To Start The Memorial Day Weekend…..I Bought a One-Piece Bathing Suit!

It was one of those good days today.  No traffic on the dreaded 422.  My workload was very smooth and not one fax came back with an error.  And the office closed at 2:30. It was just that kind of day where everything falls into place.

It’s that GOOD day! You can smell the grass as it grows.  The Geraniums are blooming. Work is good. No traffic.  These are those gifted days that are so glorious!

And I was thinking about bathing suits.

Now.  If you are a regular reader of this blog, then you are well-aware of my fondness for bikinis and two- piece bathing suits.  It doesn’t matter to me that I have a soft, cushiony, marshmallow-pillow of a gut.  It does not matter in the least that my thighs jiggle like Santa’s bowl full of jelly.  No. I’m past that self-conscience stage of life.

Image result for atypical60 bikinis

I’m no hard body.  And I’m comfortable in my own skin to wear a two piece.  And there’s a reason for this.

My adoration for two-pieces stems from the fact that I have a long torso and can never fine a one-piece that fits.  They ride up the entrance between the cheeks of my derriere.  A one piece gets all gnarled up in my origin of the world.  And the one-piece usually has a waist that starts way below mine and the top usually makes me look like a porn star because it falls lower than low.

Just another obvious reason I love a good two piece. I can frug!!!

And the last time I wore a one-piece was back in 1993.  Prior to the summer, I had a “thing” taken off my chest—it was the first of many “things” that would be taken off due to sun damage.  And that bathing suit was the most uncomfortable article of clothing I’ve ever worn.

1993. Long Beach, NY. My last one-piece and it was the most uncomfortable bathing suit ever!!!

But this year I am stuck in a conundrum.  I want to protect my skin as much as possible from the sun’s harmful rays.  Let’s face it, the only areas of my body that I want tanned are my arms, legs and face Why botha with the rest of me?

Things are serious when Jim Carey looks better in a one-piece than I do!!

And while I realize that I do fake tan for the most part, I want to get a little natural color after all.  My doctor said I could.

And because my work day went so “swimmingly”, after leaving the office, I decided to drive up the road to the local TJ Maxx.  Perhaps I would have some luck at a bargain price.

Let me tell you, the pickins’ were slim.  I’m always late to the party and headed over to the clearance area.  I did find a couple of two pieces but I wasn’t in the mood for those.  By now, I really had my mind set on a one-piece bathing suit.

I found a red one that I thought was very elegant. In the cart it went.  I found a red, white and blue printed one and thought that it would make appropriate Holiday weekend attire.

And then I saw a bit of bright neon pink sticking out from the bowels of the rack.  I hustled over and plucked her off the rack.  She was adorable!  Scalloped trim top and a bow! And then I saw the tag. Kate Spade.  I saw the price $40.  Now mind you, forty dollars is quite pricey for my swim attire. I don’t think I’ve ever paid that much money on a bathing suit.  Ever.  And when I remembered I had a Visa Gift Card for twenty-five dollars, the bathing suit looked even more adorable to me.

Off to the dressing room I ran.  And began to try on the swimwear.

Who cares if the bits are jiggly and flabby?  This is an adorable bathing suit!

Right off the bat I’ll tell you, there was no way I could get the other two bathing suits up past my waist. They were that short-waisted.  My hope was waning.

But as I stepped into the pink Kate Spade, I noticed that it felt very comfortable and not tight as I moved the stretchy fabric up past my thighs.  The suit didn’t stop at the waist. It actually fit!!!

This bow and neckline did it for me!

Kate Spade must be long-waisted because the fit of this is just perfect.  I checked to see what size it was and it’s a M.  Just a plain old Medium.

This was the deal of the day!  And it fits those of us who are long-waisted!!!

Look to the left. The suits that are hanging up.  They fit absolutely horribly.  I couldn’t even get them past my waist. Who are the swimsuit companies making these for anyway???

After using the gift card, I owed $17—two of which were taxed. I hadn’t realized thatPennsylvania places a tax on swim wear.  Overall, I got a deal!  My tummy, chest and back will be protected.\

Overall, I’m a happy camper–and I love the color!!!!

When I arrived home from work, something else was waiting for me.  I ordered a pair of reading glasses.  An Instagram Ad, stating that Oprah loves these frames, made be go for it.

Center Stage - Berry, Red

*sigh* I wish I was as popular as Oprah.  But these Center Stage glasses are the Cathe’s Meow!!

Add to the fact that I really don’t want to go to the beach wearing my good eyeglasses.  I’m afraid that I will either ruin them in the sand or lose them when I fall into the ocean.

