The (S)Tory of the Boots From Hell

Posted on January 10, 2018 by Catherine

We all have that one item in our wardrobe.  The item from Hell.  It’s akin to the lemon of a car that you may have had years ago before the lemon law went into effect.

It’s true. Cars aren’t the only lemons.  We all have that one item of clothing that is the bane of our existence.

It could be an expensive coat that, for some reason is always ripping in a certain spot at the seam or has buttons that continually fall off. It could be a pair of pants that you love but for some reason, the hem keeps getting undone.

You get the picture—right?

Well, for me, it’s a certain pair of boots. A pair of Tory Burch boots.  And if I hadn’t spent a good amount of money on them, I would have tossed them in the trash a long time ago.

These are the boots.  And they have been nothing short of a headache since I purchased them back in 2012!  But they’re just so beautiful!

But—I spent a lot of money on these horrific excuse of designer boots.  And they are, hands down, the worst pair of garbage that I ever overspent on—even when I made the purchase at Nordstrom Anniversary Sale six years ago.

 

I’m not kidding. These boots are like that old boyfriend  you know is so bad but you just can’t get rid of….

Let me explain.  I wanted a nice rich Cognac brown pair of riding boots that would lend itself well to my beloved Kooba Sloane Bag.  Now mind you, I absolutely love my Kooba Sloane.  I’ve had her for about eleven years—possibly twelve.  This bag is not only pleasing to the eye, but it is well-constructed, strong as all get-out and fits a good amount of my “stuff”.    I had seen this bag but it was just way out of my affordability radar at the time.  Retailing for $645, and me, being a divorced mother with one child away in college and two children home at school, it was out of reach.

However, I got lucky.  The bag ended up on sale at Neiman Marcus and I had a gift card.  I ended up paying $200 for it—a treat for my birthday.  This is the bag that survived a child throwing up all over it on a flight back from France.  She’s survived storms and house moves.  Kooba was over my shoulder as I went through menopause and my divorce.  She was also with me for my first Colonoscopy—of which the doctor said “Nice bag—my wife was eyeing that”.

And the more she ages, the better the leather looks.  And  years later, the bag still receives compliments.

She’s been puked on, thrown around in cars, gone through so much with me, yet, she gets better with age. My Kooba Sloane has been aging gracefully!

Anyway, I wanted a pair of boots that would best match the color of my Sloane bag simply because I have a “thing” for matching my footwear to my bags. And after  years of searching in vain, that special pair of boots was found during a Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2012.

What other boots?  My crossed eyes only saw the Nadine boots from Tory Burch.  They were so stunning and the perfect color!

The Tory Burch “Nadine” boots, which, I believe were inclusive to Nordies.  (Read this review from the blog To Brighten My Day )

It was a perfect time to make the purchase.  I had a job at a healthcare company and was making a decent salary.  The retail price was $495 USD and with the deep discount of the infamous Nordstrom Anniversary Sale, I purchased the boots for $300.  Mind you, I had never made such an expensive boot purchase before in my life and since then, never have.

My circle of boot friends!  And none of the boots were as expensive as the Tory Burch Nadine boots.  And none ever needed as much repair!

I’ll spend more on my leather Longchamp bags but not boots.  And so, this was a big deal for me.

The boots were a bit snug with heavier jeans, but since the majority of my jeans are skinny ones, it was no big deal.  The foot of the boot looked really clumsy too.  The way it was constructed just made my foot look three sizes larger, and at an 8 ½, I don’t want bigger feet. But it didn’t matter.  The color was perfect and I liked the hardware.

And so, the saga of the Boots from Hell began.

During the fall into winter of 2012, I finally got to wear the boots.  Since purchasing the boots in August, I hadn’t been able to wear them due to the warm weather.  The first time I wore these really pricey boots, they were the most uncomfortable footwear, next to the Tory Burch Reva flats, I had ever put  my narrow feet into.  Now—I was able to accept the uncomfortable factor simply because after breaking my Reva flats in, they were extremely comfortable. I figured it would be the same thing for the boots.

I should have earned my lesson after breaking in Tory Burch Reva flats. It took forever to break these shoes in–but years later, they are comfortable.  Might I mention the tunic in this photo? It’s also Tory Burch and the stitching on the bottom is already becoming undone.  Never again, Tory. Never again!

Wrong.

My narrow foot was swimming within the  width of the boot.  To drive my car, I had to take the right boot off—it was like having my foot and leg in a thick cardboard box.  But the boots were the perfect color.  Walking in the boots was just as bad.  Being clumsy by nature, walking in these was turning my clumsiness into a fine art.

After two wears, I placed these boots back into the box and didn’t take them out until 2014. I just could not bring myself to return them.

Now it’s 2014. I gained a bit of weight.  Like—everywhere.  But—the cooler weather was great for wearing boots.  The boots wouldn’t zip up.  Even with skinny jeans.  I had no idea that with a weight gain, the boots wouldn’t fit.  But they were the perfect color—and that hardware.  Since I paid $300 for the boots, there was no way I was going to try to zip these beauties up and risk breaking the zipper.

Image result for atypical 60 boots

Honest to God, with the weight gain, this was as far that I could zip the boots up. And I didn’t even try because I didn’t want to ruin the boots. Into the closet they went. Unworn for almost two years.

Now it’s 2016. Fall.  I lost weight and was continuing to lose weight. On a whim, I took out the boots.  They fit again.  They zipped up beautifully while wearing skinny jeans and even more beautifully with Pixie Pants and dresses.  With my Kooba Sloane bag eagerly anticipating her booty buddies, I made them a perfect match.  Then I forgot that these boots were a bitch to break in.

At this point, I didn’t care how long it would take to break these in.  Finally, in late winter, the leather in these incredibly stiff leather boots wore in, and the boots were more comfortable. The foot part still looked ridiculously big but it didn’t matter. The color was perfect.

Late winter, the boots are finally broken in and are looking good with my Longchamp bag while Sloane takes a break in bag rotation.

Winter left, Spring came around and as I was getting ready to zip up my boots, I noticed that the zipper pull had a crack in it.  And when I pulled up the zipper, the pull broke.  WTF?  How cheaply made was the hardware on these boots?  You need to understand, I take very good care of my shoes and my boots.  I’ve had shoes for over ten years that still look like new.  I’m very particular.

 

I couldn’t believe it.  How could a piece of hardware break when the boots have been in the closet longer than on my feet?

The zipper pull also had the “Tory Burch” logo cut into it.  I took the boots to the Tory Burch boutique at the King of Prussia Mall.  I thought that perhaps since the pull was a TB logo perhaps they could repair the boot gratis. This was such a difficult thing for me to do because I was emotionally scarred from a previous trip to the Tory Burch Boutique at KOP Mall.  (Read my review of this horrific store:  My Review of Tory Burch store on Google). True to Tory Burch Corporate Culture, I was treated as though I was a dried up, bloodied human sized scab that was now oozing pus.  When I finally approached Miss Mainline Sales Assistant and explained my conundrum.  She ever-so-smugly smirked and said. “We don’t do repairs”.

How I looked going into the Tory Burch Boutique

How the snotty Tory Burch sales assistant saw me.

Off to Nordstrom I went.  Luckily, Nordstrom was able to send the boots out to be repaired. I was told that it would take some time for the boot to be repaired. But at this point my reaction was “Fine.”

Did I mention that it took three months to get the boots back?  Thankfully, I had them repaired during the summer months.

Fall 2017.  The boots are repaired, the zipper is beautiful and the match is perfect.  It was well-worth the $15 I had to pay for the repair, but the aggravation was priceless. The color of the boots has also darkened somewhat over the years, making them an even better match for my Kooba Sloane.

Happily in my Tory Burch boots again–and my Kooba Sloane is thrilled!

I’ve been happy wearing these boots.  Yes. The foot part still looks too big but I no longer have to take the boots off when I drive and they are broken in to perfection with the exception of the clumsy looking foot.

And then it happened.  Two weeks ago.  I went to zip up the left boot and it wouldn’t budge after being zipped up halfway.  Now—I know I put on holiday weight, but not enough that these friggin’ boots would no longer fit. Besides—the leather stretched a bit over the years.  I tugged again. Nothing.

I took the boot off and noticed it.  You know the fabric part of the zipper?  Where it meets the actually zipper?  It was torn.  Big time.

At this point, I wanted to throw the boots in the trash.  But I couldn’t bring myself to do it.  I had a moral dilemma here.  Thousands of customers take advantage of the Nordstrom return policy.  Why couldn’t I?  Regardless of my past gig selling handbags, I was still a customer.  Regardless of the fact the boots were purchased in 2012 and I had worn them on and off.  Regardless of the fact they were sent out by Nordstrom to get repaired.  My dilemma was—do I return, or send back out for repair.

What will happen?  Will I return the boots only to be denied?  Will I be able to have these boots from Hell repaired–or will the repair request be denied?

And off I went to Nordstrom. I’ll tell you, I felt bad. I’m not a returner. But what happened was very interesting.  The shoe department at Nordstrom is always fully-staffed. It wasn’t when I took the boots in.  Sitting in a chair was a salesman (I’m being sexist), he looked bored so I decided to brighten up his day.  I explained that I used to work at Nordies and that I wasn’t a serial returner because I couldn’t stand serial returners and then I explained about the boots.  Let me tell you something right now.  Nordstrom prides itself on great customer service.  This guy was a real tool.  Apparently, the only person who could have helped me was the manager who was on an hour break.  I was offered no assistance and no help, which was pissing me off because I know Nordstrom’s stellar customer policies very well. Yes!  This less-than-stellar service was now at Nordstrom!

With a sigh I went over to the handbag department.  The assistant manager, Jamie, that I used to work for is now the manager. And I love her. So together we set out to find the original sales transaction.  But the problem was that we couldn’t find it.  Nordstrom overhauled their credit cards  and policies last year and everyone was given a new number. Add to that, I don’t think I used a Nordstrom card. I think I used my bank debit card.  No problem, after some laughs and good conversation, not only did I realize that I missed Jamie, but I decided to just get the damned boots repaired.  Again.

Back to the boot department.   I was directed to the designer area because Tory Burch’s cheaply made boots are “designer”.   Why couldn’t “tool man” tell me that in the first place? This time around I got lucky. Jasmine, the designer sales assistant was a doll.  She took down all the needed information about the boots, assured me that there was a chance that the boots could not be repaired because Nordstrom changed their repair policy but they would be sent out for assessment.  She gave me my receipt and I was miserably on my way.

In addition, when I handed the boots over, I noticed a little hardware screw was missing from the back of the boot.  When I pointed it out, I was told that couldn’t be replaced.

If Nordstrom cannot repair the Boots from Hell, I will bring them to a local shoe repair to see if they can do the job.  If Nordstrom can repair the boots, I’m sure the cost will be about $50 to $60 as the entire zipper will have to be repaired.  This will bring the price of the $300 plus $15 for the zipper pull repair up to almost $400.  Some big sale item.

Lesson learned?  Don’t buy Tory Burch boots. Not now. Not ever. Never.  And stick to the less expensive brands.  Today I’m wearing a pair of boots that I also purchased at Nordstrom. The boots are the Ellerby Riding Boots from Enzo Angiolini and I paid around a hundred bucks for them back in 2014.  They are comfortable.  They have never needed a repair. They are beautifully constructed. And the brown trim on the top makes for a great match to my Kooba Sloane Bag.

These Ellerby boots from Enzo Angiolini are some of the best boots I own.  They are Bonaparte’s favorites!  Always looking sharp, I can wear them with my Kooba Sloane or any black bag.  And they were far less expensive that the Tory Burch boots!

