our system will change a bit.

For me—this whole scandalous incident makes me even more proud of my three children than I’ve ever been.  They worked hard during their college years.  Harder than many people because nothing was handed to them on a silver platter—not even a Chinet © plate! All three are successful adults and they did it on their own.  And each of them will still manage to say that they could have worked harder.

While the children of stars and the wealthy are getting wasted,  I can rest assured that my three kids were hitting the books and got into school on their own merit!

What’s your take on this?  I’m wondering if you are as disgusted and angry as I am.  Voice your opinion in the comments~

About Catherine

Far from perfect, but enjoying life as a non-perfect and flawed individual at 60 years young. I'm still wondering what I'll be when I grow up! The characters in my life's screenplay include my better half. He is a refined Frenchman who grew up in Paris and summered in St. Tropez. I grew up in Long Island and summered in Long Island. I am not refined. My three grown children are also a big part of my life. For their sake, they happily live where their careers have taken them! But I can still mother them from a distance! I write about the mundane. I write about deeply shallow issues. But whatever I write or muse about--it'll always be a bit on the humorous and positive side! It's all good!
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36 Responses to Would You Cheat for Your Children?

  1. Juliet says:

    I can’t even imagine the logic behind doing such a dreadful thing. You cheat and lie to get your kid somewhere they don’t belong and then what? will they thank you, will they study hard and do their best, will they make the most of that (unfair) opportunity??? No, no, no. The chances are they will feel too entitled to care as long as mummy/daddy keeps paying, it may even be detrimental to them to know that mummy/daddy doesn’t value them for who they are but for what they should pretend to be. That isn’t parental love, that is fake and dishonest to the kid as much as to any other kid or anyone else… let alone teaching your kid that such a thing is OK.

    I have to tell you the other half is an academic and we used to seriously worry about madam (youngest child, stroppy, cranky and couldn’t be bribed to study or behave – she was a monster and always seemed to be outside and hanging out of a tree when she should have been studying, I can count two maybe three teachers I suspect quit because she was a such a toad), well she suddenly asked for a tutor in last year and her projected D in English morphed into an A+ by dint of HER very hard work, her tutor adored her and was blown away by her work ethic as she really struggled with English. We suspect she fought hard against the stereotype of being an academics daughter and didnt want to be pigeonholed or it assumed life was given to her because of HIM. She took a year after school to figure what she really wanted and told anyone nosey enough to ask to butt out, she then got into one of the top uni in the UK (her choosing and long story – lots of research on her part) for her Bachelors graduating with a distinction and an unconditional for the top university for her chosen masters which she turned down to go to another top uni for a different masters – less prestigious but more value in terms of benefit to society. She then phoned us up to say she was thinking of doing a PhD at another top uni but didn’t expect to get the gig so would treat it as practice and could dad (the only time she ever asked or allowed help) come up with as many hard/horrible interview questions as he could think of and fire them at her.. She got the PhD position (paid!!!! YEUSSS) and by HER hard work – every step has been hard work, she can’t spell for toffee, she had health problems during her bachelors, she lost her brother second to last year of high school – you name it, not once did she ask for an easy path or any smoothing of the way. She has absolutely grafted and she has made a phenomenal job of getting every opportunity from her education and the associated opportunities… all her hard work, ALL of it. The thing is she gets every opportunity from hard work and pays back by running groups or giving something of herself supporting others, she asks for nothing – she works for it.