My eyesight is so awful and hasn’t improved with age.  To find the best magnifying lenses, I went to Walmart and tried their readers on.  I was a bit depressed to discover that the highest number, 300, worked for me.  May I just say that carrots do not improve your eyesight.

Anyway, I opened the box, saw a nice tweedy eyeglass case and was impressed right off the bat.  When I took the readers out, I was equally impressed.  They are of good quality and not cheaply manufactured.  The frames are huge; and I love that. They are fun.

Ever the sucker for packaging, I love this eyeglass case!  It is so tweedy!

The tortoise shell color gives a very expensive look and the fit is just fine.

Definitely impressed with these frames!!

 If you have an average to large head, these are a great choice.  If you have a very small head with small facial features, these may be a bit overpowering though.

Pardon my crossed-eyes but I’ve been in front of a computer all day!  I do dig these frames though!


These are greatness–and so much fun!

I’m channeling my inner Iris Apfel!

I highly recommend these!  Check out the website for Peepers

Whatever you do, whether it’s in a bathing suit or shorts or whatever—just have a great, great, Memorial Day Weekend!!


About Catherine

Far from perfect, but enjoying life as a non-perfect and flawed individual at 60 years young. I'm still wondering what I'll be when I grow up! The characters in my life's screenplay include my better half. He is a refined Frenchman who grew up in Paris and summered in St. Tropez. I grew up in Long Island and summered in Long Island. I am not refined. My three grown children are also a big part of my life. For their sake, they happily live where their careers have taken them! But I can still mother them from a distance! I write about the mundane. I write about deeply shallow issues. But whatever I write or muse about--it'll always be a bit on the humorous and positive side! It's all good!
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

37 Responses to To Start The Memorial Day Weekend…..I Bought a One-Piece Bathing Suit!

  1. Molly says:

    You look sensational in that suit, Catherine! Have a wonderful holiday weekend.

  2. Here in Canada I would always buy a Christina (brand name) bathing suit in the LONG version, and it fit perfectly. Even though I’m not that tall, I have a longish torso and they were so comfortable. Not sure what I’ll do now that Sears is closed as that was the only place I could find the the special Long torso ones. The pink is a lovely wow color! Enjoy your Memorial Day weekend!

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Homeplace!! Isn’t that pink a great color? I’m not a pastel girl-brights do it for me. Anyway………I feel your long-torso pain. At 5’6″ my height is just above average maybe but not so tall that my torso should be out of proportion. It never ceases to amaze me at how manufacturers seem to think every woman was born with a short torso. It’s crazy!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

  3. Bob says:

    I am a newbie here, so here is my first posted comment: one piece or two piece or whatever…looking good!! Bob

  4. You are the cat’s meow! Adore your swim suit and glasses💞

  5. Fiona says:

    1. Father Christmas has a bowl full of jelly????
    2.WTF is Jim Carrey wearing!?
    I love your new cozzie, that cerise pink is gorgeous. Do you not have tankinis in the States? (Like a halter neck t shirt and bikini bottoms?)
    Enjoy the holiday weekend. Xxx

    • Catherine says:

      Hey Fiona. YES. Santa/Father Christmas/Papa Noel. Has a belly like a bowl full of jelly! LOL. Jim Carrey is wearing a rather bizarre swim suit. It’s very strange indeed–as is he!!!
      Yes. We have tankini’s. I can’t wear them because the “tank” part falls too short on me.
      Hope you had a great weekend too. It’s over now and back to work!!! XOXOXOXO!!!

  6. vavashagwell says:

    Wow, that suit looks great on you! LOVE IT! My personal issues with swim suits are 1) small bust, and 2) long torso. I usually look for suits with a ruffle at the bust since I’m 32A (barely). And yeah, two piece suits avoid having to deal with the long torso thing! I like that high-waisted bottoms are now available, too.

    The glasses are perfect for you!!! I’m finding I need more magnification lately, I suspect my cataract is ripening! LOL. Next time I go to the eye doctor will be interesting…..

    LOL on that Jim Carrey photo. hahahahaha. Let me assure you – you look better than that!

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Vava! Thank you! Thank you for validating that we long torso women are far better off in two-pieces. Ugh. I can’t begin to tell you how difficult it is for me to find a high-waisted bathing suit bottom I wish I saved my late 80’s and early 90’s bathing suit bottoms.
      Hey–get to the eye dr. You gotta take care of those eyes!!!!!!!!!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

  7. Pingback: To Start The Memorial Day Weekend…..I Bought a One-Piece Bathing Suit! | Atypical 60 – International Badass Activists

  8. closetplayimage says:

    Love the pink! But I’d still rock the bikini! (I’m still a bikini girl, myself…)

    • Catherine says:

      Closet. A woman after my bikini girl heart. I still love a bikini too. But at the sake of protecting my skin, I figured it can’t hurt to have a one-piece in the collection! XOXOXOXO!!!!