What about you?  Do you have that item from Hell in your possession?  Do you have that overpriced item that you can’t part with or realize was a mistake from the get-go?  Tell me. Please! I gotta know! We all need to know!!!

It’s a shame that one pair of boots could cause such stress—and I’m singing “Shame, Shame Shame” today. Remember this from Shirley and Company?

 

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You Highlighter Up My Life! Highlighting the Mature Face

Posted on January 9, 2018 by Catherine

I have to say, I felt as though I was channeling my inner Mrs. Kravitz this morning!

I need to get out of the house more often because I am turning into Mrs. Kravitz–the iconic nosy neighbor!

Chippy ran to the front window barking like crazy and then I spotted lights.  Lights from a police car and lights from a fire engine. They were parked in front of the empty townhouse across the street.

Not a scene that is familiar to my eyes–so you can just imagine what was going on in that imaginative mind of mine!

Naturally, my stress and anxiety levels were getting the better of me as I opened up the slots from the upstairs blinds to keep watch of what was going on.  But it was too much for me, I had to go outside to find out what the commotion was about.

My curiosity was piqued!

So out to the tundra, without a coat and slipping and sliding on the ice only to yell in my Long Island accent to the police “Hey!!!  What’s goin’ on?”  “Is there a murderer or robber somewhere around here?”.  My voice carries so three cops came running over to me to quickly explain that the alarm went off due to a water pipe that had burst.  They assured me that everything was okay and that the owner was on his way.

Hey–I never said I was discreet.  Luckily it wasn’t a murderer nor was it a robber. It was a busted water pipe.  Beware the winter!

And all day the empty townhouse has been full of activity with plumbers and the owner and God-only-knows who else.

You would think that excitement would be the highlight of my day.  It wasn’t.

Instead, I was asking myself “Which highlighter will I use today?”

I know.  I know.  I’m sure many of you are wondering just why a woman with a wrinkled, soon-to-be-63-years-old face would make an attempt to highlight and draw attention to any area of an aging visage.  Hold on.  Highlighters aren’t our enemy!

They can actually give us a luminous glow if used properly.

Let’s discuss.  Pictured below are five highlighters that I use. Each serves a particular purpose.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

From top left clockwise.  Wet n’ Wild Megaglo Illuminating Palette; Fenty Beauty Trophy Wife; NARS Albatross, NYX Bright Idea Illuminating Stick; Revolution Vivid Baked Highlighter.

And here’s what they look like opened.

Now–although I’m not a fan of powders because they tend to make my skin look drier than it is,  the powdered highlighters aren’t ashy nor do they have a drying effect.  I’m pretty sure that is because they are applied with an extremely light touch!

I use this fan brush by Morphe. It is $5.00 on their website and I got it in a brush set.  It’s an okay brush–not the greatest and not the worst!

On my arm.  Bottom to Top.  Wet ‘n Wild Megaglo; Fenty Beauty Trophy Wife; NARS Albatross; NYX Bright Idea Illuminating Stick; Revolution’s Highlighter

As you can see, the differences are obvious in the colors and the illumination with NYX and Revolution’s highlighters coming in very similar.

Wet ‘n Wild’s Megaglo.  As a highlighter, the color came across on my arm dark.  When applied with a brush,  the product gives a lighter glow.  Personally, I like using this during the summer as a shimmery under-the-brow bone shadow.  It doesn’t show up that much on the cheeks but still, it isn’t bad.  At $4.99 it is a very good value if you want a very subtle highlight.

Blended all together or swiped with a brush separately to be used as  eye shadow, this product does come off best as a shadow.  However, if you are looking for the most subtle hint of color on the cheekbones, this is still a great value.

Fenty Beauty Trophy Wife:  Beware. This is not for the faint of heart.  I love Trophy Wife and on evenings out with Bonaparte, I’ll also apply to my eyes as a shadow. The golden color is beautiful.  But–I think it is more beautiful on darker complexions and when you have a tan.  A little bit of this goes a long, long, long, way–use sparingly! Retailing at $34, it may seem pricey but when you take into consideration how long it will last–it’s very affordable!

If you want a super golden glow, then Trophy Wife is your product. 

Look up high on my cheekbone and you’ll see the golden glow from Trophy Wife. I’m sorry that the lighting sucked and I was unable to get better pics.

I also have an extremely light application of Trophy Wife on my nose and Cupid’s bow.

NARS Albatross:  This has been around for quite some time.  Although white in color, when applied correctly, it gives a gentle shimmer. At $30, the cost is less than Trophy Wife but this works well with fair skin tones.  I like this a lot and use it more in the winter than the summer.

The shelf life says 24 months and I’m coming up on that time, but this is still in great shape and there’s plenty left.

Ugh. I wish I was successful enough as a blogger that I had a photographer. But I’m not so you’ll have to bear with me–lol!!  I’m wearing Albatross in this photo. It is illuminating but I think from the angle and with the lighting it looks really bright.  But–the great thing is it doesn’t dry out my already dry skin. It really does give a nice sheen!

NYX Bright Idea Illuminating Stick in Lavender Lust.  A creamy and absolutely beautiful illuminating highlighter, this is, hands down, my absolute favorite!  At $8.00 this is the best value and the product doesn’t fail. I wear this almost every day.  This stays put, it blends in beautifully with blush and really gives the most natural glow to the face!  I love this!!

The stick looks more pink in this photo but really is a true lavender IRL.  I can’t say enough about this because it is my favorite. I’m a big fan of creams and this doesn’t fail!

I had to play around with the angles but from straight on, you can’t even tell that I have this highlighter on my nose–it shows up when I bend my head down. It doesn’t look lavender either. You can also see a bit of this creamy sheen on my cheekbone!

Here it is on my cheek. So subtle and glowy and pretty.  A great deal for eight bucks!

Revolution Vivid Baked Highlighter.  Retailing at $6.00, I think I paid three dollars on clearance.  This comes in second to the NYX for me.  The color goes on very similar to the NYX, but I do prefer the cream–it’s more blendable.  But still, this isn’t a bad highlighter and the pale color is very all-tone friendly.

Revolution’s Vivid Highlighter.  It’s not bad at all.  I’m wondering how this will work out during the summer months with a tan. When the humidity is high and the face sweats, sometimes the powders are a better choice!

 

Revolution’s Vivid Highlighter. So subtle you can’t even tell I’m wearing it.  But the difference between this and the NYX is that I prefer the cream.

I honestly can’t recall ever using highlighter with the exception of Revlon’s Face Gleamer–I remember having this in high school and using it as a blush. And I also remember that I loved it.  Why did Revlon ever discontinue it?

Image result for revlon's face gleamer

It’s Lauren Hutton!!!!!!!  Revlon needs to reissue this Face Gleamer!

As we age, it’s fun to be opened to products that can give us that glow we used to have.  Not a moon glow, and not that “special” glow we get after too much wine.  Just a subtle natural glow and highlighting gives that back to us.  We just need to know how to apply it to best suit our needs!

Here’s a great video from Wayne Goss–if you haven’t watched his videos yet, start now.  He’s addictive. I love this guy!

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Atypical60 Looks at the Golden Globe Awards and Why Oprah Should Run for President

Posted on January 8, 2018 by Catherine

Where do I begin with this one?  First of all, if you’ve read my past posts on Hollywood awards events, you know that, a. I’m not a “celebrity” person and b. I live to watch these awards to drool over great ensembles and to snark over the tacky ones.  Actually, it’s the tacky and tasteless that warm my heartless the most.

I would have been better off in France at the Cannes Film Fesitval. What is this dress made of?  Honeycomb cereal? Popcorn? 3-D Tic-Tac-Toe boards?  Only Larisa Katz, the designer knows.  But this is what I live for–the truly tacky ensembles and last night’s Golden Globe awards were such a disappointment!

Today I’m nursing a serious case of deep GERD-related indigestion due to the over-the-top amount of chili and cheese laden nachos that I gluttonously wolfed down during last night’s presentation.  I think it was more of a stress-eat than anything else.

The Golden Globes are now officially to blame for my overeating last night and destroying my diet. 

I was stressed because there was no tackiness.  No flamboyance.  No excitement.  Wait!  I have a caveat here—Oprah’s speech was the only excitement but I’ll get to that later.

And where was Bjork?  I’ll bet she would have worn a black swan dress—even THAT would have been more exciting!

I knew I was in deep trouble when I started watching “Countdown to the Golden Globes” on the E! Channel.  Always late with “celebrity news”, I had no inkling that all the very serious and “humble” actors would be wearing black in support of the #metoo movement.

At first, I thought “Who died” because everyone looked like they were going to a fancy funeral for a very important fashion designer.

Then when I saw the little clip of Debra Messing calling out E! for not paying one of their female entertainment reporters the same salary as her male counterpart, I knew at that moment the self-righteousness of the entertainment industry and not entertainment as an escape would be the topic of the evening.

Trust me, I’m all for equality–but the subject has it’s time and place. Debra. Don’t bite the hand that’s giving you exposure to enjoy the salary you already make–and might I remind you that salary puts you above the 0ne percent that the entire country is making.

Now—don’t get me wrong.  I’m all for equality in pay.  Based on education and skills and knowledge, the pay scale should be adjusted.  But the question remains—was the female reporter in question as adept and qualified as the male she was working with.  And this subject goes deeper and deeper because these days, corporations are trying to get away with paying all employees less in salary while demanding more of their time.

Besides—there is a time and a place for everything and Messing’s timing was way off on those comments. It was tacky—and it wasn’t the tacky I was so looking forward to.

You know who Messing should have called out?  Her makeup artist.  Her shadow wasn’t even blended correctly!! Now THAT’S a crime!!!!

Honestly, I should have turned the TV off when the most gorgeous Catherine Zeta-Jones was being interviewed.  Bonaparte and I were enjoying our aperitifs and at the same time turned to each other with “How much more full of herself can this woman be before she vomits from her own self-fullness?”

Catherine. You are now part of the “mature woman” demographic. You need those Golden Globes of yours placed in a bra with a bit of lift.  The truth may hurt your over-filled ego but your cups need a little filling!

My Frenchman went upstairs after dinner and I was left to watch the Golden Globes tout seul.

My Frenchman left me to watch the Golden Globes alone!  That’s almost as scary as watching “It” or “The Shining” by myself!

So, let me give you my opinion on the Golden Globes 2018.

Seth Meyers.  You are a nice guy. You have a nice way.  You were one of my favorites on SNL Weekend Update.  However, your hosting was boring.  Hey. I understand. It was through no fault of yours.  You were most likely a “safe” host and you were.  I want Ricky Gervais back.

Seth–even that joke about Weinstein was too tame for my taste. I want Gervais back and I want him back funnier and more acerbic than ever!!!!!

For chrissakes, these celebrities take themselves almost as seriously as that one in the White House calls himself a genius.  Lighten up.  Get a sense of humor.  Laugh at yourself.  Gervais would have done a far better job and had gotten plenty of laughs.  But nooooooooooooooooo . The tone had to be maudlin so we could how serious the evening was.  The black attire wasn’t enough.

And speaking of black attire, let’s look at some of the dresses.

Kate Hudson.  I have news for you Kate, the netting on my Weave-A-Wig would have made a better dress.  Couldn’t your stylist have gotten you something more attractive? On the other hand, you do look cute with short hair.

Kate Hudson’s Weave-a-Wig dress…

The netting on the Weave-a-Wig helps to keep the wig secured when sewn in.  This would have come in very handy for the security of Hudson’s dress had the top been made with Weave-a-Wig netting.  Bobbi Boss may have a side business in awards dressing!