    If those parents loved their kids for who they are they wouldn’t care that they were thick or anything else – they would focus on bringing up decent kids that were suited to their (earned) potential and have a great life. Sorry such a long rant but those kids have no hope with scumbag dishonest parents who haven’t considered their own kids well being anymore than any other kid. Pffffffffffft Those kids have been let down by their parents blighting their opportunity to be something as their parents couldn’t trust them or themselves as basic human beings

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Wow Juliet! Kudos to your daughter! But look how her hard work paid off–and that’s the thing. Being a parent means giving the values to our kids and allowing them to decide–are you gonna do it or slack off? By the time they reach their mid-to late teens they strap up! Being a parent also means not being their best friends, saying “no”, being there when they want to talk and you need to listen and taking an interest in them as people–not things. And I think these people, and many wealthy people have kids because they feel it’s what you should do.
      They are, in a nutshell, lousy parents who now have lousy kids! XOXOXOXO

      Liked by 1 person

      • Juliet says:

        I totally agree – I almost feel sorry for these kids, almost – it’s a tough call as these kids are so damaged and unpleasant. Their parents really are appalling

        Like

  2. Jane says:

    Right on Catherine! Couldn’t say it better myself.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Liz McGarry says:

    I agree with everything you said, Cathe. The parents should be dealt with harshly and maybe the universities should even consider revoking the degrees of students who were admitted under this corrupt system…

    Liked by 2 people

    • Catherine says:

      Hey Liz. Oh..the parents should face jail time and lose their big-time careers. Same for the CEO’s and the rest of them. The universities are partially to blame for not looking into their applicants with a finer toothed comb. Colleges and Unis are now money makers and the cost of higher education needs to come down tremendously! It’s disgusting! XOXOXOX

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Momcat says:

    I once worked with a woman who had a boy child who was, to put it lightly,more than a bit contrary. She was a single mom who worked three jobs to put a roof over the kids heads. I sort of lost touch but bumped into her one day and she told me her son had just graduated with his BSc. Knowing his past I said to her” You must be so proud of him” her reply ( and I have never forgotten this) ” I take no credit and I accept no blame” I was a little stunned by this answer and asked her to explain. She replied: I gave him the tools he needed to survive how he used them was his choice. He got to where he was by his own hard work, I won’t take any credit it’s all his, but if he had totally f-cked up I wouldn’t take any blame either.
    I never forgot those words and often thought how many kids went to certain schools to appease their parents egos. Working amongst the highest of high achievers ( medical docs) it’s interesting that not all will say ‘I always wanted to be a doctor’ but instead ‘ my parents wanted me to be a doctor thank fully I got good marks’ …that always bothers me.
    I told my kids I don’t care what the heck you do for a living as long as it’s legal, you can make enough to support yourself, give your best everyday and the first degree is on the house but the post grad is your business kiddo. Granny-mommy wants to retire before she’s ninety.
    Yeah that business about buying a college placement is disgusting. Very sad. My niece graduated from UPenn as a dentist and has YEARS ahead of her to pay off loans. The cost of Felicity’s surgeries would have covered at least a year of loan repayments.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hear Hear Momcat/!! That quote of your friend’s is astounding! Another point is that people have this idea that as soon as someone graduates from Med School they are making the big bucks. Yeah–they do well, but it takes years to pay off the loans. My daughter didn’t go to Med School but she has a mortage in student loans that she’s been paying off and it pisses me off that the majority of college grads have a ton of debt!
      We need a big change and hopefully, this latest incident will start the ball rolling! XOXOXOXO

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Trudy says:

    First of all why is this scandal only focusing on the women? These are two married couples.
    Secondly, how stupid was this whole effort when the Lori Loughlin’s daughter said that she didn’t want to go yo college? You could’ve donated that money towards a scholarship for students that actually wanted to be there.
    And thirdly, and even stupider. Both of Lori Loughlin”s daughter’s have now quit school and Lori lost her production deal. So it was all for what. exactly?
    Lastly, when people of color have lied about addresses to send their kids to better, safer schools for the benefit of their children, they’ve been arrested like hardened criminals. Where’s the justice?
    Not very well thought out. Obviously this is a pervasive thing and buying educations us the norm at these colleges to stay prestigious. So it just makes local colleges like CUNY and SUNY look even better. So these kids were just going to coast the whole time and learn nothing adding more mediocrity to the environment as if the president wasn’t a good enough example of what money and coasting can do.
    No I wouldn’t cheat fir my children if I had any. They would have to work but then again as a person of color being the reason white person point to as to why they didn’t get into a school, this is way too satisfying to see this wool pulled from over some people’s eyes. It was never an afiurmative action student taking your spot but a rich kid who lied about being on every team and didn’t have the grades to be there.
    Great post.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Thanks Trudy. I think the focus was on the women because they are more visible in the public eye than their husbands–Huffman’s husband supposedly wasn’t involved so that says two things to me–either someone is truthfully challenged…….or….he didn’t approve of what she did and basically said to her “you’re on your own”…perhaps that’s why she didn’t follow through on child number 2.
      But Loughlin seems rather smug and I can bet she and her daughters still remain arrogantly entitled–even after losing jobs!
      I wanna see how many POC are in jail due to falsifying an address because if I was a politician, every single one of those parents would be pardoned and I would make those wealthy creeps send THEIR kids through school!
      I know people who falsified their children’s address so that their children could get into a better public school system and some were lucky. Some were not and it is gut-wrenching. There is a HUGE issue with public education in our country. It needs to change. And that’s why I’m praying to God every night that the political scene changes in 2020!!! XOXOXOXOXO

      Like

  6. Pingback: Would You Cheat for Your Children? | Atypical 60 – International Badass Activists

  7. Mary Ellen says:

    Catherine, I agree with all that you say! Moreover, how sad for these kids! I would think that a part of them knows that they didn’t do anything on their own merit. How can that make you feel proud and accomplished? I, personally, would feel very inferior if I knew my parents had to buy my way through everything. Your post is extremely well written!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hey Mary Ellen. And even sadder is that these children become even more entitled as they become more aware of the power of their parent’s fame and/or money! Thank you so much! XXOXOXO

      Like

  8. Judy says:

    Agree wholeheartedly. Those kids would have gone through life thinking they could have everything they wanted just because they have enough money to buy what should be unbuyable. Now they know. Hopefully a lesson learnt. Bravo, Catherine!.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Cathe says:

    And your children are a testimony to you as a good parent Cathe. Sadly the children of these parents have learned nothing more than entitlement.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Cathe! Thank you!!! And the parents are lousy parents who should have never given birth–I honestly don’t think there’s a lot of love there–just what money can buy!! XOXOXO

      Like

  10. patricia blaettler says:

    I have to disagree with you about FH’s plastic surgery. I saw her on TV and I couldn’t stop staring at her face. It was too too… So, in my opinion, that’s not good work. When it’s good, you shouldn’t even notice it. You should just think, wow she looks great.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Patricia! LOL!! I’m so happy you addressed her plastic surgery. You think it’s too much? Oh..I thought she looked much better. Still–I can’t stop looking at her and wondering how much she paid for it!! But you do have a point on when it’s done right you can’t tell. I’m constantly wondering if Jennifer Lopez has had it. If so, she’s had a stellar job done!! XOXOXOXO

      Like

  11. Your thoughts are spot on, Catherine. I have two daughters. The older one went to college right from high school. She worked part time all the way through, got scholarships to help pay and graduated Summa Cum Laude. My younger daughter rebelled, got pregnant and nearly drank herself to death, but….this past fall she enrolled in college, made the Dean’s list her first semester and wants to go to PA school after she gets her bachelor’s. I’ll tell you what, that girl is much more motivated as a single working mom of 26, than she ever would have been at 18. We need to guide our kids, in part by knowing them and by instilling in them the value of hard work. I don’t think kids should HAVE to go to college. It really isn’t for everyone. I don’t have a degree and my brain hasn’t dribbled out my ears…yet! Ha, ha. But, in no way, should parents hover, lie, cheat or do everything for their kids. They need to grow up, just like we all did! Thanks for sharing your thoughts! – Amy
    http://stylingrannymama.com/