  9. Juliet says:

    Love the one piece – it is adorable on you and pink is so cute. I bought a swimsuit (one piece) for the first time in absolute years just before a 5 day holiday with the daughter (who said I was not to wear a swimsuit NO MATTER WHAT, so I didn’t but wish I had, its not as though she even seen the swimsuit, it was just a blanket “Nope” from Miss22). I have a long torso and a bit of a bust and no waist as far as I can tell – however in the UK, M&S (who can be really hit and miss in terms of fashion) do a stellar swimsuit for long bodied women and it has built in winching – so I even have a waist and my bust is not out and flapping about, it is seriously comfortable and really well constructed… that said, after daughter banned me from taking it on holiday, I noticed females of all ages/sizes etc wearing far less on the beaches of Rhodes – no one gave a hoot and dang, as long as people are happy and doing whatever they do they all looked absolutely fine.

    The swimsuit I bought is here if there are any UK readers interested … but there are plenty of other shaping ones, they are superb..

    • Catherine says:

      Juliet. Those M & S swimsuits are great and the price is fantastic. We’re so limited here in the States. And I say limited because the majority of swimsuits are almost topping the one hundred dollar mark. It’s a disgrace! I’ve gotten great bikinis in France for 12 euros.
      The other thing is, here in the States, people are so ridiculously modest–if I went topless someone would call the police. Summertime!!!! XOXOXOXOXO!!!

  10. TURNER says:

    I just returned a suit to JCrew yesterday because it was too long in the torso. I guess we all have our struggles, hehe. That dark pink color is fantastic!

    • Catherine says:

      Turner! You’re kidding me! I’ll have to check out J. Crew’s swimwear. Was the bust padded? I need pads in the bustline or they sag too much!! LOL!! XOXOXOXO!!!

  11. L says:

    I did some serious damage at TJ Maxx and Marshall’s today. LOVE the suit. As a fellow LT (Long Torso) I have never been able to find one that fits. Remember when bodysuits with snaps were in fashion? They were TORTURE! 🙂

    • Catherine says:

      L!!! O. M. G. Those snapped bodysuits were the worst! I would have a wedgie from front all the way to the back. Those were not made for long torsos at all!!!!! A trip to Marshall’s is desperately needed by me–haven’t been in ages!!!! XOXOXOXO!!!

  12. Liz McGarry says:

    I love your suit! And those glasses…FABULOUS! Have you ever tried Zenni Optical? It’s an online eyeglass company where you can get prescription glasses for a VERY reasonable price…single vision as well as progressives. And, they make clip-on sunglasses for $3.95…AND you can have anything up to 15 characters printed in almost any color on the outside of the arms…Very cool. I’m 73 years old and I keep finding inspiration in your posts…keep it up!
    We are not elderly…we are elders!

    • Catherine says:

      Hi My Little Elderberry!!! Hey Liz–I’m going to have to check out that Zenni Optical and I wear progressives too!! Thank you–I’m glad to be of inspiration! And my continued prayers for your husband are always in rotation!! XOXOXOXO!!!!

      • Liz McGarry says:

        Thanks for your prayers and support…even though we’ve never met I feel as if I know you well…you always give me a lift. And, yes, do check out Zenni…I just got a pair of pretty swell frames (no rx.) for $3.95 on sale…🤓

  13. heididonner says:

    You look fantastic in that bathing suit!

  14. bluetulips says:

    Love everything about that bathing suit and you look fabulous. You got a bargain, I was curious and looked on the Kate Spade website it is $127 in black. Love a bargain!!!!

  15. I LOVE your new swimsuit – it is perfect and you look fabulous in it!

  16. doodletllc says:

    Love the Kate Spade suit on you, Catherine. The color is wow, the fit is excellent and the price is great. It is very flattering…perfect for France(!) TJ’s often delivers and when it does you have to jump in feet first.

    • Catherine says:

      Hi Jeanne! Thank you–but it won’t make the trip to France this summer. Because of my job we’re passing this year and staying home. We’ll be in Paris in November though and I won’t be wearing a bathing suit!! Tee hee! But you’re right–you see something at TJ’s grab it and run because it won’t be on the racks for long!!! XXOXOXOXO!!!!

  17. OMG … .sooooo cute in pink bathing suit!
    You are the bravest and most authentic n sharing your real self…..thank you.
    I’m shy about showing my white freckled blue veined legs AND I don’t want to wax cuchiepop area. I’m good in a sundress.
    But if you got it flaunt it… go girl
    Chris D

  18. Love the blog!!

  19. You are Awesome!! Check out SantaBarbaraSwim.Com

Leave a Reply