Halle Berry.  I’m giving props to Halle as one of the GG’s Best-dressed.  She wore a short dress and I am a sucker for shorter dresses.   I also like “long-haired Halle” better.  She has killer legs and that dress showed those gams off to perfection.  My only criticism is that she should have worn pointy-toed, cleavage, bearing heels instead.

Halle Berry gets my nod for one of the evening’s best dressed.  I don’t think she’ll fail the pencil test for a bra the way Zeta-Jones will.  I’m putting this photo on the fridge to stop me from eating.  But WTF is with all the see-through dresses?

My other criticism. What’s with the see-through dresses?  Seriously.  I can’t stand see-through clothing—it has nothing to do with modesty either. Hell, I go topless on the beaches in France so to some I’m most likely the most immodest woman on earth.  But the see-through dresses are just not attractive. On anyone.

Dakota Johnson.  Hands down.  The best dressed of the night.  I can’t even with the back of that gown.  And the cut and style—everything about her look was just so beautiful. And in a sea of boredom, she stood out even more beautifully than ever!

This dress literally took my breath away.  Seriously, she should have saved this for the Oscars because this is an Oscar-worthy dress.  OMG. I am in love with this.   Kate Hudson needs to hire Dakota Johnson’s stylist. So does Zeta-Jones!

Angelina Jolie.  Angie. Angie. Angie.  Do I have to fly to Brignoles, France and knock on your door to tell you how disappointed I was in your Globes attire?  Come on. You are the most beautiful woman on earth and you wore a get up that was far too matronly.  Dayum. I’m almost 63 years old and I wouldn’t wear that granny outfit.  Bring back that infamous dress with the high slit you wore to the Oscars a few years back!

Whoever this Just Jared is, I want to thank him for taking the greatest GG pics!  Angie.  Why?  Why are you dressing in a dress that Totie Fields or Phyllis Diller would have worn.  This is not you.  Go back to the slits. Please.

Emma Watson.  No. Just. No. If you are aspiring to look Amish, come to my house and I’ll drive you to Lancaster County, PA. It’s just a half-hour away from me.

Emma, you played Belle.  Why wear a dress that is a cross between an Amish ball gown and one that looks like those weird ears on a lizard–the sleeves.  No. Just. No!

Mandy Moore.  Thank you so much for adding a splash of color by wearing a red sash.  But you should have worn your hair down.

I love that splash of red over the drab black gown.  There’s too much material on the bottom of this one.

What?  Are you trying to look like the lady in the American Gothic painting?  The hair is too severe for your bone structure.  A looser pulled back look would have been stunning!

And Mandy. Don’t ever wear your hair pulled back like that again. It’s too severe for your beautiful face.  You need a loose look to soften the angles. I know this.  I have a very square face.

Frances McDormand.  BINGO!!  My second-favorite look of the evening!  She wore Navy Blue!  Frances McDormand is not only the best actress (Yes. I’m being sexist by calling her out as an actress because I’m separating the sexes.  She is better than any male actor.), but she’s a rebel by wearing blue in that black sea of fashion  boredom. McDormand is the reason I watched the Golden Globes. I was dying to see her win because she was so great in Three Billboards. And she did win.

First of all, I was thrilled she won because her performance in Three Billboards was stellar.  Secondly, just the fact she wore navy proved she has more balls than all those combined of the men in the audience!  Add to that, there is nothing phony or pretentious about this woman.  She is comfortable with no makeup. Oh I love her.  I’m even giving her a pass on the Eileen Fisher “style” of the dress. She’s still my second-best dressed of the evening.  Go you, Frances–and you better win that Oscar!

How could anyone not love her? She offered to buy Tequila shots for all her fellow women nominees.  Damn. I wish I was there! I wish I was nominated for a Golden Globe! Her speech, although who knows why she was bleeped so many times, was the best.  The woman exhibited a sense of humor that was surely lost during the rest of the event!

And speaking of those black dresses.  Do people not realize that RED is a more empowering color?  Hell yes!  If I were there I would have worn my red heels. Red is a more “in your face” color.  Black fades in with the background.  Isn’t it better to wear a more empowering color and one for hope rather than a color associated with the maudlin and death?

If I were at the Golden Globes, MY symbolic dress would have been red high heels because I could stamp out the abuse and discrimination. I would have worn jeans as an homage to all the normal, middle and lower, working class women who can’t afford designer duds!  THAT symbolism would have been more believable. Red. It is an empowering color!

Think about it.

Let me tell you something.  I’m a #metoo. As are most women. And we’ve all had our share of abuse, hardship, bullying and discrimination from men.  But nobody brings up the white elephant in the room about the abuse coming from other women.  Have any of you ever worked with a female boss or supervisor who was totally abusive?  I’ll bet you did because I know that I wasn’t the only one.

Boss GIF

Yes. I’ve been the smart fat girl, and have also suffered my share of abuse and discrimination from a woman superior.  So let’s talk equality–OK???

Have you ever seen the shaming that women exhibit towards other women on social media?  Men aren’t the only abusers or purveyors of harassment.  And it’s one thing to give a fun and tongue-in-cheek assessment of what women are wearing on the awards shows.  But to viciously attack someone for going against the wearing o’ the black is another. And Twitter was rife with McDormand Shaming! Not cool. Not cool at all.

There is, however, hope for all of us.  And that hope comes in the form of Oprah Winfrey.  Although Reese Witherspoon’s introduction had me eye-rolling because I just wanted her to shut up and hand the award and mike over to Oprah, as soon as Winfrey took to the podium.  I knew it would be one of the best moments of the evening.

This.  This. Hope + Oprah. Hoprah.  The artist who created this is a genius!

And it was.  For her to win the Cecil B. DeMille award was a shining moment and my girl Oprah had me at “Linoleum”.  Here’s the link Oprah’s Acceptance Speech.

Oprah needs to run for President of These United States in 2020.  And here’s just a few reasons why.

Oprah.  Our next President?  Let’s hoprah so!  Note to Bobbi Boss wigs–can you create a wig just like Oprah’s hair style?  I want this. 

The world loves and adores her.  She would be an exemplary example of a great leader in foreign policy.

She has a book club!  She would make America read again!

Oprah. Are you reading this?  Can I send my book to you when completed?  You’ll make America READ again–and we need that!

We can all, as an overweight nation relate. She’s knows the weight loss struggle is real.

Image result for oprah wagon of fat

Oprah. I remember the day you did this. I watched your show religiously.  I struggle too. we all struggle with our weight!!

She can give a bad-ass speech better than anyone!

She is a great actor—and that counts when one must remain calm.  She will be able to channel her inner calm acting skills when her nerves are put to the test.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh.she’s good.  Just like her soup.

Ohhhh..That’s Good.  Soup!  Soup! Is there nothing this woman can’t do? 

She is intelligent and smart. And she made the rise from journalist to—OPRAH!!!!!!

She is a humanist.

She can get the entire country out to vote—and vote for her.  OMG—the Republicans and their electoral collage wouldn’t stand a chance!!!!

Maybe she will give all of us new cars!

She is hope!

Steadman would make a fine “First Man”

Steadman would be a great First Man.  Maybe I can be hired as his secretary.  I mean, he’ll have to have someone handle his schedule because President Winfrey will be busy with world issues and……

I know—there’s much talk about Oprah in 2020. And I’ve been reading many tweets and such about the fact she isn’t a politician.  But—how do you think this successful woman became so successful.  She knows her politics and she would be so much better than what we have now.

We need a woman in the White House.  We need Oprah.  We need her in 2020!

Look how presidential Oprah looks.  Oprah. Please run for President.  Please…….

#ImwithOprah

PS.  A lot good the black dresses did when Greta Gerwig wasn’t even nominated for best director.  That just proves women have far more to do than wear a black dress to get their point across.

Here we have a talented woman director and no nomination.  Hmmmm..looks like you’ll need more than black dresses to get the point across!

Speaking of talented women, I did another review–and this is of the Bobbi Boss Weave-a-Wig!  How appropriate! (watch Chippy in the background)

 

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I May Not Be a Very Ethical Shopper. But I Try to Be An Ethical Person

Posted on January 7, 2018 by Catherine

A few days back I was reading a blog post that one of my favorite bloggers wrote.  The blog is High Heels in the Wilderness and the blog is written by Susan Burpee.  Susan is a Canadian who writes beautifully. That’s why I like her blog. She’s no BS.  She tells a story and tells it very well.  She’s not boring. She’s not pretentious. She’s just really nice and that niceness comes across in her blog.

Anyway, the post  is Is It Possible to Be An Ethical Shopper.  After reading the post, and the links she added within the post and which I read, it got me to thinking.

Thinking about how ethical I’m not—as far as shopping goes.   Susan is way more ethical than I am.

Ehhhh.  I may not be an ethical shopper, but perhaps if the sustainable clothing  made by “ethical” companies brought their price points down, maybe more of us would be ABLE to be more ethical in our consumerism.

Allow me to give you my view on this…

When I lived in Manhattan, oftentimes I passed the School for Ethical Culture.  The school always intrigued me because I thought to myself “Who the hell needs to go to school to be taught ethical behavior or ethical culture?

Honestly, I used to really think–“Why is there a school for Ethical Culture”?Being ethical and ethics have always interested me. I looked up a couple of “proper” meanings of the word and got ……  involving or expressing moral approval or disapproval ethical judgments, as well as …conforming to accepted standards of conduct ethical behavior.

Now, in my simple-minded way, to be ethical is to do the right thing. Am I being kind? Am I being a decent person?  Am I trying to be a better person?  Am I making an effort to be socially aware? Do I have a good work ethic?

Yes.  And in my simple and ethical way, I’m also polite–but like Ed Helms, don’t test my politeness!

Ethics is just a part of one’s value system.  As a mother, I may not have ever been perfect and boy I have more faults than the Sierra Madre mountain range. But, I taught my children values and meshed in with the values are ethics.  My three kids have stellar work ethics, they are ridiculously socially aware, they all volunteer and exhibit far better ethical behavior than I do.

Well, we are the way we are because of our values and ethics!

Be that as it may, I am very particular about my work ethic.  When I was working, my ethics were excellent.  I did the job and followed through to completion.  I stayed to finish a task.  Oftentimes I didn’t take a lunch break, I arrived early every day and did my best to stay out of office politics.

And these days ethics in business is practically an oxymoron!

 But back to everyday ethics. Before throwing out any old clothing, I will give those clothes the once over and wash and iron them before taking them to the Goodwill for resale.  I would say that’s trying to be an ethical person.

Surprisingly, my cosmetics and skincare shopping are more ethical than I imagined.  I was actually pretty happy to find that many of the items we put on our faces are made here and in Canada!

I was happy to see that Vivant Skincare and….

…Skinactives are made in the USA.  You can see that I use this a lot by the shape of the jar. 

A great Canadian import..

As is The Ordinary’s products!

At $8.00, Hard Candy Primers, which are made in The States, are an excellent value and buy..

Praise be to God.  Fenty’s Trophy Wife is made in Canada!

Now this is interesting, the photofocus foundation from Wet n Wild is made in the USA, but filled in Mexico!

My favorite eyeshadow palette from Mally is made in China–but the quality is great!

Urban Decay’s Naked 2 Palette.  Made in USA, assembled in the Dominican Republic and the brush that is included is made in China.  In my ethical behavior, I no longer purchase products from Urban Decay simply because the company is NOT ageing friendly. I received the most patronizing email from them and will never again buy anything from this company.  I feel they are not ethical in their recognition and respect of older women.

But shopping for clothing is where my ethics change.  Granted.  I will only purchase my sandals from Rondini in  France.  This is more about brand loyalty than my ethics.  I love the fact that the sandals are custom fit and made on the premises, rather than the mass-produced kind of many designer and not designer brands.  For about the same cost as a pair of Tory Burch made in a third-world country sandals, I can have a far superior pair of footwear.