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Ames–I agree with everything you wrote. Some kids–it takes a longer time to grow up. My middle guy didn’t get his degree until he was in his late twenties. We guide them is spot on. And I also agree that college isn’t for everyone. Trade and vocational schools should be on the rise for those who are great at working with their hands and don’t want the academics. It’s really sad that our country doesn’t focus on all aspects of education for our youth! XOXOXOXO

      Like

  12. No way! What has happened to morals?My granddaughter is spending 2 hours a day studying for the SATs 2 hour a day on her own. We’ve got Weinstein’s , Cosby’s, etc. I’m with you Cathe.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Sandy!!! Ohhhhhhhhhhh those SAT’s and the ACT’s. I remember PSAT classes, the stress of the SAT’s….the studying….it’s a very intense time for a child. And then to have the entitled who don’t have to raise a pen to paper or even think at all is absolutely pathetic!! XOXOXOXO

      Like

  13. Renee in Nor/Cal says:

    I feel, so much of this is driven on parental competition with each other..one up man ship….EGO! It wasn’t about what their children interests and capabilities were. Hard to wrap my head around the fact that Lori Loughlin and her husband spent $500,000. dollars to get their undeserving kids into USC…makes me nauseous, just disgusting, cray, cray. BTW, Felicity wasn’t looking fresh and flawless at Federal Court last week (what no stylist for court??) Well, at least the photos I saw on the Daily Mail. I know, I know…my guilty pleasure :))

    Like

    • Catherine says:

      Renee, I think you have a very strong point there. EGO–Narcissistic behavior!! Felicity looked awful at court–I think she is very remorseful–but too bad, she still committed a crime! XOXOXOXO

      Like

  14. I agree . No mercy 4 idiots rich ,parents. ( most of them,Lalaland celebrity-they are in title- huh.
    SHAME

    Like

  15. Maryellen Reardon says:

    Well, I will tell you I thought about this event a bit selfishly. Suddenly everyone was demeaning the Ivies – not you – as if all students are there because of privilege and cheating. My son is at Harvard Law School. He has always been brilliant, always. But he didn’t embrace it until he got to college, and then he just fell in love with learning and succeeding. He has supported himself since he graduated from college, worked his tail off for three years, studied for the exams, and then got into Harvard on his own merits. He is graduating in a month and I am so very, very proud of him. I have met many of his friends there and they all work hard and really are in awe of where they are and that they made their dreams come true. On their own.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. emjayandthem says:

    I’m not shocked but I am saddened at the behavior ~ and although they are immensely entitled imagine being a child who finds out your parents cheated to get you into school because

    Like

    • emjayandthem says:

      THEY DIDNT BELIEVE YOU COULD DO IT ON YOUR OWN. Talk about a punch in the face ~ whatever moxie I’ve got is from the unwavering belief my parents had THAT I COULD SET AND ACHIEVE GOALS

      Like

      • emjayandthem says:

        and .. yeah I wish I didnt have 3 jobs through college and remembered some of it (it was a blur) but .. I didn’t have debt either. Crazy strange story – sorry for the multiple reply posts, seems I was a lil too enthusiastic with the return/send button. 🙂 Good post, MJ

        Like

      • Catherine says:

        Hi MJ. Wait–those girls KNEW their parents were up to paying because the Loughlin daughters posed for “fake” crew pics. And as far as Huffman goes, she paid someone to take the test for her daughter. Come on–the college application process is taxing and daunting and I don’t believe for one second that those kids who are old enough to know better didn’t have a clue!!!!! XOXOXOXOXO

        Like

      • emjayandthem says:

        oh! I didn’t realize they (daughters) knew – ugh – ok I stand with you. They’re sh*theads, all of them!! 🙂 MJ

        Like

  17. Rena says:

    I’m right there with you, Catherine. The only good in all of this is that I now feel much less guilty for not having “helped” my children but instead sought to guide them to be resourceful and competent persons.

    Rena
    http://www.finewhateverblog.com

    Like

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