Image result for atypical60 rondini

One of the collection of my Rondini sandals.  A very ethical family-run company. I’ve been spoiled and even if I can’t make it to France,  I can order these.

Same with Repetto ballet flats.  I’m extremely brand loyal to these beautiful and comfortable flats that are made in France, even though I should be more in tune with the fact they are sustainable and ethically produced.

Image result for atypical60 repetto

And less than Tory Burch flats too.  Repetto produces a quality shoe that is ethically made in France.

Regular readers of this blog are well-aware that my favorite clothing store is J. Crew. And a great number of the clothing from J. Crew is made in China.  It’s not stopping me from shopping there. The brand fits my style. The brand fits my taste and I can always get a great article of clothing for a very, very purse-friendly and inexpensive sale price.  Perhaps the reason the prices can be sold so low during sales is that the clothing is made in China and other countries.

My J. Crew Tippi Sweaters–not made here!  Does that mean that every single buyer of J. Crew clothing is an unethical person?  Hell no it doesn’t!

I’m also not adverse to fast fashion.  (I’ve recently written about my penchant for hi/low fashion).  In fact, fast fashion is a godsend for women, both younger and more mature in age, who cannot afford pricier clothing.

A very inexpensive fast-fashion Chanel-inspired jacket.  From a fast-fashion mail order site–Shein. And I love this jacket and will wear it with no shame!

These are the women who may be working for a larger corporation that hasn’t given out monetary raises in years because they are so hell-bent on putting money into their upper management’s pockets due to the big tax cuts they will receive.  Who’s ethical here?

These are the single mothers—working on a salary that doesn’t afford proper medical care for her or her children.  She needs to spend more on food and shelter for her family.  Why would a woman in this situation be considered unethical if she isn’t buying sustainable clothing?  Perhaps it is the politicians who take the medical care away who are unethical.

Do you remember Carol Burnett’s Charwoman character?   She was so human and despite the exaggerated costume, real. And there are millions of women in America who make a living cleaning and are not well-paid. I know this because my Irish grandmother worked as an office cleaner for years and was never paid what she was worth.

Not everyone can afford to be an ethical shopper.

AG Jeans–made in USA, but look, the jeans are also made of imported Fabric and globally sourced components–what is that about?  FWIT, I am a fan of AG jeans and only make my purchases at Nordstrom rack when they are on deep discount–it the only way I can afford them.  The other two brands are inexpensive and made in China and the quality and fit is excellent! Just sayin’

And another thing.  All these articles about why we should be shopping more ethically-hey, in our very own American backyard people are overworked for minimal wages. Businesses are allowed to make staff feel guilty if they don’t work 50, 60 hours a week whilst giving only five to ten vacation days a year.  Is that an ethical way to treat employees?

Talk to me about being a more ethical consumer after  corporations become more ethical in their practices–especially their ageist practices.

An ethical quality of life is more important to me than the way I shop.

I want to wake up to a completely ethical government and society first and foremost!

I’m sorrynotsorry for my views on this particular subject but I ran across this article from the site Racked:  Ethical, Sustainable Brands You Can Really Trust and it got my goat.  Now, I don’t know about you, but there is no way I am spending $35 on a pair of drawers to cover my ass and lady parts.  Perhaps the brand Anekdot should be more ethical in making a more affordable pair of underpants.

Anekdot has some beautiful underwear but there is no way I’ll spent $35 on underpants–even if they are spun with gold, I’m not spending it!

And please—I know tons of women in our age demographic  who adore Eileen Fisher clothing.  Sustainable perhaps but I refuse to walk around in those sacks of clothing that cost way too much money.  Not now. Not ever. Never!  The brand may speak to many women but to me is says “Don’t buy me.”

Eileen Fisher has a huge and loyal fan base.  I’m sorry, I am not feeling these clothes. They are baggy, boxy and totally unflattering.  I sometimes thing some of these clothing companies are cashing in on”ethical”–is it ethical to make a woman look like a burlap sack?  

Ethical brands may cost more—but the majority of folks, especially now, cannot afford to spend $165 on a pair of denim jeans.  And many who do put themselves in credit card debt. Is that ethical?

Same with my “hair”.  Turns out I’m not a very ethical wig shopper because the wigs I purchase are either made in China or Indonesia.

My hair.  China and Indonesia.  The hair is a touchy subject…

And I thank the good Lord for online wig vendors like Divatress and Hair to Beauty for keeping the costs of my inexpensive hair down.  The ethical thing is that these inexpensive wigs are giving women back their confidence and self-esteem.  You just need to know where to buy the goods.  Come to me an I’ll tell you where!

And in my most humble opinionated opinion, it’s more ethical to buy my cheap synthetic wigs than to give my business to a mumbo-jumbo company that sells false promises of growing hair through their overpriced treatments, shampoos and conditioners.  These companies are completely unethical by taking advantage of the vulnerability of women who still have hope that their hair will grow back more lush and beautiful than it ever was. They use aggressive tactics and harass people to buy the product. I know.  I’ve been harassed by these people.  They ain’t ethical!

Don’t even get me started on the unethical practices of the people who sell Monat. I’ve been harassed and bullied on social media by more than one of their representatives. I wouldn’t care if this stuff grew ten feet of hair overnight–their unethical treatment of consumers is disgusting!

No. I’m a realist and will not let one of those unethical companies take one cent of mine.  I’ll be unethical in my wig shopping instead. And it is because a great number of us women cannot afford to also spend upwards of $500, and into the thousands on wigs.

And even though most of the wig companies that do sell extremely expensive wigs are sustainable and ethical in practices, the average, middle-class and working-class woman cannot afford to spend thousands on wigs.  We have no choice but to veer into that naughty territory.  But, we can purchase from reputable sellers—and that’s what we do!

Let’s be more ethical in our judgement.  Just because someone may like fast fashion, or more affordable clothing or more affordable anything for that matter, doesn’t make them an unethical person.

I truly believe that nobody is unethical on purpose. No. Just. No.  The whole process of ethics is a cross between a spider web and a Pandora’s box.  But a lot has to do with the Benjamin’s (that’s cool people talk for dollars)!

Consumers don’t try to be unethical in their shopping practical on purpose. It’s the purse strings that speak.  So perhaps it’s time for those ethical and sustainable companies to lower their prices on the goods—and we can all be ethical!

Thanks to Sue for allowing me to ping-back her blog.  She really is a great writer and if you haven’t read her blog, head on over to the wilderness and have a look-see; but wear your heels. You’ll really like her!!

You know, I’m not the biggest Rolling Stones fan, but this song, You Can’t Always Get What You Want, is one of my favorites of theirs. It’s true. You can’t always get what you want.  But if you try sometimes, you’ll get what you need.  That pretty much sums up my ethics when it comes to shopping!

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Bland, Blonde, and January’s Hibernation Period Has Begun!

Posted on January 5, 2018 by Catherine

The tea is very hot and comforting to me right now.  The snow’s reflection from the lawns and the rooftops across the street makes the house brighter during this mid-day.

This English Breakfast Tea warms my body because it is 64 degrees in my house and is 10 degrees outside.  I’m afraid to touch the thermostat!

All is quiet.  The Pita bread has been made and is resting easy until dinner tonight.  Dough is in the oven proofing for Bonaparte’s favorite weekend Pullman loaf.

Chef John’s Pita Recipe! Hands down, it’s the best!

Chippy is snuggled up on the cozy throw I placed on one of the sofas to protect it from any paw dirt.

This little nugget is freezing his doggie balls off! But he’s comfy!

As I look around,  I wonder where the holidays went.  Did we celebrate Christmas—or was it just a vivid dream?  Last night Oona and I pondered this while talking on the phone.

Good bye tree…it seemed like we just got you yesterday!

Oops!  Looks like a certain Frenchman is happy the tree is leaving!

Tea is my filler as I study all my Weight Watchers information from years past.  I’m not even going to bother with the new “Freestyle” program because Weight Watchers changes their plans as many times as a mother of a newborn baby changes diapers.

Screw it. I’m sticking to Old School Weight Watchers–this program from 2012!

I’ll stick with what works—looking up points and tracking what I eat.

If I bite it, I write it!  Words to live by!!!!

Though I won’t weigh myself for another few weeks, I feel reassured knowing my clothing still fits—albeit tight, but still fits!

Yeah. They are tight but still fit. A great time to revisit a diet!

It snowed yesterday. Here in the Philly ‘burbs, it wasn’t a blizzard, but it was enough of an accumulation that, with the temperatures in the low teens and single digits, the white blanket will stick around for a while.

It’s gonna be a while before we have drinks out here!!

The view from yesterday…

And my annual “Bare Foot In The Snow” photo!

And that’s what I kind of like about January.  The month always seems longer than it is.  It’s that 31-day span when you just want to live in nothing but pajamas, wrap a cozy throw blanket around your body, sit on a deeply cushioned sofa and sink into it—whether you are reading a book, a magazine, bingeing on Netflix shows or playing Candy Crush Saga on your iPhone.

And as soon as I finish this post and head to the grocery store, I’m coming back and getting into this!!!!

This is the month of hibernation. When the winter is at it’s most wicked.  The wind isn’t softly kissing your cheek—it’s blowing you a sucker punch when you leave the house.  Running in this weather—I’m sorry but the only thing running on me is my nose!

January is a month of planning, reassessing and looking forward to the coming months of summer. And while January is visiting, I make no effort to throw this yearly visitor out to pasture. I welcome her. Life is too short to complain about the baggage she brings.  While we are housebound we get to work on projects.  Perhaps hanging drapes or curtains.  Maybe some new houseplants.  New pillows for the sofas?  Dressing up the bed with a new and fluffier-than-a-cloud comforter?  This is when we can do things that we don’t have time to do during the rest of the year.  January is a respite from our busy lives—time to stop and think about the roses!

I’m writing recipes into my bullet planner–don’t even ask why!!!

And now that the needles from the tree have been vacuumed up, I am enjoying the blandness of the house.

The corner of the living room where the tree stood is back to normal…

And flowers are adding color to a neutral scheme.

But, I’m also enjoying my blondness!  Yesterday a new wig came in the mail.  It was one that I was coveting so badly.  After watching a few YouTube reviews on this perfect long bob, I knew that Swami had to be mine.  The only thing was that she was sold out in every color with the exception of the TSMocha color, a blonde/brown color with darker roots.  I took the chance and ordered it anyway.

As Gomer Pyle would say “Surprise, Surprise, Surprise”!  I’m blonding it!

Can you believe this new hair?  

Let me tell you something.  I dig me as a blonde.  I’m feeling so “Khloe Kardashian”.    The change is so much fun!  And that’s what a wig should be—fun!  At this point wearing wigs is just a part of getting dressed and I’m equating it with a different sweater or shirt, pair of jeans or shoes.

I’m certainly living a little with this small change!!!

With fake hair, I’m not giving my bio hair additional damage by dying it every color of the spectrum. I can plop a different colored wig on my head and that’s it.

It’s funny—as we get age, we should be open to change. It’s a blast to get out of our ruts every now and then.  We don’t need to fulfill everyone’s stereotypes that we should look like a fart waiting to escape our pants.

I feel so Khloe Kardashian. I just may wear this wig on my 63rd birthday this April–or to our Gorman Family Reunion!!!

Change is fun. Change is good.  And whether it is the smallest amount of change like adding an animal print belt to your wardrobe or a change of traveling solo—it’s all wonderful.

What say you?  Any little changes you’re making?  Think about it.  January is a great month for thinking about change—we can do a lot of changing while in hibernation mode!

I did a wig video today on this spectacular long bob.  Here it is if you would like to further see my change. And if you like it, head over and subscribe.  My “goal” is to try to make more videos this year.  “Try” is my motivational word for 2018!

Have a great weekend!!!! XOXOXOXO

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The Christmas Decorations Have Been Put Away—But I’ve Got Gifts That Will Keep On Giving!

Posted on January 2, 2018 by Catherine

When I was a child, my mother never took the Christmas decorations down before The Epiphany, or Little Christmas, or Three Kings Day, in remembrance of the three kings who visited Baby Jesus on Christmas.   That first Sunday of January was always a pretty big deal because it meant that the Christmas Season had officially ended.

Little Me.  Secretly hoping my mother kept the tree up way past Ephipany!

When my three kids were young, I followed that same tradition and actually took the tree down the Monday after, when the kids were in school.  And they came home to the house the way it was before the holidays.

Today I woke up early, enjoyed my morning coffee then hit the deck, so to speak, to dissemble the banisters of the greens, lights and ribbons.  Ornaments were taken off the tree as were the gold garland and lights.

Screw it. I didn’t even bother to get dressed. Once I decided to take the decorations down, that was it!

Until late next November or early December, this little cutie is going for a long nap!

Why does it take less than a half-hour to put UP the lights and about three hours to take the lights DOWN?  And that’s only off the tree!

Honestly, I can’t stand the way the banisters look when I take the decorations down.  That’s the one thing that bothers me. I love the embellished stairways!

Back to basics now.  No more greens and berries atop the cupboard.

The runner we purchased in France last summer is back on the chest.  That  Waterford vase was a wedding gift from my ex-husband and his girlfriend. Isn’t it pretty?  It found a permanent place!

All holiday pillows and throws are now in tubs.  Damn–it looks bland now!

 

Tables and beds were stripped of Holiday linens.  Every decoration was put away.  The large and extremely heavy leaf that rests in the dining room table was taken out—making the transition to the smaller, more intimate one where Bonaparte and I enjoy our evening meals.

The downstairs guest room is back to normal…

And all the Holiday pillows and throws that were downstairs are with their upstairs pillows in tubs for next Holiday Season!

I was on a roll.  The kitchen got the scrub down from me too.  All that holiday baking left its mark in my work space and needed to be a bare slate once again.  Floors were swept and scrubbed.

I also spent the day boiling and reboiling the snail shells from the escargots I made. White vinegar in boiling water.  Four times around does the job. Now they are drying!

The only signs of Christmas 2017 are the many Poinsettias that I can’t bring myself to get rid of.  I actually like to keep them around for as long as possible.  The Christmas tree is still standing.  It is as naked as a jay bird and I’m in a state of shock that the tree hasn’t dried out yet.  Oh, there are fallen needles but it isn’t that bad.  We’ll take the tree out later during the week when Bonaparte has time. But overall, the house is bare.

The plaid tablecloth has been replaced with a Provencal one!  The poinsettias–some of which have been here since Christmas 2016!  I can’t get rid of these.

I also moved some to the dining room table/my pretend office! Geez. When the kids were young the dining room table was the homework and crafting table. Now it’s my make believe office!

Our naked tree.  I’m shocked at how remarkably well this one held up!  The needles are still very much pliable!

The decorations are marked and packed in plastic tubs and I only had one close call. I lost my phone.  In fear that I packed it away and was getting all anxiety-ridden that I would have to go through all the tubs, I retraced my steps and checked a large trash bag on the counter.  Thankfully, it was there.  I was carrying so much garbage around that I inadvertently threw the damned iPhone in the trash!

And now that all is calm, I can enjoy a few gifts that keep on giving.

Oh.  We didn’t exchange gifts this Christmas.  It turned out to be a good thing too because everyone has what they want. There’s nothing we need.  All I wanted was to be with the kids and we had that precious time together. I

However—we did exchange stockings.  And they were filled with candies, little things like socks and playing cards, bottle openers, toiletries and Old Navy Pajama bottoms and tee shirts.

My stocking was not filled by Bonaparte, nor was it filled by Santa.  Oona had the pleasurable task of filling mine.  And it did not come with coal.  But rather, it was filled with a few items that would keep on giving—for a while.

One of the things that was in the stocking was a package of two makeup remover towels.  Fresh Face. Oh, dear God—I was shocked at how great these towels are.  Who thinks of this stuff anyway?  The towels are very soft.  One side a bit less soft and acts as an exfoliating scrubber for skin and makeup. The other, softer side is to clean.  At first, I was skeptical about these—there’s no way makeup can be removed with something this soft.  But wait.  I couldn’t believe how clean the towels get your face.  This is a great gift that’ll keep giving and giving!

The brand is “Fresh Face”

One black and one pink and let me tell you..

I swear I didn’t even need my Albolene to take this gunk off my face! This towel and warm water did it.  I’m still in shock!  These things work!

 

Another gift that will keep giving—and has managed to give every day since I received it, may be a bit taboo of a subject to talk about, but—it’s the greatest thing since hot and spicy tortilla chips!  Poo-Pourri! That’s right.  A little ounce of lemon,Bergamot and lemongrass.  You spray this delightful elixir into the toilet bowl before you go poo-poo!  Trust me. This stuff works like a charm!

Hey. It has the “Good Housekeeping” seal of approval. This works. Never be embarrassed again when you go to someone’s home to visit.  You’ll spend all day on your throne at home!

But what really fascinated me about receiving this little scented gem of a gift was why??  Why did Oona stuff this into my Christmas stocking?  This—from my child.  Mind you, when the kids were young, the door to the little alcove in my master bathroom that housed my throne was always opened.  Not by me either.  Either the dogs decided to follow me hoping for a fallen piece of toilet paper or whatever else they could snatch from me, or one of the kids came running in for money or some sort of crisis.  As if I could help them while sitting down depantsed.

Besides that, I thought anything that left my body came out smelling like a rose.

Apparently not—but this Poo-Pourri is so great that we will be purchasing more of this.

Facial masks and bath fizzies were also a part of the little gifts that’ll keep on giving.  Although I’m down to the last fizzie.

Oona knows what mommy likes!  I used the hydrating one today after I decided to look human again!

…and I’m down to my last bath fizzie thingy!

My stocking also contained this gift that’ll keep giving.  Bonaparte and I can play while enjoying our aperitifs!

And last night, Bonaparte handed me a wrapped box.  I reminded him that we promised no gifts.  But he assured me it was just a little something.  And when I opened it up, I was thrilled with that little something.

It’s a new bottle of my favorite winter scent.  Guerlain’s L’Instant.  This scent was the first gift Bonaparte ever gave me.  We were a “new” couple at the time and he had to go to Paris to take care of some family business.  He came home with L’Instant and I’ve been wearing it ever since I received it in 2004!

I have never, and I mean, never received so many compliments from strangers–especially strange men, when I’m wearing this.  It’s like a scent magnet!!!

I’m at the bottom of my present bottle and this is absolutely the gift that’ll keep giving over the next year!

Oh…and just before I contemplated getting dressed, the doorbell rang. The postman delivered some hair for me.  How could I not make myself presentable? It was a wig I purchased for $6.99!  $6.99—I’m telling you I can’t buy shampoo and hair conditioner for  that price!

I gave myself a gift that keeps giving.  Hair!  Hey, I cleaned up rather well, didn’t I–but I stayed in my pj’s all day!  Why, I look almost as good as the Bobbi Boss wig model!

Bathed and makeup and hair on, I felt like a million bucks.  But I ended up in my pajamas for the remainder of the day.  I do clean up rather well though!

New hair.  Holiday PJ’s–you do realize I’ll be wearing these PJ’s until they fall apart–don’t you?

So that was it.  The decorations are down. Goodbye Christmas 2017.  How’s about you?  Are your decorations still up?  Do you take them down at Epiphany or do you wait a bit longer?  Do you miss Christmas already or are you happy it is back to normal? I wanna know.

Here’s the last Christmas Carol of the year.  As I was putting this away, I had to listen to it and make snow……

Oh Holy Night. Such a beautiful Carol!

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Ummmm… 2018 Isn’t Starting Out As Planned

Posted on January 1, 2018 by Catherine

Happy 2018.  As usual, I’m late to the party.  There’s a reason.

Kinda not starting the way I planned but it’s all good!

Last night, after finishing my last blog post of the year, about my wigs, Bonaparte and I sat down to a couple of Kir Royals to toast the last evening of 2017 and to enjoy a nice dinner.

2017. The year I “Got Wiggy” with it!

After dinner, a quiet evening of watching TV to ring in 2018. Let me start off by saying that New Year’s Eve is not my favorite holiday.  I find it a bit sad and melancholy and there always seems to be a sense of forced celebration–you know, everyone has to be at a party or gathering.  I just wanna be home in my pajamas!!

Tchin Tchin!  A quiet way to celebrate the end of 2017 and the beginning of a new year!

Oh…and I made escargot.  Those snails–they are so delicious!

Besides that, the song “Auld Lang Syne” makes me cry.  Between Judy Garland singing “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” in Meet Me in St. Louis and anyone who belts out Auld Lang Syne, I’m a human cannon spewing out tears and sobbing hysterically.

Happy New Year, from Bonaparte and I to you!!!!

Bonaparte suggested watching a new French series on Netflix.  The series, “La Mante” is a thriller starring Carole Bouquet as an imprisoned serial killer who has been asked to assist in a series of murders. This show is creepy AF!  It was so creepy that I woke up in the middle of the night after having a bad dream.  And that is how I welcomed the New Year!

Got Netflix?  Might I recommend La Mante if you aren’t the faint of heart!  Carole Bouquet is so creepy–the entire series is creepy.  I’m scared!

Moving on, my plan was to wake up early this morning and write a blog post to welcome the New Year. It was also my plan to work on organizing my planner and start to track my eating habits in my food journal.  And as I took the first sip of the first cup of coffee for this new year, Bonaparte gave me some news.

This is how far I got this morning..

 

My stepdaughter lost her car key.  That’s not so bad.  The bad thing is that she lost her key somewhere on the beach.  She and her husband and daughter welcomed the New Year at their new place down the shore. (Note—this is why I have always carried a spare key to my car in my wallet or purse at all times).

My blog post was delayed.  However, I did manage to take my diet journal and my planner with me so that I could do some journaling and planning in the car.

This is how far I got with the planner.  Maybe later this evening I’ll work on it some more!

Did I ever mention that when my husband drives he envisions himself as racing in the Grand Prix in Monaco?

Image result for jacques henri lartigue racer photo

Did Grandpere Jacques-Henri Lartigue have a premonition about his grandson’s driving prowess?  For the record, that is not Bonaparte and me–it’s some Lartigue French relative and friends.

I couldn’t write.  But I did nag.  I nagged him because he was driving way too fast.  Now, understand, I am a very compliant driver.  I follow the rules of the road. Driving is a privilege that I take seriously and I only go over the speed limit when I am fully aware that there are no cops on the road.

And about an hour-and-a-half into our drive down the shore, it seemed as though my car (Yes. He was driving my car) lifted off the road and was airborne.  The result of a super-sonic speed.

Then it happened.  A State Trooper was sitting off the road in his car and Bonaparte couldn’t slow down fast enough.  The lights went on, I started yelling and getting all drama-queen and Chippy rolled his eyes in the back seat. There is a good chance that the State Trooper heard my hysterics.  I was beside myself because I’ve never gotten a ticket in this car.  My car has a clean record and I actually forgot that it is the driver, not the car that gets the ticket.

I must admit, this State Trooper didn’t even look old enough to drive.  But it didn’t stop me from acting like a crazed lunatic.  On the verge of tears, I explained that my car had a clean record and my French husband had a memory lapse and thought he was back in France, actually, Monaco in the Grand Prix.

The Trooper was very kind and smiled as he told me to calm down and everything was ok.  Then he asked Bonaparte if her realized he was going over 90 MPH in a 65 MPH zone.  I interrupted, because I do that so well, and explained our situation.  Then I went on to say how much I respect officers because my own father was a NYC Police Officer and I whipped out my dad’s old PBA card.

This was one of the last things my dad gave to me before he died.  I think he knew I would need it. And it’s come in handy ever since 1992!

The conversation took a rather pleasant turn as Bonaparte did not receive a ticket. But that didn’t stop me from reminding my Frenchman that he needed to slow down—and I reminded him the remainder of the drive.

And as we drove off, I blessed myself and said a prayer of thanks to my father, I swear he was watching out for us.

My dad–and yes, I changed the words of  the “Our Father” prayer to “My Father”…hallowed be his name for getting us out of a ticket!

We arrived at the house, handed over the keys and didn’t stay long as Bonaparte wanted to get home. He’s not fond of the cold weather you know. I would have stayed all day…and overnight…perhaps until the weather warmed up!

The house is absolutely adorable….

But I just couldn’t understand why my step daughter insisted on showing ME the outdoor shower?  I think she’s afraid that I’ll spend hours in the bathroom getting ready!

The thing is, I’m glad we took the drive. I find the beach/shore very tranquil during the winter months when nobody is there.  I like the solitude.

A lonely wooden sailor stands alone outside a restaurant that is empty now but will be thriving come May..

The bay is like the frozen Tundra..

No signs of life…

..except for the person manning this toll booth and he didn’t seem to happy to be working today!

All is quiet and dormant.

Closer to home as the Philly skyline comes into view on this New Year’s Day!

So that’s why I’m late to the party.  It’s late afternoon on this New Year’s Day.  Tomorrow I’ll start taking the decorations down and once again, things will return to normal.

Ain’t gonna lie.  I miss the kids. I miss the activity but I’ve got lots to look forward to for this coming year.

And here’s what I wanted to say earlier:

HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL!

I’m late to the party but I wish everyone the best for 2018!

 There will be no resolutions because I always manage to break them.  There will be no goals because I never manage to reach them.  There will be no expectations because—well, just because!

But—I will try.  Because to try is the best I can strive for.  I will try to be a kinder person. I will try to focus. I will try my best to write. I will try, for my daughter, not to get all politically upset! I will try to be a better person because that’s all I can do for this new year.

And I thank each and every one of my Atypical60 friends for reading about my misadventures and my failures and successes.  Thank you for making me feel better when I’m not doing well. Thank you for your support and engagement.  Thank you for laughing with me and thank you for “listening” to my rants.  Also—thank you for enjoying my reviews and I will try to keep you entertained during 2018!

Best to all of you for a healthy, happy, and successful new year!

Here’s a nice song for you.  John Mayer’s 83.  It’s the year I became a mom and when I listen to it, I think of my oldest son!

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My Favorite Looks for 2017. The Wig Edition

Posted on December 31, 2017 by Catherine

As we close in on 2017 with but a few hours left, it dawned on me that this was the year that I could no longer go out in public with a topper or hair fibers to disguise my hair loss.  The worst part isn’t the hair loss itself, but the fact I can’t get to go to the salon to see Adam anymore.  I loved going to get my hair washed and blown out. It took me a lifetime to finally find a hair stylist who was the greatest then I lost too much hair.

My bio hair. Yeah. I’m lucky that I was born with a ridiculously thick mane. But the thinning is cause for self-consciousness and self-esteem issues.  The natural part is wider than Moses’ parting of the Red Sea.  You can see my scalp–even when I have my hair pulled back in a pony.  It’s not worth the mess of hair fibers. It is definitely NOT worth all those mumbo-jumbo products that *cough* *cough* “promise” regrowth. Nah. I’ll spend the money on wigs!

Oh well.

2017 was the year of the wig for me.  But it’s not a bad thing at all.  I mean, after all, I no longer have a bad hair day. I can also change the style depending on the weather or my mood. If I want a bob, I can have one without putting a scissor to the tresses.  If I want to go long, no problem—I’ll just go into my closet and pick a longer length wig.

Take your choice–straight, wavy bobbed?  Can’t change up bio hair like this on a daily rotation!

Lately I’ve been going a couple of shades lighter than my once, very black hair. And I like the color change.  Curly, straight, wavy, streaked—whatever.  It’s my hair because I paid for it!

Bonaparte has also put his two-cents worth in as well.  Upon his suggestion of a shorter, layered wig, I ended up taking a cue from him and now his suggestion is one of my faves!

Quite honestly, wigs should be a part of getting ready in the morning if you not only suffer hair loss, but also if you have aging hair.  I know. I know. Many women have hair that ages much better than others.  And if you’ve spent decades dying, blow drying, flat ironing, perming and performing other various forms of abuse on your locks, chances are in your fifties or sixties, your bio hair ain’t looking that great anymore.  Fuhgeddaboudit and get a wig!

Anyway, here are some of my favorites from 2017.  And a look at other wigs I’ve worn over the past year.  Let’s have a look, shall we?

I’m a huge fan of synthetic wigs.  Synthetic hair is affordable, versatile and washes well. It is low-maintenance for the most part.  And–not all synthetic wigs are created equal.  Some synthetics are better quality than others.  You find out through trial and error.  That’s one of the reasons I am literally addicted to inexpensive wigs.  They don’t cost more than a wash and blow-dry and last longer…anyway, read on, my girlfriends…read on…

THE NUMBER ONE FAVORITE WIG OF 2017–CARRIE LACE FRONT WIG BY LAVIVID!

I can’t say enough about this wig.  If I could afford to, I would have her in every color.  Carrie is the most expensive wig I have and at $188, she is still incredibly affordable compared to other brands.  The quality of the hair is stellar.  The cap construction is the best I’ve seen.  This wig does not tangle nor does she shed and she looks better and better with each wear.  The color is Number 5, Brown Spice. 

Details of Carrie.  On the left—check out the luster.  She’s not too shiny, which I love. She’s soft but not fine and the hair is dense.  On the right, check out that parting space. It’s life!!

NUMBER TWO FAVORITE WIG OF 2017: STORM U-CURVED LACE FRONT WIG BY MODEL MODEL

Storm by Model Model.  This is in Number 4, Brown.  I have four Storms and this is the lightest color.  At around $34.00 from both Sam’sBeauty and Divatress–she is a great value.

Let me tell you, Storm missed being the Number 1 wig by a small margin. That margin was the parting space.  The U-Curve design is supposed to lend itself well to various parting space but you have to “train” the wig if you want the part anywhere else but the right side. I love a left-side part and had to train this wig.  But even so, I wore a darker version all through France this past summer and the wig stood the test of wear.

NUMBER THREE FAVORITE WIG OF 2017-PERM YAKI 14″ BY OUTRE

A shorter-medium layered style wig, Outre’s Perm-Yaki 14″ had become a favorite because she is so darned natural looking and wears so well!  She retails for $24.95 on HairtoBeauty.com.   Other sites such as Divatress also sell this.

The number three Perm Yaki 14″ is the wig that Bonaparte suggested I try.  Since he was paying, I went for it and now I’m waiting for my 4th unit to come.  This is a great wig. I wore her a lot during the week that the kids were here.  Since there was a ton of activity, I wanted to wear a wig that would not tangle from the fabric on my sweaters.  She’s great. This is also a great wig for the mature woman who doesn’t want a lot of length but wants a youthful vibe.  Low maintenance, I comb through when I’m done, net her and place her back in the package.  She’s very natural looking too.  I’m glad the Frenchman saw this one!

OTHER WIGS OF 2017:

Clary by Sensationnel Empress.  On the site she looked less curly/wavy, but I like her.

Bonaparte likes this wig more than I do.  I’m really more of a straighter haired lover. It’s most likely due to the emotional trauma of growing up with naturally frizzy hair. I have issues.  Still, I like this wig.  She’s holding up well and was less than $20.00 when I made the purchase.

 

Jacoba by Model Model. I picked this up at a local beauty supply store. Wearing it pulled back helps to loosen the curls.

The wig above–I saw it in a local beauty supply store on a mannequin head.  The waves were so loose and beautiful–and I like Model Model wigs as a brand. They are well-made. I paid around $23 for this wig. When I got her home I almost cried. The curls were so ridiculously tight. That’s when I realized the wig in the store looked the way it did from being handled.  I wore Jacoba pulled back for an entire day and liked the way she looked. When I took the clip out, the waves were looser.  I’m still working on this one to make the waves even more loose.  She’s a decent wig though. No tangling and nice and dense!

 

Konis by It’s A Wig! Konis remains one of my favorites.  I love the style because it’s kind of a no style style.  Here she is in the color  TT99J/530.

Konis is one of my favorites. I have four of this wig.  In colors ranging from black to this burgundy color.  The length isn’t too long and it doesn’t shed.  Tangling is minimal and she wears well…

Here’s another look. And I just saw that WigTypes.com is having a sale price of $23.81. A great buy!

Kimmie by Freetress Equal.  She’s a gorgeous wig but….

Kimmie by Freetress Equal was a wig I couldn’t wait to get.  Reviews were great.  And she’s beautiful.  For the first few wears.  But this wig sheds so much to the point I thought it was my bio hair–and not in a good way.  Kimmie also tangles. A lot. And the ends frizz.  The frizzy ends can be fixed with a run-through of a flat iron.  But the time I’ve spent detangling this wig–well, I would not repurchase this. As pretty as she is, the maintenance is too much for lazy me!

Claudia by Bobbi Boss.  I’ve worn her quite a bit this winter..

Claudia by Bobbi Boss.  I saw reviews and decided to get this unit.  And when I first got this, I wasn’t crazy about her at all.  The left-side parting space didn’t look right on me.  But I took her back out, shifted the wig to a right-side part and now, I’m very happy with this one.  Not pin straight, and a bit more silky than heavy-yaki, I like this as an every day wig.  She retains her shape and is completely low-maintenance.  No shedding. Minimal tangling.

Perm Yaki 18″ by Outre.  This is another beauty.

You saw the Perm Yaki 14″ at the beginning of this post.  Bonaparte picked it out.  Well, here’s the longer version.  The Perm Yaki 18″.  That four inches makes such a difference. I love this wig so much that I have four of them.  But there’s also a downside to this longer version.  It doesn’t wear as well.  I’ve learned through trial and error that this can’t be worn with heavy textured sweaters or wooly scarfs because the tangling is horrific.  This is a wig that needs to be babied and handled with care.  That’s why I only wear this on special occasions such as date night.   This wig hits so close to home for me because it is just like my bio hair when I would give it a roller set. Big and very Long Island.  Although I’m well-aware of the maintenance, I will keep getting this one!

A newbie that’s sure to be a fast favorite!  Isis Brown Sugar BS 223 in the color Raisin.

At $35, this Isis Brown Sugar BS 223 wig was on the higher side of truly inexpensive.  This wig is a goodie.  Again, it’s my favorite kind of style, a no-style, style.  The hair is thick and lustrous.  The cap is comfortable. This raisin color is really, really nice. No shedding. No tangling!

Another wig from It’s A Wig. This is Justine and I love this one too!

It’s a Wig makes great wigs.  This–Justine is a bit longer than Konis but the two are very similar.  Are you getting an idea of the kinds of wigs I like–LOL!!!

The Bobs.

Truth be told, as much as I love the bob, it’s a struggle for me.  When I had my bio hair in a bob, the maintenance was ridiculous.  It looked fine in the winter, but once the spring hit, and any bit of humidity was in the air,  my hair would turn into a frizzed-out pyramid.  You would think that wigs would solve the problem.

Well, yes—and no.  I don’t think a bobbed wig is the easiest to wear. At times, they can look very wiggy–not necessarily from the front, but from the sides and back.  Don’t get me wrong.  I still love a good bob–but as wigs, they are a challenge to find.

Millie by Bobbi Boss.  This bob is very well-constructed and is one that I do wear often.

Millie by Bobbi Boss isn’t the perfect bob for me. It looks a bit “soccer mom”–and I was a baseball/basketball/fieldhockey/irishdance/football mom.  OK????  The hair’s density is wonderful.  It is large head friendly.  I love the yaki texture and the fact it isn’t shiny.  My biggest issue is that I find myself fussing with this thing because the “bob” doesn’t lay right all day.  As I am extremely lazy, I don’t like that!

The Wig–LH Nicky Bob.  Now THIS is a bob!

LH Nicky Bob by The Wig.  The photos above don’t do this wig justice.  The lighting made the wig look a bit shiny and it isn’t.  But I love this bobbed wig. Trust me, it was hard taking the photo of the back but it isn’t uneven. This is just one of those great bobs.  There isn’t much else to say!  This is a human hair blend and was just under $30.00

Can you find the pic of me in my natural hair state?  You got it–second from left in the bottom row.

These are just some of the wigs that have gotten me through the journey of my hair loss.  And it’s fun.  Not all wigs are created the same.  Not all wigs have ended up wearing as well as I thought they would.  But at least I always have a great hair day.

Let me add, there are a ton of online wig shops for you to make your purchases.  The ones that I purchase from and are my faves are:  HairsoFlyShop; Divatress.com; Hairtobeauty.com; Locobeauty.com; Elevatestyles.com; Wigtypes.com; Glamourtress.com

And don’t forget to research, research, research and check out reviews on YouTube!

And I hope that 2018 is an even better wig year!  Happy New Year’s Eve. Be Safe and Have fun.

Love for the New Year!!! And Thank You for being with me!!

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The End of Christmas and My Favorite Looks from 2017. The Clothing Edition

Posted on December 30, 2017 by Catherine

The house is now quiet.

The blanket of snow makes the outdoor noises quieter too!  Shhhhhhhh!!!  Nature is sleeping!

Gone are the familiar hums of background noise—you know the kind.  Songs from a son’s cell phone upstairs playing songs on Spotify.  Moans of anguish from downstairs as another son watches his favored football team fumble along with the dismal commentary from the announcers on TV.  The sounds from the dialogue of a Netflix series binge as the daughter and her boyfriend announce their shock and surprise at the twists and turns of the plot that completed the active symphony of life are no more.

It’s all quiet.  The sun room isn’t very sunny today. I think the entire house is a bit sad!

Earlier today, we drove through the snowfall into Center City to drop Oona and her boyfriend Sam off at the Megabus. They will be joining friends in DC for New Year’s Eve festivities and then returning home to Cincinnati.

The last of the kids are gone…it is certainly an empty nest today,,,,

Even Chippy is sad–he was getting very much used to being spoiled and petted on demand!

And just like that, Christmas 2017 is over.  In a bit over 24 hours the 2017 year will be over.

I lit the tree early today–just because I wanted some last-minute Christmas Spirit before it comes down.

It has certainly been a year of ups and downs, peaks and valleys, laughter and tears. And my best moment this past year was the marriage to my Frenchman!

Me and the handsome Bonaparte!

My worst moment was the realization that I packed on 15 pounds since losing my job in September.  I’m so disappointed in my failure.  But all is not lost because it’s back to Weight Watchers and eating healthy come the new year.  The great thing about the journey is that I’ll be able to write about it again—and my progresses and failures.  It’s all good. And I’m looking forward to sharing my further weight loss!

And that brings me to reflecting on the fun I have had over this year with my wardrobe. I got into posting many of the daily outfits on Instagram as well as on blog posts.

Now—if you are a regular reader of this blog, you are well-aware that there’s a certain way I dress.  This dates back to my days as a student in Catholic School when I wore uniforms.  Those uniforms, believe it or not, set the foundation for the way I prefer to dress as an adult.

True dat.  This woman, Sr. Mary Isabel, Sr. of Mercy, and principal of St. Patrick’s Grammar School, along with my mother, set the foundation of my personal style!

I’m not a flamboyant dresser nor am I what one would call trendy.  I may follow a few trends but in the long run, I’m pretty loyal in my style.  Classics.  Plaids.  Simplicity.  Nothing outrageous or fussy. Blazers. Jeans.  Ankle-length pants.  Lightweight sweaters.  Tee shirts.  Loafers.  My obsessive penchant for pointy-toed shoes baring toe cleavage.  That’s pretty much it.

Image result for the preppy handbook

My style is so simple that even Mrs. H’s mode of dress is just a tad too “too” for me!  Tone it down a bit honey–you’re trying too hard!

On the cusp of 63 years, I know, at this point in my life, what works and what doesn’t. I like ensembles—not costumes.  I like too look current—not outdated.  And I wear what I want to. I do not let age nor do I allow others to tell me how, in my 60’s I should be dressing.

So, with that said, come on with me.  Let’s go through some of my favorite looks from 2017—the Clothing Edition.  The Wig Edition will be my next post!

January 2017: (CAVEAT–the photos suck because I hadn’t gotten my new iPhone yet with the better camera!

I LOVE this look–it’s one of my all-time faves.  The tan suede mini shirt with black tights, black boots, black turtleneck and a nubby plaid scarf.  It’s so simple and classic. Black & Tan!  What’s not to love?

Another simple look–and those pants are much tighter on me a year later!  Plaid pants that hit above the ankle, pointy-toed, cleavage-bearing kitten heels and a simple sweater. Fake pearls. Leather Longchamp bag.  Non-fussy and basic.  J. Crew head to toe!

Another favorite look.  Black knit pixie pants.  Trench. Red turtleneck. Plaid scarf. Ballet flats.  Simple but not boring or dull.  Oh look–it’s my bio hair!

February 2017:

Classic Jeans and blazer look.  Ankle jeans from AG Jeans, Bass Weejuns, plaid shirt and J. Crew Schoolboy blazer. Honestly, THIS is one of my uniform looks.  It is comfortable and casually polished.

Another favorite.  Skinny jeans tucked into over-the-knee boots, a denim shirt, a striped sweater and a schoolboy blazer.  

February was my month for jeans!  The one trend that I absolutely am in love with is the tattered jean look.  Hey–who knew?  But I can’t help it.  Check out the toe cleavage on those Via Spigas!!!

March, 2017:

Back to St. Pat’s uniform look!  Plaid kilt, very much like the one I wore to school.  Over-the-knee boots and black turtleneck.  Doesn’t get more basic than this! I lost enough weight that the skirt’s waist was too big so I had to paper clip it.  Um..that ain’t happening now.

A pair of J. Crew Campbell pants. I love these patterned pants and I may wear them tomorrow because they got too big on me but I’m sure now they fit again.  A cozy sweater and loafers complete the look!

 

This look–I wore it on a Saturday and I could not believe the amount of compliments I received with this look.  Jeans, a simple J. Crew Tippi Sweater and a plaid Schoolboy blazer. It remains one of my best-loved looks from this past year!

More Black & Tan!  A Merino Wool turtleneck, black Pixie Pants and a good amount of costume jewelry, which I don’t wear so much at one time.  

A very casual Sunday look. We were in DC for the weekend and the weather was surprisingly warm for March.  I wore this to the National Gallery.  I love the jeans/loafers/striped shirt/blazer combo!

April, 2017:

April weather is getting warmer. Boy–I hadn’t realized how much I wore tattered jeans this past year.  I love this going-out-to-dinner look. The lady jacket and fancy heels with the torn jeans.  It’s a lovely contrast!

This striped skirt.  It’s a gazillion years old and I got it at Old Navy for five bucks on clearance.  This is why I don’t have a capsule wardrobe.  Clothes can make appearances after a few years.  My stripes match the striped socks of Bonaparte’s!

This was a try-on at J. Crew Factory. I made the purchase and I LOVE this dress. It’s a great casual dress and the sneakers give it a youthful and fun vibe.

Denim jackets!  I paired this with a fun pom-pom shirt and navy knit pants.  The scarf is Lilly Pulitzer for Target.  I love this look–it’s a fun springtime look and casual but not sloppy!

May 2017:

A fun suiting look that doesn’t take itself too seriously.  Navy blazer. Navy pants. Red heels and a Heels on Fire tee from J. Crew.  

A very pragmatic office look. Navy pencil skirt, flats, striped shirt.  It’s a comfortable look.

Black and red. A very ladylike but very simple look.  No frou-frou. No fuss. I like this!

June, 2017:

Looks like I got my new iPhone because the photos look better.  A lightweight pleated skirt, white sleeveless tee and a lightweight scarf are perfect for early June.  I must have had my shoes downstairs!

This chambray shift. Another oldie but goodie. It’s so simple but I love the cut of it.  It is and remains one of my favorites!

Another loose shift. I love simple dresses like this for summer dressing. One stop dressing–that’s it!

I call this my Bardot look–even though I look nothing like her.  The light cotton skirt and striped shirt remind me of St. Tropez. 

July 2017

This was my most-worn outfit of the summer. I wore it a lot when we were in France–at ten bucks it was the steal of the century.  This lightweight jersey dress is THE perfect travel dress. 

Another inexpensive but great travel dress that served me well in France. $16 at Primark and the beauty of it is that I was able to go braless!!!

I need a moment here. This skirt is so out of my usual comfort zone because I’m not big on animal print clothing but this skirt.  This. Skirt. It’s my favorite. Surprisingly it is incredibly versatile.  It can be worn all year and bringing it to a casual elegant look with heels and a denim jacket.  I dig this so much!

August 2017:

Another shorts look.  I’m guessing we went to a movie theater and the A/C had me wearing a blazer. I dunno but I like the way it looks.

DING. DING. DING!!!  I KNEW I WOULD FIND THIS PIC!  THIS IS MY ALL-TIME, FAVORITE LOOK OF 2017.  THAT FANTASTIC LEOPARD PRINT SKIRT BUT THIS TIME WITH A BALLET NECK TEE, PEARLS (FAKE, OF COURSE) AND POINTY-TOED HEELS.  It’s such a non fussy look but I really love it. It’s so classic and timeless!!

Another late-summer look.  Simple as pie. Ballet flats, pixie pants and a lightweight plaid swing top.  Nothing else except a stray bra strap! Other than the bra strap, this is another favorite look from the summer.

September, 2017:

White tee, Stewart plaid lady jacket, torn jeans and ballet flats. A classic autumn look.

For those September cooler days a lightweight scarf over a tee and comfy jeans with flats.  These flats. Let me tell you something.  They are the one item from J. Crew that was a complete fail. Gemma flats. The wear on these shoes was awful. After three wears they just looked awful and stretched out.  It’s a shame because they could have been great shoes! Regardless, I still love this look!

Another favorite and because I can go braless in this checked off-the-shoulder shirt, it’s even more of a favorite.  Ankle jeans and orange Repetto ballet flats give this incredibly simple look a fun turn!

A job interview look.  Very conservative but not bland.  It was for an Admin position at a recovery house. The funny thing is that the guy interviewing me was all pedantic in his speech and blabbing on an on how fair and wonderfully empathetic he was.  Yeah. He was so empathetic that he never even emailed me to let me know I did not get the job!

Back to basics–and a memory of uniform dressing.  Blazer, simple tee, pants and fun flats.  These Gemma flats are faring much better than the others from J. Crew!

Another casual October look.   I love a plaid shirt and a blazer. Don’t you?

November 2017:

More Black & Tan.  You know, I guess I really love this color combo. I wore these pants for Thanksgiving.  This must have been taken around that time because I started decorating for Christmas.  Boy. Time goes by quickly!

Some hi-lo fashion here.  J. Crew pants paired with an inexpensive lady jacket from Shein.  I love this jacket and this is a great look for work or meeting friends.

I can’t help myself.  I’m a complete basic. These two outfits personify my simple style. No embellishments.  The clothing is the focal point.  And these are favored looks of mine!  You don’t need a lot of fussy to dress well.

I’m plaiding it up big time but I love the burgundy shoes with these pants.

OK. So I’m on the edge of 63 but I love a plaid skirt, tights and sweater. Keeping a long line with tights that match the shoes is key.  

December 2017:

And here we are at the last month of this year.  I didn’t do a lot of fancy dressing this month because I was so focused on getting the house ready.  I’m very sad today but had a fun time going through all the outfits that I truly loved from this year.

A casual vibe while running errands.  I like wearing fake pearls because the white luster adds a bit of light to the face.

Boots, pixie pants, a sweater and scarf warm the December air.  Those boots.  They broke again. I swear do NOT ever spend your money on Tory Burch boots. They are so shoddy.  The money I’ve spent in repairing these things is ridiculous. I’m seriously thinking of returning them to Nordstrom. The frustrating thing is that they look so good though!

MY SECOND FAVORITE LOOK OF THE YEAR!  Honestly.  I am so in love with these FancyPants that I got for less than thirty dollars at Old Navy. I wore them for our special dinner that the kids gave for us.  The pants are just not me but then they are!  I love this look so much!

Berry Pink in December?  Sure. Why not?  I was feeling a bit wild so I wore a bright Tippi sweater!  I like the look!

Back to plaid!  The blazer, that is.  Jeans, a black sweater, black ballet flats and a white scarf make a casual classic pulled-together look polished for Christmas food shopping!

And to complete this circle of fashion, the same skirt and sweater that I started this post in–only different boots and a pineapple necklace. I wore this to the airport to pick up Oona.  #Saturdaysharelinkup

That’s it.  A year’s worth of my favorite looks. Many variations on a theme and proof that you can still dress basic without being dull and boring.

I’m giving myself the evening off from laundry and getting the house back in order. I’ll pull a Scarlett O’Hara and do it tomorrow. After all, tomorrow is another day!

Here’s a little bit of snowy heaven. I filmed this after dropping Oona and Sam off at 30th Street to catch the Megabus to DC.  Enjoy!!

A snowy drive through Fairmount Park!

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Dysfunctional Mom’s Christmas Saga. Part Four. The Battle of the Philly Cheesesteaks!

Posted on December 29, 2017 by Catherine

Christmas turned out to be ridiculously dysfunctional and overly-dramatic—thanks to yours truly. And in the end, it managed to be one that will go down in Dysfunctional Mom’s history as one of the more “unforgettable” ones. But the Holiday Season is still upon us.

Christmas Day 2017 may have passed, but I’m still celebrating in my ever-present dysfunctional way!

The day after Christmas, Jake had to fly back to Los Angeles for work. Which, after being with Dysfunctional Mom for almost five days, I’m sure he was welcoming the flight back to the West Coast ,and being far from me in his new home across the country, with inner joy.

The house was still full of activity because Oona’s boyfriend, Sam, was arriving early in the morning.  His flight got into Philly at 8:00 AM.  I asked Oona if she wanted me to accompany her to the airport.  Still suffering the emotional trauma of her arrival at the same airport and the drama that Dysfunctional Mom caused, (See Part One)  she declined my generous offer.

 

This guy. Sam.  He fit right in!!!  

Our plan for the day was to drive to South Philly before dropping Jake off at the airport for his return to California.  The kids were on a mission and they asked me to come with them. The mission—to see which of the two-iconic popular Philly Cheese steak institutions was the better—Pat’s or Geno’s?

No!  We be Philly Cheese Steakin’!

Now at this point, not only had my muffin top of fat overflowed from the waist of my jeans, presently and officially making it a cake top, but the tightness had traveled down to my thighs.  I’m a human sausage stuffed into a casing of skinny denim—so I may as well gorge on a cheese steak or seven.

Bonaparte was working and my big choice was to either stay at home and pick through the leftover mac and cheese……..

Leftover cold mac & cheese. Why even bother to reheat it? It’s going straight to my belly, hips and thighs anyway..

Taki Fuego Chips, Flaming Hot Cheetos, rescue the biscotti that I hid from everyone, bake more cookies, stick my fingers into dip, lick the dip off and then follow it all up with an Alka-Seltzer chaser or accompany the kids into Cheese steak country.

Flaming Hot Cheetos?  Yayuh!!  With a glass of milk it’s just pure junk food heaven.  Weight Watchers starts January first!

I opted for the Cheese steak.

Since nobody is too fond of my driving prowess, Roman got behind the wheel.  He welcomed the chance since his mode of transport is the NYC Subway system and driving allows him the practice he needs—just in case he needs to rent a car any time soon or if he decides to follow Jake to L.A.

Street parking was a challenge, but not as much a challenge as being back in New York.  We found a spot a few blocks away from Geno’s and Pat’s and hoofed it in the sub-zero weather.

This is why I’m so happy to wear wigs!  In the winter, wigs are extra security to keep my head warm and toasty! The five of us, me, Jake, Roman, Oona and Sam ventured from the heat of the car and into the great outdoors of the row homes, wrought iron fences, concrete sidewalks and spectacular sunshine of this glorious day after Christmas. And not a power outage in sight made me even happier!  Ahhhhhh.  It was so good to walk the city streets!

Ahhh..the joys of fake hair!  It’s basically a wig hat and keeps that gray matter even more warm and protected than ever! BTW–I’m wearing what may quite possibly be the greatest true pink lip color of all time.  NYX Butter Gloss Number 4, Merengue. 

We arrived in front of Geno’s.  It was cold as balls.  Luckily our arrival was well-timed.  At just before the Noon crowds arrived, the lines at both establishments were not yet too long.

We split into teams.  Standing on the line at Geno’s were Roman, Oona and Sam.  Sam, might I add, has made the segue into the family very smoothly.  In other words, he fits right in.  Luckily for Oona, he was not traumatized or emotionally affected by my dysfunctional behavior of the past few days as he arrived but a few hours before we ventured into South Philly.

Jake and I were the other team and we headed across the street to Pat’s.

We arrived just in time.  The line, still short, was growing by the second.  Everyone coming to Philly wants a cheese steak! And they also want to text to the world that they ARE getting one!

The cold was the biting kind that hits you in the face and after a few moments of conversation, your chin becomes too numb to speak.  Your nose freezes and God forbid if it runs, you ain’t gonna be able to tell.  Thankfully, I didn’t have a cold so the only thing running was my mouth–which eventually ended up being to frozen to open and close.

Thankfully, before the deep freeze of the atmosphere completely numbed our mouths, we were able to discuss the kinds of cheese steaks we would order.  Since we were, for the most part, still “fooded out”, we went with “wit-out” (without onions) and cheese steaks with provolone and others with Cheese Whiz. (My personal favorite).

If I had any balls, I would have frozen them off.  But—I’m a trooper and Jake and I stood on the line at Pat’s, which was growing longer by the second, anticipating the joy that we would be experiencing when we finally had our warm and gooey cheese steaks in hand.

Jake, giving me the side eye because I’m taking a photo of him while he’s freezing his balls off! because he didn’t wear a heavy enough coat!  Only a dysfunctional mom can get away with that!

Ordering these logs of delight at Pat’s was akin to Seinfeld’s The Soup Nazi episode.

Yup. This is pretty-much how you order the cheese steaks. If you waste too much time, no cheese steak…….

A tongue-in-cheek sign was in place just before one approached the window to order the cheese steak.  And you order how you want your cheese steak.  No fussing around.  No special orders. No credit or debit cards.  Just cash. And cheese steak orders.  If you want soda or fries, you must order separately at a different window, which was just steps away.

For tourists and food snobs–read the sign. OK???

After placing and receiving our orders, Jake noticed that Roman, Oona, and Sam were across the street—but not at Geno’s.  They were loitering in front of a bar and they had their wrapped sandwiches in hand.  We kept motioning to them to come over but they refused.

Roman, Oona, and Sam. Loitering in front of the bar which proved to be a saving grace–just like church!

The outdoor seating gave me cause to want to run back to the car to eat.  But Sam saved the day.  He noticed a worker at the bar where they were now standing in front of.  Sam asked the guy if we could bring the cheese steaks into the bar if we order drinks.  Guess where we ate?

The crew is mighty happy now!  Cheese steaks and drinks and the warmth of a bar.  What could be better?  I’ll tell you what could be better.  If perhaps there were a few NY Giant’s jerseys hanging off the walls of this place!  Seriously–the bartender here was the greatest and she was adorable too!

Ensconced in the warmth of the bar, we attacked our sandwiches like a pack of wolves out in the wild—only we were indoors.  Drinks ordered, we sat down to discuss the nuances of each cheese steak.  It was decided that the best  was the Pat’s, wit-out and with Cheese Whiz.  It was also decided upon that the Geno’s bread fared better than Pat’s.

Pat’s–the winna of….

…our Cheese Steak Competition.  This is my cheese steak.  Oozing with the fake golden goodness of an overabundance of cheese wiz and wit-out the onions.  Trust me, if I had the onions, I would have ended up in the ER with a gallbladder attack!

Although, in all fairness, the kids voted that Geno’s had the best bread.  I still went with Pat’s on the bread though.

And both establishments had stellar paper for wrapping the cheese steaks.

Geno’s wrapping–cute and colorful..

..While Pat’s takes on a more pragmatic wrapping. But both wrappings are strong AF and nothing will leak through! Perhaps I may be able to use them as a Depends one day!

With full stomachs you would think we were finished with any further consumption of food for the day. Not so.   As we passed an Italian bakery next to Geno’s, we had no choice but to stop in for cookies and cannoli.  $36.00 worth of flavorful fat and sugar.

Cafe Crema Cannoli–because at this point, why the hell not??

It was at this moment that I started thinking about the Half-Yearly sale at Nordstrom because my bra  cup just went up a size from all the food that was ingested over the past five days.  I’m not kidding.  Just call me Hoover! My underwire cups runneth over.  And over.  And over!

Back in the car, we made a rather cozy group as we drove through Philly and upthe I-95 corridor back to the airport.  The Holiday crowd of travelers had subsided.  The make-believe airport police were nowhere to be found—especially on this freezing day.  The traffic was minimal to none.

Bye Frankie.  Bye Bobby.  Bye Fabian Forte. Watch over Pat’s for me. OK???

And just like that—Jake exited the car, with me after him to kiss him goodbye.  He picked up his luggage from the trunk and faded into the afternoon sun as he made his way to the terminal.

I may be a dysfunctional mom, and my drama knows no boundaries.  But my heart just gets a bit weepy when any of my kids leave me.  It’s like that empty Sunday night feeling—only this was a Tuesday. And I realized as I watched him walk into the terminal that I won’t see him for a long time.  And no matter how old your kids are, when they leave you, you still see them as they were when they were children.

It’s true. Jake may be 34 years old, but this is how I still see him…

Roman went back to New York yesterday and Oona and Sam leave tomorrow.  Yes. I’ll be sad, but when I want a dose of happiness, I’ll read this post because it was one fun adventure!

I can’t stop thinking of this song by John Lennon whenever my kids leave. “Watching The Wheels”.  It reminds me of life as a dysfunctional mother!

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